Conservative dating apps like Righter, Patrio, and Donald Daters are on the rise - Vox

Conservative woman dating asian man

conservative woman dating asian man

In a recent blog post, we took another angle, considering how the sexual behavior of college students differs by immigrant status. Our results . distinguish the relationship patterns of Asian American men and women. In a recent exception, Brown et al. () compared non-Hispanic whites, non-. Hispanic. Asian students are the most conservative in their belief that sex requires love. As the graph shows, among women, white and black women are.

Conservative woman dating asian man - rather

My first crush was in kindergarten. It was unrequited love. We weren’t friends per se, but would often play tag at recess together. I would always try and tag him because I thought that was the way to let him know I liked him. But someone must have told him of my feelings, because one day, the minute I got near him on the playground, my classmate turned around and screamed, “I don’t like you, Chinawoman!” It was my first rejection.

Dating, romance, love, and sex — for me, these concepts have always been irrevocably intertwined with my social identities as an East Asian woman. From the tropes of the hypersexualized “dragon lady” to the “mail-order bride,” the image of Asian women in the West has typically been represented in the sexual, and strictly divided down the lines of a cunning prostitute-assassin, or a docile foreign wife.

These stereotypes and the culture of Orientalization have existed for some time, but it has always seemed like white America never felt their gravity until the events of this past year — the rise in anti-Asian hate crimes and specifically the aftermath of the Atlanta spa shootings. In the discourse, the killer’s defense of having a “sex addiction” was repeated over and over. How could this be? How could it have come to this point?

Maybe my classmate didn’t mean to cast a racial slur at me. After all, we were five. But this is far from one isolated story. The umbrella blanket term of AAPI — Asian American Pacific Islander — conceals the fact that Asian American women of different ethnicities are impacted by fetishization, hypersexualization, and othering in very unique ways. To reflect on the racial impacts of the COVID pandemic and white America’s rude awakening to the harms of (one facet of) AAPI stereotyping, Teen Vogue spoke to three young East Asian women about their experiences with love and sex, and where they intersect with race and gender.

Editor’s note: These conversations have been condensed and lightly edited for clarity.


Teen Vogue: Hi, everyone! Would you like to introduce yourselves?

Linda Tang: My name is Linda. I’m 17, and a first-generation Asian American. I live in a small, conservative, majority-white town in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

Melissa Lee: I’m Melissa. I am a year-old, first-generation Chinese American from Massachusetts. I have been living in Los Angeles since graduating from college in Boston.

Miri Hoshino: I’m Miri. I’m 22 and a second-generation Japanese American, currently based in New York.

Who was your first crush?

Miri: My first real crush was in the first grade, on this kid named Evan. He had moved from out of state and looked like Harry Potter.

Melissa: It was also first grade. His name was Michael. He was Caucasian, a triplet, and we shared many of the same friends up until college.

Linda: My first crush was on an Asian boy in sixth grade. He was…the only Asian boy in my grade.

Источник: [alovex.co]

How a liberal learned to respect conservative thinking
(and accept the fact that, yes, the right is happier than the left)

“Management went apoplectic,” the woman said. “Sure, they said my hair wasn’t relevant to my job performance; they agreed I did my job well. But I had to dye it back.”

The group nodded and rolled their eyes in sympathetic outrage. The owner of the hair didn’t even interact with the public! The business didn’t have a published dress code! To redye hair, it has to be bleached, and that’s a health risk!

I kept quiet. Like others who grew up in an age of personal freedom, I, too, reasoned, “Back off. I’m not hurting anyone else by doing x.”

Inside, however, I was coming down on the side of management, and here’s why: dyeing your hair purple as a something shows a lack of respect to your managers and fellow employees. It makes you stand out. You are defiantly not fitting in with the group. You are imposing on others by shrieking, “Look at me!”

I was also aware that my thoughts about the purple hair incident were very different from what they would have been a few years ago. They were changed by several things, but the most powerful forces were my readings in social and cross-cultural psychology and my experiences in other cultures.

Overseas Education

It was May Weeks earlier I had returned from a semester-long sabbatical in China, where I had traveled with my Taiwanese doctoral student for two research projects, both about language, but quite different. One project studied the cognitive processing underlying reading Chinese script, and the other involved interviews and questionnaires on the comfort and frequency of use of the phrase Wo ai ni (I love you). My husband and I had lived in rented apartments, and I’d traveled by bus or bike to meet every day with student assistants. I’d hung out in parks with my laptop, writing my academic papers, observing people playing and exercising, trying to communicate with interested locals who wanted to have their first conversation with an American.

Once, during a visit to a local Starbucks, I was startled to see a woman, a foreigner, who appeared to have some sort of facial dysmorphology. The bony protuberances of her cheekbones made me try to remember the name of the disease that could cause it. Then something clicked. She was a normal woman with a strong nose and cheekbones, characteristically Germanic features.

It turned out that three months of living as the rare Caucasian in Chinese neighborhoods had reconfigured my face recognition system (think of fumbling for words in your native tongue when you’ve been daily using another language). Back in Massachusetts, my face recognition system had almost instantly popped back to its normal setting. But the China trip had sensitized me to the virtue of minimizing individualist displays and respecting the desires of those above one in the social hierarchy. In the collectivist cultures of East Asia, people have been less concerned with expressing their individuality and more concerned about harmonious relations with others, including being sensitive to negative appraisal by others. One result is a well-behaved classroom of 30 preschoolers led by one teacher and an assistant.

As I sat at dinner with my female friends, I thought about the subtle power of social norms and respect for authority. In addition to the lessons of living in China, I remembered social psychologist (and author of the book Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion) Jonathan Haidt’s five foundations of morality. I’d admired Haidt’s work since I started assigning his New Yorker video to my cross-cultural psychology and