“How you doin'” may have worked like a charm for Joey Tribbiani, but opening lines today, especially on a dating app, require a little more thought and originality to get you noticed.

“Opening lines, like first impressions, are really important — especially on dating apps or online-only contact — because people are so busy and so inundated with other responses,” says April Masini, a New York-based relationship and etiquette expert and author. “An opening line can make it or break it when you’re looking to date.”

WATCH BELOW: To catch a catfish: Why do people create fake online dating profiles?

To catch a catfish: Why do people create fake online dating profiles?

Masini says to avoid opening with a sarcastic remark, as it’s too easily misinterpreted and to skip the sexual innuendo.

“Even if the person is in a bathing suit, avoid any opening line that mentions their body parts. They know they’re hot, that’s why they posted the photo they did. They want to know that you think they’re hot and datable,” she says.

The other reason why you should stay away from pointing out their sexiness is that it’s a given: “You wouldn’t be messaging them if you didn’t think they were hot,” says Toronto-based celebrity matchmaker and online dating expert, Carmelia Ray.

There are a number of tactics you can take with your opening line that will get someone’s attention, but above all else, Ray says, use that line on someone you’re truly compatible with.

“Do not message people if you’re blindly swiping left and right,” she says. “Read their profile and determine if you’re genuinely a match. Otherwise, you’re just wasting your time.”

These are some top tips from the experts on how to craft an opening line that will get a response on your dating apps.

#1 Give a little

“You’d be surprised how many people don’t give genuine compliments because they’re afraid of rejection,” Masini says. Go for something specific and genuine that shows you’ve really read their profile or noticed something about them that wouldn’t be obvious to everyone.

READ MORE: 5 signs you’re falling out of love

Terran Shea, a Toronto-based matchmaker and date coach, says the keywords with a compliment are “tasteful” and “specific.” She advises personalizing the compliment as much as possible, and if you’re going to reference a celebrity or something from pop culture, be vague. It’ll force the person to Google the reference and then you’ll be on their mind.

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Suggested lines: “You look like someone I could take home to my mom and whisk away for a romantic weekend”; “My friends would be jealous if you went out with me”; “Has anyone ever told you that you look like [fill in name of obscure actor/actress].”

#2 Be funny

Admittedly, this isn’t the right approach for everyone, but if you can strike the right chord, humour is almost always a winning trait.

Masini says not to go too dark or shoot for “slip on a banana peel” humour: “Aim for charm and chuckle.” While Shea says if the person you’re messaging has written a funny profile, try to mimic that style of humour in your line.

Suggested lines: “What’s a smart, attractive man/woman like myself doing without your number?”; “I can feel you staring at my profile from here”; “I totally hear you that grammar matters; it’s sad how few people use semicolons in their Tinder messages.”

#3 Show some confidence

Confidence is a very attractive trait and could be the key to success when it comes to communicating through online dating apps.

“A bold opening line doesn’t just convey confidence, it also shows that you’re out there to have fun, regardless of the outcome,” says John Roche, a therapist and coach at Transformation Counselling in Waterloo, Ont.

It’s also the best way to stand out, says Laura Bilotta, a Toronto matchmaker and author of Single in the City.

“Now is not the time to play coy,” she says. “Even if you play it over-confident, most people will understand that you’re trying to stand out rather than being vain.”

Suggested lines: “This app says we’re 93 per cent compatible. I’d like to test that out in real life”; “I love that picture of you on the beach; I wish I were there”; “I woke up thinking today was just another boring Monday, and then I saw your photo on my app.”

#4 Invite engagement

Your ultimate goal here is to inspire a back-and-forth conversation that will lead to a face-to-face encounter, so invite engagement by posing questions.

READ MORE: Dating with an STI: 7 ways to navigate the (often harsh) dating world

“Make a reference to something specific,” Ray says. “Maybe they mentioned a particular type of food they like in their profile or they’ve posted a picture in front of the Eiffel Tower. Ask them a question that’s specific to that.”

By offering this type of engagement, not only have you demonstrated that you’ve really read their profile, but you’re also more likely to get a response and spark a conversation.

Suggested lines: “I love Paris. Did you go to the top of the Eiffel Tower?”; “You’re a real foodie. If we were to go out for dinner, where would we go?”; “What’s your favourite pizza topping?”

#5 Be authentic

Authenticity can seem like a pipe dream when you’re meeting people through a digital app, but being genuine and even showing a little vulnerability can be very charming.

“People appreciate authenticity in a first message. By revealing something you might not normally be forthcoming with, it shows that you want to build trust,” Ray says.

READ MORE: Is it ever OK to date your friend’s ex?

This isn’t the time to unload your deepest secrets or childhood traumas, but it’s OK to share your trepidation of using a dating app or that you normally wouldn’t have the courage to approach this person in real life. Honesty is an attractive trait.

Suggested lines: “I’m new to this dating scene and to be honest, it kind of scares me”; “I don’t normally contact people on this, but I find you very intriguing”; “How does a person like me get a date with someone like you?”

You know that slight flush and those positive vibrations you feel when the “You Matched!” screen appears when you’re Bumbling? Whether you’ve been using Bumble for a couple years or a couple of days, that sensation never really goes away. And while the match is the critical first step to possibly making a meaningful connection, it’s what comes next — your ice-breaking introduction line — that can make all the difference.

To help you out, we’ve prepared some first-message guidelines based on your dating personality type below. (Not sure what your dating persona is? Take the quiz here!)

Empathetic

Kindness comes naturally to you–not only do you consider other people’s feelings, but you prioritize them. To showcase this, try opening with a cute compliment, or asking a question that allows your match to open up. 

Love your taste in music. What’s the best concert you’ve ever been to?

Ooh super cool pics. Are you into photography?

Hi! How are you *really* doing right now?

Confident

Your success derives from asking for what you want and not wasting anyone’s time (we love a trailblazer). Stick to these roots by telling your match what it is about them that caught your eye.

Your dog is so cute! Hopefully he’ll make an appearance on our first date? 😉 

Lol your bio had me on the floor. Wanna link up sometime and tell each other dad jokes?

Not gonna lie– you are SO my type. Your smile 😍

Humorous

The best way to win someone’s heart? Make them laugh! Luckily, your wit just so happens to be your greatest strength. Put your best foot forward by keeping things light-hearted, and don’t be afraid to get corny!

Are you my appendix? Because you give me this weird tingly feeling and I kinda want to take you out.

I know we’re all sick of being quarantined, but I’m trying to LOCKDOWN someone like you.

Alright, I’m here. What are your two other wishes?

Intellectual

You’re quite the thinker and love that there’s always more to know about a fellow human. Impress your match by making an astute observation or asking a question that leads to deeper conversation. 

Is that a [insert band name] tee you’re wearing in your third pic? Love them!

Wow, you definitely have a way with words. Who’s your favorite author?

Which do you think is more important: time or money?

Adventurous

As a thrill-seeker, you’re determined to make the most out of life, and that means taking risks. Show off your adventurous side by asking a quirky question that’s sure to spark an interesting convo!

What would you do if you were invisible for a day?

Kiss, marry, kill: Salsa, queso, guacamole.

Alright, let’s see what you’ve got. Truth or dare?

No-Frills

Maybe you’ve had luck simply by introducing yourself or asking people what they’re up to. If so, there’s no shame in sticking with what works. You can beef up your first line a bit simply by adding an Emoji or GIF.  After all, sometimes a visual cue better expresses what you want to say.

Hey {Name}! What are you up to this weekend?

Hey! How’s your Tuesday going?

I spent 20 minutes trying to think of a curated pickup line, but I didn’t want to keep you waiting any longer, so, hello. 🙂 

Need more ideas? To shake up your chats even more, try playing the Question Game, built directly into the Bumble app. 

Above all, remember that regardless of how carefully crafted your first message may be, some people still may not respond. Dating takes effort from both parties, and no matter how many tries it takes, you deserve the type of relationship you want!

Get on Bumble

When online dating – as with meeting people in real life – the first impression is everything.

Unlike real-life meets, though, you can’t get away with flirty glances and smiles on an app; it all hangs on your opening line.

If you’ve been on the apps for a while, you’ll have heard the cheesy ‘did it hurt when you fell from heaven?’ chat-ups – and while these may have worked for our parents, they’re now somewhat played out.

Asking someone questions about their profile is always a good way to start, as it shows them you’ve actually looked and aren’t going for stock openers.

Perhaps your match enjoys the same video game or music as you, or has been to somewhere you’ve also travelled. These are all great entry points.

In cases where their profile is a little sparse, or if you don’t share their hobbies, you’ll need to get a little more creative.

With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, we’ve created a master list to give you some ideas, with 40 all-purpose opening messages to catch their attention and get the conversation flowing.

40 funny and flirty opening lines to use on dating apps

From the flirty to the silly, here are plenty of jumping-off points for chatting more… and potentially a love connection:

1. Which song would you choose as the soundtrack for your life?
2. Tell me two truths and a lie about you and I’ll try to guess which one’s fake.
3. What’s your most controversial opinion?
4. Tell me about your perfect Sunday…
5. I want to hear your finest dad joke! Make me laugh/cringe, the cornier the better.
6. You look just like [celebrity they look like]. Do you hear that all the time?
7. Choose our date: A movie, boozy night out, or hiking?
8. Help me choose what to make for dinner? I’ll buy you breakfast after our date in return…
9. [Along with a dog/cat gif] Cat or dog person? Your response is required to determine whether we’re a match.
10. Before we get chatting, I want you to know I’ll never send you unsolicited dick pics. Duck pics, though, I can’t promise anything [send picture of a duck].
11. You’ve travelled loads! Where’s the best place you’ve been?
12. Using only emojis, tell me your life story.
13. If I made you dinner, what’s a meal that’d make you fall in love with me?
14. How long have you lived in [city]? What’s your favourite restaurant/bar/day out here?
15. [If they live in the same city as you] Hey, you’re not far from me! Have you ever tried restaurant/bar/day out?
16. Favourite comedian, actor, and singer? Go!
17. You had me at [something in their profile that made them stand out]…
18. What’s the worst opening line you’ve ever received, or is it this message?
19. You just won a million pounds, what’s the first thing you do?
20. What will we tell our grandchildren when they ask how we met?
21. [If they have a pet in their pictures] You have the most beautiful fur and whiskers I’ve ever seen, and your human is pretty cute too.
22. What made you swipe right on me?
23. I’m a [star sign], does that mean we’re compatible?
24. I bet you a tenner we’d have a great date.
25. I had a great opening line ready, but you’re so hot I’ve forgotten it.
26. I’m using my last 2% battery to send you this message. If that’s not commitment, I don’t know what is.
27. You’re a [film/movie/show on their profile] fan right? What do you think of the newest release?
28. What are your thoughts on pineapple on pizza?
29. I saw you also like [hobby] and couldn’t not swipe right! How did you get into it?
30. Who would you rather be stuck in a lift with? [List two celebs]
31. I bet you a drink your personality is even better than your looks.
32. The 10th picture back in your camera roll describes our relationship. What’s the prognosis?
33. What’s your usual McDonald’s/Greggs/KFC order?
34. I’m vaxxed, waxed, and ready for a date. Where are we going?
35. Please tell me you’re not the type of person who claps when the plane lands…
36. Were Ross and Rachel really on a break?
37. Do you like bad boys/girls? Because I’m really bad at this.
38. Your [a quality about them] really caught my eye. You’re stunning!
39. I’d tell you you’re gorgeous, but I’m sure you get that all the time. How about you describe yourself with a gif instead?
40. There’s not much on your bio but I’d love to get to know you. Quickfire question round?

Remember, you’ll always do better with something personalised rather than a generic quote. Even just asking someone out can be effective, depending on who it is.

As long as it’s considerate – not a boring ‘hi’ – you’re already on to a winner.

Let’s hope some of these lines help you on your way to finding a genuine connection with someone special.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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Dating in the pandemic is... weird, to put it mildly. With IRL dates pretty much off the table during quarantine, more and more of us have been relying solely on dating apps like Tinder and Hinge for conversation and companionship. But even that comes with its own challenges.

According to a recent study, half of American singles aren't looking for a relationship or even a date right now, and aren't "on the market." Which in one way is kind of encouraging for those of us who are on The Apps, as the people we're messaging are open to making a connection. It also means that the dating app ecosystem in general is more competitive.

Making a good first impression by crafting the perfect opening line could be the thing that helps you stand out from all the other guys who are blanket-bombing women's Tinder profiles with emojis or "'sup."

"Open with a line that shows them that you’ve taken the time to look through their profile," says sexologist and We-Vibe sex expert, Dr. Jess O’Reilly, PhD. "Try to demonstrate that you’re not just copying and pasting a generic Hi. I think you’re cute. Wanna chat? message. For example, if they say they’re into hiking and they’ve posted a few mountaintop pics, ask them about this specific interest. Hey! Love your hiking pics. Is that Valley of Fire? I’ve always wanted to visit. Anyhow, let me know if you’re up for chatting today? That last part leaves it open for them to consent. Rather than assuming that you’re entitled to their time, ask if they’re in the mood. If they say they’re busy, ask if they want to continue the conversation and if they don’t, move along."

Gigi Engle, certified sexologist and author of All The F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life, believes that the best way to get someone interested is to "either be goofy or really thoughtful," and much like O'Reilly, recommends paying attention to somebody's profile in order to be more specific in your opening gambit. She adds that composing an original, attention-grabbing message is also worthwhile even if you're looking for something a little more casual.

"In the event that you're kind of mass-messaging hotties, which let's face it, we've all done, I think asking a really unusual question can really spark someone's interest and also immediately weeds out anyone who isn't clever or doesn't have a sense of humor," she says. "For instance: If you had to choose a favorite berry, which berry would you choose? or What is one secret-single thing you do when no one is around. I'll go first: I watch Brooklyn Nine-Nine reruns and look at puppy memes. Go!"

So there's your advice from the professionals. Show that you've been paying attention and that you're curious to learn more, without coming across as demanding and entitled, or alternatively, cut loose and just have fun with your messages (which does not mean unsolicited sexual remarks).

Still in need of some inspiration? Some women shared the best messages they ever received on dating apps. It bears repeating that context is everything, but who knows. Maybe one of these will work for you too.

“The best opening like I've ever heard was: 'I’m bad at this, so I’m going to buck the Tinder trend and let you make the first move, if that’s okay.'” —Ann, 29.

“I once had a guy first message me first with, ‘Corny pick-up line, gif, or being asked out?’ It was clear he was referencing his opening line, but being the obnoxious person I am, I replied, ‘All of them.’ He then did all of them. He sent me a cute gif, came up with a corny pick-up line, and asked if I wanted to grab drinks next Friday. I liked the fact [that] he was able to come up with all three, but also, in asking how he should start the convo, it acknowledges the fact that opening lines are weird for both the girl and the guy.” —Hayley 29.

“I always like when men begin with two questions. Not just any questions—questions specific to my profile. I like when they show they’ve looked past my pictures and are taking an interest in the things I have said. I prefer two questions because if I don’t want to answer one, I have a second option.” —Brooke, 30

“In college when I was on Tinder, I had in my bio that I was a philosophy major. This one guy managed to make puns using Plato, Kant, Descartes, and Spinoza in his opening line. I really appreciated the effort.” —Rose, 24

“The most important part, for me, is that a guy opts for my profile over my pictures. Yes, we all put up pictures that make us look attractive, but hopefully you’re looking to actually talk to me, as well. Any attempt at personalization is awesome. Steer clear of the pet names.” —Lauren, 28

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“My favorite opening line probably has to be a compliment. Not a sexual one, but one that shows I caught their attention in some way. Yes, it can be about my pictures and appearance, but nothing derogatory or implying that I’m getting naked for you.” —Sally, 32

“One guy told me an entire story about our potential first date using only emojis. On the one hand, it showed he had a lot of time on his hand, but on the other it made me smile and showed he was creative and had a sense of humor.” —Gabby, 30

“I like keeping it light, but also practical. Ask me something random, like ‘Hawaiian or pepperoni?’ And then buy me pizza.” —Susan, 31

“Tinder is a hellscape most of the time. I don’t want to see the word 'hey.' I want to see that you’ve read what I wrote in my bio and are present enough to ask me about it. It makes you stand out from the crowd. We ladies get plenty of weird pick up lines from random dudes. It may seem like a low bar, but paying attention to detail goes a really long way. If she’s hiking with her best friend in one of her photos, tell her how fun the hike looked. Ask if she goes hiking often. It will help you in the long run.” —Jasmine, 29

“I respond to guys who are sincerely nice, not meaning ones who refer to themselves as nice. That’s a huge red flag. I like a guy who tells me details about his life and passions right away. Showing you’re not scared to open up about things in your life shows that you’re not a huge tool bag, but someone worth getting to know. Just remember, tell the truth. We always know when you’re lying!” —Gabby, 27

"They messaged me, 'Remind me to never challenge you to an arm wrestling contest, Muscles.' It was the perfect mix of complimentary and flirty. I also about died when they called me Muscles.” —Gabrielle, 26

"A guy messaged me, 'Would it be romantic if I wore a turban that matches your hair if we go out?" I honestly thought that was so cute. My hair is bright green, for context." —Lo, 25.

"He said, 'You have one of those smiles that make me smile just looking at you. Thank you for brightening up my day.'" —Charolette, 33

"He accurately guessed the tattoo artist who gave me the flower tattoo on my arm. I was in shock." —Alyson, 24

"The guy I'm dating now didn't really say anything exceptional. He asked what I was reading—it says I'm a bibliophile in my bio—and he happened to have read the book already. So we spoke about that!" —Emma, 28

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Looking for some of the best opening lines for online dating sites and apps?

The online dating world is competitive, especially for men. That’s why it’s important that you grab a girl’s attention fast. Besides setting up a killer profile, you need to have some great online dating openers ready to intrigue her. 

During my 100-date experiment, I analyzed thousands of dating profiles. When you deliver awesome opening lines for online dating sites and apps, your chances of connecting with quality women increase greatly.

On the other hand, when your online dating openers fall flat, you’re basically guaranteed a hard left swipe.

But don’t worry. I’m here to help. Below, I have listed 31 of the top opening lines for online dating sites and apps. I’ve used my expertise to create these lines so that you don’t have to stress about it. And to keep you on track, I am also including an explanation on why certain lines work.

However, before we get into that, I’d be remiss if I didn’t offer some examples of what I consider the worst online dating openers. Avoid using these types of lines at all costs:

• Anything explicitly sexual

• “DTF?” NO!

• Snarky comments

• Negative openers. Women want positivity, so exude that in your messages

• TMI. No one needs to hear about how crazy your ex-girlfriend is or how alimony has been a real b**ch since your divorce. Save super personal stuff for if you get to a third date.

• “Hey,” “Hello,” or “How are you?” While these are certainly benign, playing it safe doesn’t mean you’re being strategic. Don’t open with something generic or boring.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, onto the…..

30 Best Opening Lines for Online Dating and Dating Apps

#1: Ask her a question about a passion of hers….

Take a good look at the question my test user sent to a Facebook Dating user in the above screenshot. It reads: “how would you end homelessness?”

Then see this woman’s 15 line response!!

Boom, a huge success. Here’s some reasons why my test user’s opening line is so powerful: 

• He asked a question and ended with a ?.

• The question is about something the female user is passionate about. 

• The female user realized my test user took time to read her bio. 

Guys, the clients of mine who have the most success always take the time to at least scan dating profiles of women who they’re interested in. They look for commonalities to try and create an emotional response. That’s the goal.

Now scroll through the below questions. Don’t just pick out a question and send at random.

If you see that a woman is super active, then send her question #3. If you see that she loves dogs, send her question #6. You’re always welcome to customize the below lines. 

#2: “Serious question for you. Best discovery — avocados or Amazon?”

This line is an example of either/or questions. I love using these types of openers because it’s fun and prompts an interesting conversation. Also, this example offers a dash of humor. Whenever you can insert something witty, do so.

Line #3: “Which do you like better, hiking or biking?”

This is another example of an either/or question. However, the strategy here isn’t to break the ice by making her laugh. If she lists that she likes being active (hence the hiking or biking question), ask her what activity she likes best.

When you find out, you can craft a compelling date idea based on her answer.

Line #4: “If you were a fruit, you would be a fine-apple. Correction: An organic fine-apple.”

Now, you really need to gauge a woman’s sense of humor before going the cheesy pickup line route. This is one of the many reasons I encourage guys to read a woman’s complete profile before messaging her. Her profile is basically a guidebook on what types of things would be good to mention in an opening line and continued messages. Moreover, her listed interests are what you should use to plan the first date with her.

If she comes off as quirky and seems like the type that would chuckle over this type of line go for it. This type of opening line would work especially well if you meet her on Green Singles or if her profile indicates that she is very health-conscious.

Line #5: “Do you read Dr. Seuss? Because Green Eggs and DAMMMNNN!”

Like the third line, this is one that can be successful if she seems like someone who would enjoy this type of humor.

Line#6: “Question: Big dogs, little dogs, or this dog?”

In this opening line example, you would then post a picture of your adorable dog (or a friend’s) to compel her to respond. Cute animals are always a win.

Line #7: “Capo’s is where it’s at. Have you ever been to Grinders?”

If you live in San Francisco, you may be familiar with Capo’s. It’s an awesome place that serves Chicago-style pizza. Grinders is another place that serves deep dish pizza.

This example is drawing from something a woman listed as an interest in her profile and asking an open-ended question. You don’t have to use Capo’s, obviously, when you message a girl. But everyone loves to eat, so if she has a food-based interest in her profile, run with it.

Line #8: “Before we get to know each other, I just need to put it out there that I will kill all the spiders for you.”

No one wants to be caught alone in a room with a spider. Knowing you would be her knight in shining armor is a great and playful way to open*.

*Note: Don’t use this line if she has a pet tarantula.

Line #9: Don’t Use a Line, Just This Gif

When in doubt, gifs can make great opening lines on dating sites and apps.

Line #10: “So I guess this means we’re exclusive now, right? ;)”

This is a great way to flirt and be playful in your opener.

Line #11: “Anchorman was a great one — a classic, really. So what do we think about the sequel? Yay or nay?”

You don’t have to mention Anchorman, but any comment you can make regarding a movie or TV show she likes is a good icebreaker.

Line #12: “I love [insert comedian she likes here]! Have you seen [insert similar comedian here] do standup? He’s pretty rad as well.

Line #13: “You look like you could make any outfit work, but that cold shoulder just doesn’t suit you.”

This isn’t so much an opening line as it is a good response if you get radio silence back. I suggest always trying to overcome an objection a couple times before moving on.

Line #14: “Favorite comedian, actor, and singer? Go!”

This is another way to build rapport by finding shared interests.

Line #15: “I just want to let you know straight away that I don’t send unsolicited dick picks. I do send unsolicited duck pics.”

Line #16: “I don’t mean to brag but I happen to be very good at opening jars.”

Like killing spiders, this is something that will never go unappreciated.

Opening Line #17: “I hear you like bad boys. I’m bad at everything.”

Line #18: “That’s awesome that you’re into [insert famous artist here]. There’s actually an exhibit on him this Saturday if you’re interested.”

Once again, I’m throwing in an “art” thing for the sake of an example. But you can use anything as long as it’s based on an interest listed in her profile.

When you hone in on an interest, use this to move toward a TDL. A TDL is what we here at EmLovz refer to as a date’s call-to-action. It stands for Time, Date, and Location.

Don’t wait too long during an online dating conversation to ask a woamn on a date that is based on her interests and offers a specific TDL. Doing this will make it way more likely for her to agree. Women, in general, like it when a man initiates things as far as a first date goes. If you cut to the chase and have a cool date idea ready, she will probably find it very refreshing and be more compelled to meet you.

Line #19: “You had me at cold cuts.”

This is assuming a girl said she loved cold cuts. But really you can use the “You had me at…” for anything and just insert an interest.

Line #20: “I’ll binge watch [insert show she loves here] with you anytime.”

Line #21: “Has anyone ever told you that you look like [insert actress/famous person she resembles here]? Only that you’re a lot better looking?”

Line #22: “I will brunch so hard with you if you let me.”

Women. Love. Brunch.

Line #23: “Do you think it’s strange when men say they’re fans of The Bachelor? And can you tell that this is my way of telling you I’m a fan of The Bachelor?

Don’t be shy about your love of #BachelorNation. We’re always looking for someone new to join the viewing party.

Line #24: “If you were stranded on a desert island, what is the one thing you would have to have with you?”

Line #25: “Typical us, right? Me writing you messages and you not responding?”

This is a cheeky way to message her if she’s gone radio silent on you. Remember, you need to try to overcome her objection two times before moving on. So if she doesn’t respond to this line, follow up with…

Line #26: “I’m at [insert number here]. Give me a call if you want me to take you to get the best deep dish pizza you’ve ever had ;)”

Line #25: “When is the last time you sang to yourself or to someone else?”

Line #27: “You’re cute, but are you friendly?”

This is another playful line that can lead to some fun, flirty banter.

Line #28: “What are you most proud of in life, but never have a chance to share with other people?”

Don’t be afraid to dive a little deep. You don’t want to get overly personal, but a question like this can be a great way to allow you both to open up. Before things go too far, find a good point to ask a date using a TDL and you can continue these types of conversations face-to-face.

Line #29: “Are you a morning person or a night owl?”

Hey man, commonalities matter. What if you move in to a small 1 bedroom apartment with said girl and she’s up until 3 am while you gotta get up at 6am for work? 

Line #30: “Let’s just skip to the important stuff. Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera?”

If her dating profile has concert pics this may be a good line to get a laugh out of her. 

Line #31: “Should we talk for a while or do you want to just cut to the part where I take you out on the best date you’ve ever had?”

This may be a great line for my east coasters out there. 

Line #32: “Molly, will you accept this rose? 

What woman doesn’t love The Bachelor and want to be swooped up by Prince Charming? 

Want More Opening Lines for Online Dating Sites and Apps?

If this list wasn’t enough for you, make sure to checkout a couple other articles of mine that are similar….

I also provide personalized coaching services via Skype. If this is more your style, then head over to my calendar and book a 1-on-1 session with me today. 

During our introductory session, we will come up with a dating action plan that is tailored to your personality, concerns, and needs. We’ll also discuss my 3 month coaching program to see if it’s a fit for you.

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Best opening lines for online dating messages

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Best online dating pick up lines

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"Hey." Surprisingly, of all the dating app opening lines you can try, this one is thought by many to be an effective way of intriguing another humanoid enough to provoke a meeting. I sometimes wonder what people who think things like "hey" "hi" or "what's up?" are good opening lines are trying to get across. Are they attempting to convey how supremely chill they are? That they are so busy living life to the max that they simply haven't got the time to be charming? Or maybe they've just managed to convince themselves that their profile is so awesome that it speaks for itself.

What I do know is that a mono or disyllabic opening lines like those listed above are highly unlikely to get a response. I know that because this was one of the findings discovered by dating app Hinge when it conducted a month-long study, analyzing data from its users. We've taken some other learnings that have turned up since dating apps became a thing, mixed in some expert opinion and a little common sense, and came up with the best opening lines that will ensure you score an IRL date. Trust us: these good opening lines are far less banal and far more likely to result in you having an honest-to-goodness interaction with a special someone. And for more great dating tips, check out the 7 ways to reignite your romance in your 40s.

In their 2015 online dating study published in Evidence-Based Medicine researchers Khalid Khan and Sameer Chaudhry noted that: "People almost always see themselves as unique." That means that people are more likely to have react positively when an opening message picks up on one of the more remarkable factoids stashed in their profile. Pick up on what they're putting down and use it as a jumping off point. Here are two great examples:

1. I don't think I've ever met an ambidextrous person before. How does that come in useful?

2. Three passports! How did you get to be so international?

There's place for sarcasm, acerbic wit, and self-deprecating humor, but your opening message ain't it. It's hard to read feelings and tone in text even with people you already know, so understanding the nuance in a note from a perfect stranger is a tall order. If you really want to convey that you have a dark soul, leave easter eggs in your profile—a penchant for the books of Jean-Paul Sartre, the films of Ingmar Bergman, the music of Morrissey—and keep your opening message upbeat. Here are two great examples:

3. Looks like blue skies all weekend. How are you planning to take advantage of the sunshine?ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb

4. I'm going camping with my bestie next month. What fun stuff have you got coming up?

To make your online dating game even stronger, you should learn the 20 Things She Always Wants You To Say.

He or she already knows that you find them attractive by virtue of the fact that you're messaging them, so table your remarks about looks, not least because a lot of people—particularly women—are turned off by messages that focus on their appearance. "We're tired of getting messages from people who compliment our looks, but have nothing to say about the rest of our profiles." says Em Hammel of MenAskEm "Those messages are shallow and meaningless."

If you want a good opening line, hone in on something that's unconnected to how they look. There's no need to write an essay here. "One short, positive remark, directly addressing the person's character or photo, will do," say Khan and Chaudry. Here are two great examples:

5. Looks like you have an awesome circle of friends! What do they like about you the most?

6. Sounds as though you're a very discerning reader. I need to read a life-altering book. Could you suggest something mind-blowing?

There's a reason that creators of dating apps are so keen for you to write lists of the things you like. They know that having a common interest is a great way to break the ice in a positive way. One of the best opening lines is to start with a shared interest in a movie, book, or activity they mention. If you've always wanted to visit some place they've posted a picture of, take this opportunity to tell them. Bonus points if you can include an insider reference that demonstrates that you know what you're talking about. Here are two great examples of good opening lines:

7. I went to Ibiza back in '07! I loved hanging out at the Blue Marlin. What were some of your highlights?

8. I love Shaun of the Dead too! How do you rate the rest of the Cornetto Trilogy?

And when you finally score that first date, check these 40 Irresistible First Date Ideas.

By now you should have noticed that all of the good opening lines we've suggested are questions. What's more, they are question that require more than a "yes" or "no" in the way of an answer. That's because the name of the game is to get someone to open up little and potentially establish a rapport.  A common complaint harbored by people we spoke to was that opening messages didn't convey an interest in getting to know the recipient. You can prove you're more evolved than this by asking someone about their life, their passions, their job, and their her interests before inviting them on a date. "This kind of conversation is really flattering." says Em. "It's nice when someone is actually interested in who we are, and not just what we look like." Here are three great examples:

9. What motivates you to get up in the morning?

10. What subject do you like to talk about for hours on end?

11. Your ideal life in 5 years time. What does it look like?

Asking questions about a person's life can result in some interesting tidbits of information, factoids you can build on. Another tactic for a playful and possibly revealing exchange is  is to engage someone by asking hypothetical questions, posing dilemmas or inviting them to play a game. And of course, you can always go for these 12 Ways to Spice Up Your Relationship With Your Phone. Here are three great ways to engage:

12. Tell me two truths and a lie about yourself!

13. You're given a million dollars but have to spend it all in a day and have nothing to show for it by the end. What does that day look like?

14. Describe yourself in five emojis!

In an article for Psychology Today, Gil Greengross, Ph.D., writes: "Humor is one of the clearest markers of a successful social interaction. You can use it as an icebreaker, and sharing a laugh with others is a good sign that you've hit it off. Humor might be even more important in dating, where it reveals something about you or your potential partner's intelligence, and also signals mate quality." Here are three great ways to put that into practice:

15. I don't know who'd be more excited about us going on a date, me or my mom.

16. I liked what you wrote about getting sloppily written messages. Good grammar and proper spelling is real impotent to me, too. 

Dating app Zoosk created a data-backed infographic on writing good messages that suggests users use flirty words like "crush" and "trouble". While it's wise to not go overboard at first, there's nothing wrong with showing that a someone has an effect on you. Try this:

18. I'm still single, in case you were wondering. You?

One of the most interesting things turned up by Hinge's data analysis was the sorts of messages that men and women are more likely to respond to. They found that women are 40 percent more likely to reply to a message regarding food or culinary trends whereas men like to receive direct, assertive messages. They are a whopping 98 percent more likely to respond to invitations. If you can turn these findings into a question, you'll have dramatically increased your chances of getting a response. Here are two surefire strategies:

19. I see that you're a ramen aficionado. What's your favorite spot in the city? (To a woman)

20. Free this week? (To a man)

For more advice on living your best life, follow us on Facebook now!

Looking for some of the best opening lines for online dating sites and apps?

The online dating world is competitive, especially for men. That’s why it’s important that you grab a girl’s attention fast. Besides setting up a killer profile, you need to have some great online dating openers ready to intrigue her. 

During my 100-date experiment, I analyzed thousands of dating profiles. When you deliver awesome opening lines for online dating sites and apps, your chances of connecting with quality women increase greatly.

On the other hand, when your online dating openers fall flat, you’re basically guaranteed a hard left swipe.

But don’t worry. I’m here to help. Below, I have listed 31 of the top opening lines for online dating sites and apps. I’ve used my expertise to create these lines so that you don’t have to stress about it. And to keep you on track, I am also including an explanation on why certain lines work.

However, before we get into that, I’d be remiss if I didn’t offer some examples of what I consider the worst online dating openers. Avoid using these types of lines at all costs:

• Anything explicitly sexual

• “DTF?” NO!

• Snarky comments

• Negative openers. Women want positivity, so exude that in your messages

• TMI. No one needs to hear about how crazy your ex-girlfriend is or how alimony has been a real b**ch since your divorce. Save super personal stuff for if you get to a third date.

• “Hey,” “Hello,” or “How are you?” While these are certainly benign, playing it safe doesn’t mean you’re being strategic. Don’t open with something generic or boring.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, onto the…..

30 Best Opening Lines for Online Dating and Dating Apps

#1: Ask her a question about a passion of hers….

Take a good look at the question my test user sent to a Facebook Dating user in the above screenshot. It reads: “how would you end homelessness?”

Then see this woman’s 15 line response!!

Boom, a huge success. Here’s some reasons why my test user’s opening line is so powerful: 

• He asked a question and ended with a ?.

• The question is about something the female user is passionate about. 

• The female user realized my test user took time to read her bio. 

Guys, the clients of mine who have the most success always take the time to at least scan dating profiles of women who they’re interested in. They look for commonalities to try and create an emotional response. That’s the goal.

Now scroll through the below questions. Don’t just pick out a question and send at random.

If you see that a woman is super active, then send her question #3. If you see that she loves dogs, send her question #6. You’re always welcome to customize the below lines. 

#2: “Serious question for you. Best discovery — avocados or Amazon?”

This line is an example of either/or questions. I love using these types of openers because it’s fun and prompts an interesting conversation. Also, this example offers a dash of humor. Whenever you can insert something witty, do so.

Line #3: “Which do you like better, hiking or biking?”

This is another example of an either/or question. However, the strategy here isn’t to break the ice by making her laugh. If she lists that she likes being active (hence the hiking or biking question), ask her what activity she likes best.

When you find out, you can craft a compelling date idea based on her answer.

Line #4: “If you were a fruit, you would be a fine-apple. Correction: An organic fine-apple.”

Now, you really need to gauge a woman’s sense of humor before going the cheesy pickup line route. This is one of the many reasons I encourage guys to read a woman’s complete profile before messaging her. Her profile is basically a guidebook on what types of things would be good to mention in an opening line and continued messages. Moreover, her listed interests are what you should use to plan the first date with her.

If she comes off as quirky and seems like the type that would chuckle over this type of line go for it. This type of opening line would work especially well if you meet her on Green Singles or if her profile indicates that she is very health-conscious.

Line #5: “Do you read Dr. Seuss? Because Green Eggs and DAMMMNNN!”

Like the third line, this is one that can be successful if she seems like someone who would enjoy this type of humor.

Line#6: “Question: Big dogs, little dogs, or this dog?”

In this opening line example, you would then post a picture of your adorable dog (or a friend’s) to compel her to respond. Cute animals are always a win.

Line #7: “Capo’s is where it’s at. Have you ever been to Grinders?”

If you live in San Francisco, you may be familiar with Capo’s. It’s an awesome place that serves Chicago-style pizza. Grinders is another place that serves deep dish pizza.

This example is drawing from something a woman listed as an interest in her profile and asking an open-ended question. You don’t have to use Capo’s, obviously, when you message a girl. But everyone loves to eat, so if she has a food-based interest in her profile, run with it.

Line #8: “Before we get to know each other, I just need to put it out there that I will kill all the spiders for you.”

No one wants to be caught alone in a room with a spider. Knowing you would be her knight in shining armor is a great and playful way to open*.

*Note: Don’t use this line if she has a pet tarantula.

Line #9: Don’t Use a Line, Just This Gif

When in doubt, gifs can make great opening lines on dating sites and apps.

Line #10: “So I guess this means we’re exclusive now, right? ;)”

This is a great way to flirt and be playful in your opener.

Line #11: “Anchorman was a great one — a classic, really. So what do we think about the sequel? Yay or nay?”

You don’t have to mention Anchorman, but any comment you can make regarding a movie or TV show she likes is a good icebreaker.

Line #12: “I love [insert comedian she likes here]! Have you seen [insert similar comedian here] do standup? He’s pretty rad as well.

Line #13: “You look like you could make any outfit work, but that cold shoulder just doesn’t suit you.”

This isn’t so much an opening line as it is a good response if you get radio silence back. I suggest always trying to overcome an objection a couple times before moving on.

Line #14: “Favorite comedian, actor, and singer? Go!”

This is another way to build rapport by finding shared interests.

Line #15: “I just want to let you know straight away that I don’t send unsolicited dick picks. I do send unsolicited duck pics.”

Line #16: “I don’t mean to brag but I happen to be very good at opening jars.”

Like killing spiders, this is something that will never go unappreciated.

Opening Line #17: “I hear you like bad boys. I’m bad at everything.”

Line #18: “That’s awesome that you’re into [insert famous artist here]. There’s actually an exhibit on him this Saturday if you’re interested.”

Once again, I’m throwing in an “art” thing for the sake of an example. But you can use anything as long as it’s based on an interest listed in her profile.

When you hone in on an interest, use this to move toward a TDL. A TDL is what we here at EmLovz refer to as a date’s call-to-action. It stands for Time, Date, and Location.

Don’t wait too long during an online dating conversation to ask a woamn on a date that is based on her interests and offers a specific TDL. Doing this will make it way more likely for her to agree. Women, in general, like it when a man initiates things as far as a first date goes. If you cut to the chase and have a cool date idea ready, she will probably find it very refreshing and be more compelled to meet you.

Line #19: “You had me at cold cuts.”

This is assuming a girl said she loved cold cuts. But really you can use the “You had me at…” for anything and just insert an interest.

Line #20: “I’ll binge watch [insert show she loves here] with you anytime.”

Line #21: “Has anyone ever told you that you look like [insert actress/famous person she resembles here]? Only that you’re a lot better looking?”

Line #22: “I will brunch so hard with you if you let me.”

Women. Love. Brunch.

Line #23: “Do you think it’s strange when men say they’re fans of The Bachelor? And can you tell that this is my way of telling you I’m a fan of The Bachelor?

Don’t be shy about your love of #BachelorNation. We’re always looking for someone new to join the viewing party.

Line #24: “If you were stranded on a desert island, what is the one thing you would have to have with you?”

Line #25: “Typical us, right? Me writing you messages and you not responding?”

This is a cheeky way to message her if she’s gone radio silent on you. Remember, you need to try to overcome her objection two times before moving on. So if she doesn’t respond to this line, follow up with…

Line #26: “I’m at [insert number here]. Give me a call if you want me to take you to get the best deep dish pizza you’ve ever had ;)”

Line #25: “When is the last time you sang to yourself or to someone else?”

Line #27: “You’re cute, but are you friendly?”

This is another playful line that can lead to some fun, flirty banter.

Line #28: “What are you most proud of in life, but never have a chance to share with other people?”

Don’t be afraid to dive a little deep. You don’t want to get overly personal, but a question like this can be a great way to allow you both to open up. Before things go too far, find a good point to ask a date using a TDL and you can continue these types of conversations face-to-face.

Line #29: “Are you a morning person or a night owl?”

Hey man, commonalities matter. What if you move in to a small 1 bedroom apartment with said girl and she’s up until 3 am while you gotta get up at 6am for work? 

Line #30: “Let’s just skip to the important stuff. Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera?”

If her dating profile has concert pics this may be a good line to get a laugh out of her. 

Line #31: “Should we talk for a while or do you want to just cut to the part where I take you out on the best date you’ve ever had?”

This may be a great line for my east coasters out there. 

Line #32: “Molly, will you accept this rose? 

What woman doesn’t love The Bachelor and want to be swooped up by Prince Charming? 

Want More Opening Lines for Online Dating Sites and Apps?

If this list wasn’t enough for you, make sure to checkout a couple other articles of mine that are similar….

I also provide personalized coaching services via Skype. If this is more your style, then head over to my calendar and book a 1-on-1 session with me today. 

During our introductory session, we will come up with a dating action plan that is tailored to your personality, concerns, and needs. We’ll also discuss my 3 month coaching program to see if it’s a fit for you.

© 2022 LoveToKnow Media. All rights reserved.

When online dating – as with meeting people in real life – the first impression is everything.

Unlike real-life meets, though, you can’t get away with flirty glances and smiles on an app; it all hangs on your opening line.

If you’ve been on the apps for a while, you’ll have heard the cheesy ‘did it hurt when you fell from heaven?’ chat-ups – and while these may have worked for our parents, they’re now somewhat played out.

Asking someone questions about their profile is always a good way to start, as it shows them you’ve actually looked and aren’t going for stock openers.

Perhaps your match enjoys the same video game or music as you, or has been to somewhere you’ve also travelled. These are all great entry points.

In cases where their profile is a little sparse, or if you don’t share their hobbies, you’ll need to get a little more creative.

With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, we’ve created a master list to give you some ideas, with 40 all-purpose opening messages to catch their attention and get the conversation flowing.

40 funny and flirty opening lines to use on dating apps

From the flirty to the silly, here are plenty of jumping-off points for chatting more… and potentially a love connection:

1. Which song would you choose as the soundtrack for your life?
2. Tell me two truths and a lie about you and I’ll try to guess which one’s fake.
3. What’s your most controversial opinion?
4. Tell me about your perfect Sunday…
5. I want to hear your finest dad joke! Make me laugh/cringe, the cornier the better.
6. You look just like [celebrity they look like]. Do you hear that all the time?
7. Choose our date: A movie, boozy night out, or hiking?
8. Help me choose what to make for dinner? I’ll buy you breakfast after our date in return…
9. [Along with a dog/cat gif] Cat or dog person? Your response is required to determine whether we’re a match.
10. Before we get chatting, I want you to know I’ll never send you unsolicited dick pics. Duck pics, though, I can’t promise anything [send picture of a duck].
11. You’ve travelled loads! Where’s the best place you’ve been?
12. Using only emojis, tell me your life story.
13. If I made you dinner, what’s a meal that’d make you fall in love with me?
14. How long have you lived in [city]? What’s your favourite restaurant/bar/day out here?
15. [If they live in the same city as you] Hey, you’re not far from me! Have you ever tried restaurant/bar/day out?
16. Favourite comedian, actor, and singer? Go!
17. You had me at [something in their profile that made them stand out]…
18. What’s the worst opening line you’ve ever received, or is it this message?
19. You just won a million pounds, what’s the first thing you do?
20. What will we tell our grandchildren when they ask how we met?
21. [If they have a pet in their pictures] You have the most beautiful fur and whiskers I’ve ever seen, and your human is pretty cute too.
22. What made you swipe right on me?
23. I’m a [star sign], does that mean we’re compatible?
24. I bet you a tenner we’d have a great date.
25. I had a great opening line ready, but you’re so hot I’ve forgotten it.
26. I’m using my last 2% battery to send you this message. If that’s not commitment, I don’t know what is.
27. You’re a [film/movie/show on their profile] fan right? What do you think of the newest release?
28. What are your thoughts on pineapple on pizza?
29. I saw you also like [hobby] and couldn’t not swipe right! How did you get into it?
30. Who would you rather be stuck in a lift with? [List two celebs]
31. I bet you a drink your personality is even better than your looks.
32. The 10th picture back in your camera roll describes our relationship. What’s the prognosis?
33. What’s your usual McDonald’s/Greggs/KFC order?
34. I’m vaxxed, waxed, and ready for a date. Where are we going?
35. Please tell me you’re not the type of person who claps when the plane lands…
36. Were Ross and Rachel really on a break?
37. Do you like bad boys/girls? Because I’m really bad at this.
38. Your [a quality about them] really caught my eye. You’re stunning!
39. I’d tell you you’re gorgeous, but I’m sure you get that all the time. How about you describe yourself with a gif instead?
40. There’s not much on your bio but I’d love to get to know you. Quickfire question round?

Remember, you’ll always do better with something personalised rather than a generic quote. Even just asking someone out can be effective, depending on who it is.

As long as it’s considerate – not a boring ‘hi’ – you’re already on to a winner.

Let’s hope some of these lines help you on your way to finding a genuine connection with someone special.

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Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

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“How you doin'” may have worked like a charm for Joey Tribbiani, but opening lines today, especially on a dating app, require a little more thought and originality to get you noticed.

“Opening lines, like first impressions, are really important — especially on dating apps or online-only contact — because people are so busy and so inundated with other responses,” says April Masini, a New York-based relationship and etiquette expert and author. “An opening line can make it or break it when you’re looking to date.”

WATCH BELOW: To catch a catfish: Why do people create fake online dating profiles?

To catch a catfish: Why do people create fake online dating profiles?

Masini says to avoid opening with a sarcastic remark, as it’s too easily misinterpreted and to skip the sexual innuendo.

“Even if the person is in a bathing suit, avoid any opening line that mentions their body parts. They know they’re hot, that’s why they posted the photo they did. They want to know that you think they’re hot and datable,” she says.

The other reason why you should stay away from pointing out their sexiness is that it’s a given: “You wouldn’t be messaging them if you didn’t think they were hot,” says Toronto-based celebrity matchmaker and online dating expert, Carmelia Ray.

There are a number of tactics you can take with your opening line that will get someone’s attention, but above all else, Ray says, use that line on someone you’re truly compatible with.

“Do not message people if you’re blindly swiping left and right,” she says. “Read their profile and determine if you’re genuinely a match. Otherwise, you’re just wasting your time.”

These are some top tips from the experts on how to craft an opening line that will get a response on your dating apps.

#1 Give a little

“You’d be surprised how many people don’t give genuine compliments because they’re afraid of rejection,” Masini says. Go for something specific and genuine that shows you’ve really read their profile or noticed something about them that wouldn’t be obvious to everyone.

READ MORE: 5 signs you’re falling out of love

Terran Shea, a Toronto-based matchmaker and date coach, says the keywords with a compliment are “tasteful” and “specific.” She advises personalizing the compliment as much as possible, and if you’re going to reference a celebrity or something from pop culture, be vague. It’ll force the person to Google the reference and then you’ll be on their mind.

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Suggested lines: “You look like someone I could take home to my mom and whisk away for a romantic weekend”; “My friends would be jealous if you went out with me”; “Has anyone ever told you that you look like [fill in name of obscure actor/actress].”

#2 Be funny

Admittedly, this isn’t the right approach for everyone, but if you can strike the right chord, humour is almost always a winning trait.

Masini says not to go too dark or shoot for “slip on a banana peel” humour: “Aim for charm and chuckle.” While Shea says if the person you’re messaging has written a funny profile, try to mimic that style of humour in your line.

Suggested lines: “What’s a smart, attractive man/woman like myself doing without your number?”; “I can feel you staring at my profile from here”; “I totally hear you that grammar matters; it’s sad how few people use semicolons in their Tinder messages.”

#3 Show some confidence

Confidence is a very attractive trait and could be the key to success when it comes to communicating through online dating apps.

“A bold opening line doesn’t just convey confidence, it also shows that you’re out there to have fun, regardless of the outcome,” says John Roche, a therapist and coach at Transformation Counselling in Waterloo, Ont.

It’s also the best way to stand out, says Laura Bilotta, a Toronto matchmaker and author of Single in the City.

“Now is not the time to play coy,” she says. “Even if you play it over-confident, most people will understand that you’re trying to stand out rather than being vain.”

Suggested lines: “This app says we’re 93 per cent compatible. I’d like to test that out in real life”; “I love that picture of you on the beach; I wish I were there”; “I woke up thinking today was just another boring Monday, and then I saw your photo on my app.”

#4 Invite engagement

Your ultimate goal here is to inspire a back-and-forth conversation that will lead to a face-to-face encounter, so invite engagement by posing questions.

READ MORE: Dating with an STI: 7 ways to navigate the (often harsh) dating world

“Make a reference to something specific,” Ray says. “Maybe they mentioned a particular type of food they like in their profile or they’ve posted a picture in front of the Eiffel Tower. Ask them a question that’s specific to that.”

By offering this type of engagement, not only have you demonstrated that you’ve really read their profile, but you’re also more likely to get a response and spark a conversation.

Suggested lines: “I love Paris. Did you go to the top of the Eiffel Tower?”; “You’re a real foodie. If we were to go out for dinner, where would we go?”; “What’s your favourite pizza topping?”

#5 Be authentic

Authenticity can seem like a pipe dream when you’re meeting people through a digital app, but being genuine and even showing a little vulnerability can be very charming.

“People appreciate authenticity in a first message. By revealing something you might not normally be forthcoming with, it shows that you want to build trust,” Ray says.

READ MORE: Is it ever OK to date your friend’s ex?

This isn’t the time to unload your deepest secrets or childhood traumas, but it’s OK to share your trepidation of using a dating app or that you normally wouldn’t have the courage to approach this person in real life. Honesty is an attractive trait.

Suggested lines: “I’m new to this dating scene and to be honest, it kind of scares me”; “I don’t normally contact people on this, but I find you very intriguing”; “How does a person like me get a date with someone like you?”

Whether you're looking for a late-in-the-game companion to close out cuffing season or the bonafide love of your life, January is a crucial month for romance since it's peak dating-app time. No, seriously, it's been found to be the most active month for new or returning daters to swipe, which makes sense given the combined timeliness of those "get back out there" New Year's resolutions and the common reality of not wanting to leave your couch in the middle of winter. So in the interest of putting your best foot (or DM) forward, dating experts have thoughts on crafting good opening lines to use on dating apps in order to stand out in the best way.

According to relationship and online-dating expert Jess Carbino, PhD, who has served as both Tinder and Bumble's sociologist, the best angle to take is the personal one. Her research suggests that the most effective way to get your match to interact with you is by "creating a point of connection."

"One of the reasons we swipe right on someone is that we believe, based upon our evaluations of their profile, that we could share something in common," Dr. Carbino says. "For individuals looking to establish that connection, I advise them to personalize their message by making an observation regarding the bio or photo in the person's profile, stating how they can relate, and subsequently asking a question to move the conversation forward."

"I advise personalizing the message by making an observation regarding the bio or photo, stating how they can relate, and subsequently asking a question to move the conversation forward." —Jess Carbino, PhD

Erika Ettin, dating coach and founder of online-dating-coaching company A Little Nudge, agrees and adds that injecting humor is always a plus. "So, if they say they like pizza, for example, you could start with, 'I'm thinking cheese should be its own food group, yay or nay?'" she says. "Or 'I'm originally from New York, so pizza is in my blood. Have a favorite place?'"

And since travel is essentially a natural aphrodisiac in the dating-app world, why don't you play that up? Julie Spira, online-dating expert and matchmaker, suggests asking about your match's last big adventure. "An example would be, 'Hi [insert name]! I loved seeing your safari photos! Were they taken in Tanzania or Kenya?' Spira says. "If their photos include a beach or hiking shot, ask them what their favorite trail is, or if the photo was taken in Hawaii or the Caribbean."

But, what about the cases of blank profiles that leave you with no material to work from in order to craft good opening lines? That definitely makes things a little harder, but there's certainly still hope. "You could say something off the wall and random, or simply say, 'Your profile is blank...would love to hear something about you,'" Ettin says.There's also the possibility that this person is a dating-app novice who just needs to crack out of their shell.  Whatever the case, though, it's still possible to help foster a connection with nothing more than a good opening line if you keep things witty, intimate, and focused on the person in question.

And for specifics, relationship expert Susan Winter has a few icebreakers rounded up below you can try out if you're drawing a blank.

3 good opening lines to try on dating apps, according to a pro

1. "When was the last time you had a really great laugh? You know, the kind where your eyes are watering and you’re doubled over? And what was it that made you laugh so hard?"

What does Jessica Rabbit see in Roger Rabbit? "He makes me laugh." People (and criminally hot cartoon characters) often just want to be with someone who has a solid sense of humor. The thing is, we don't all find the same things to be hilarious.

"So, it would be an interesting first question to ask about a person's type of humor; what things do they find funny," says Winter. "Is it physical comedy, the observation of human foibles, posturing, or discomfort [like] The Office or Fleabag, or an event involving friends goofing around? This line of questioning provides a glimpse into the mental and emotional disposition of your perspective date."

2. "What moment or moments of your life have had a memorable impact?"

Very quickly, you'll get into the psyche of this person and get them to talk about their favorite feel-good subject: themselves.

"We all have mental images in our heads that stick, moments of our life that are recorded in freeze-frame," Winter says. "We’ve kept an image for one reason or another. Sometimes it’s profoundly meaningful and poignant. Other times, it’s just an everyday moment that took hold. What is that image? What does it signify?"

3. "Have you ever dated a contortionist before?"

Maybe this one works best for the double-jointed swiper, but why not throw a curveball and see what happens? "I realize starting this way ramps up the sexual banter, but it also throws your date off course and makes them think a bit," Winter says.

Not sure which app to download first? Here's our comprehensive guide to dating apps available right now. And this is whymaking the first moveactually works.

“How you doin'” may have worked like a charm for Joey Tribbiani, but opening lines best opening lines online dating, especially on a dating app, require a little more thought and originality to get you noticed.

“Opening lines, like first impressions, are really important — especially on dating apps or online-only contact — because people are so busy and so inundated with other responses,” says April Masini, best opening lines online dating, a New York-based relationship and etiquette expert and author. “An opening line can make it or break it when you’re looking to date.”

WATCH BELOW: To catch a catfish: Why do people create fake online dating profiles?

To catch a catfish: Why do people create fake online dating profiles?

Masini says to avoid opening with a sarcastic remark, as it’s too easily misinterpreted and to skip the sexual innuendo.

“Even if the person is in a bathing suit, avoid any opening line that mentions their body parts. They know they’re hot, that’s why they posted the photo they did. They want to know that you think they’re hot and datable,” she says.

The other reason why you should stay away from pointing out their sexiness is that it’s a given: “You wouldn’t be messaging them if you didn’t think they were hot,” says Toronto-based celebrity matchmaker and online dating expert, Carmelia Ray.

There are a number of tactics you can take with your opening line that will get someone’s attention, but above all else, Ray says, use that line on someone you’re truly compatible with.

“Do not message people if you’re blindly swiping left and right,” she says. “Read their profile and determine if you’re genuinely a match. Otherwise, you’re just wasting your time.”

These are some top tips from the experts on how to craft an opening line that will get a response on your dating apps.

#1 Give a little

“You’d be surprised how many people don’t give genuine compliments because they’re afraid of rejection,” Masini says. Go for something specific and genuine that shows you’ve really read their profile or noticed something about them that wouldn’t be obvious to everyone.

READ MORE: 5 signs you’re falling out of love

Terran Shea, best opening lines online dating Toronto-based matchmaker and date coach, says the keywords with a compliment are “tasteful” and “specific.” She advises personalizing the compliment as much as possible, and if you’re going to reference a celebrity or something from pop culture, be vague. It’ll force the person to Google the reference and then you’ll be on their mind.

Trending Stories

Suggested lines: “You look like someone I could take home to my mom and whisk away for a romantic weekend”; “My friends would be jealous if you went out with me”; “Has anyone ever told you that you look like [fill in name of obscure actor/actress].”

#2 Be funny

Admittedly, this isn’t the right approach for everyone, but if you can strike the right chord, humour is almost always a winning trait.

Masini says not to go too dark or shoot for “slip on a banana peel” humour: “Aim for charm and chuckle.” While Shea says if the person you’re messaging has written a funny profile, try to mimic that style of best opening lines online dating in your line.

Suggested lines: “What’s a smart, attractive man/woman like myself doing without your number?”; “I can feel you staring at my profile from here”; “I totally hear you that grammar matters; it’s sad how few people use semicolons in their Tinder messages.”

#3 Show some confidence

Confidence is a very attractive trait and could be the key to success when it comes to communicating through online dating apps.

“A bold opening line doesn’t just convey confidence, it also shows that best opening lines online dating out there to have fun, regardless of the outcome,” says John Roche, a therapist and coach at Transformation Counselling in Waterloo, Ont.

It’s also the best way to stand out, says Laura Bilotta, a Toronto matchmaker and author of Single in the City.

“Now is not the time to play coy,” best opening lines online dating says. “Even if you play it over-confident, most people will understand that you’re trying to stand out rather than being vain.”

Suggested lines: “This app says we’re 93 per cent compatible. I’d like to test that out in real life”; “I love that picture of you on the beach; I wish I were there”; “I woke up thinking today was just another boring Monday, and then I saw your photo on my app.”

#4 Invite engagement

Your ultimate goal here is to inspire a back-and-forth conversation that will lead to a face-to-face encounter, so invite engagement by posing questions.

READ MORE: Dating with an STI: 7 ways to navigate the (often harsh) dating world

“Make a reference to something specific,” Ray says. “Maybe they mentioned a particular type of food they like in their profile or they’ve posted a picture in front of the Eiffel Tower. Ask them a question that’s specific to that.”

By offering this type of engagement, not only have you demonstrated that you’ve really read their profile, but you’re also more likely to get a response and spark a conversation.

Suggested lines: “I love Paris. Did you go to the top of the Eiffel Tower?”; “You’re a real foodie. If we were to go out for dinner, where would we go?”; “What’s your favourite pizza topping?”

#5 Be authentic

Authenticity can seem like a pipe dream when you’re meeting people through a digital app, but being genuine and even showing a little vulnerability can be very charming.

“People appreciate authenticity in a first message. By revealing something you might not normally be forthcoming with, it shows that you want to build trust,” Ray says.

READ MORE: Is it ever OK to date your friend’s ex?

This isn’t the time to unload your deepest secrets or childhood traumas, but it’s OK to share your best opening lines online dating of using a dating app or that you normally wouldn’t have the courage to approach this person in real life. Honesty is an attractive trait.

Suggested lines: “I’m new to this dating scene and to be honest, it kind of scares me”; “I don’t normally contact people on this, but I find you very intriguing”; “How does a person like me get a date with someone like you?”

© 2022 LoveToKnow Media. All rights reserved.

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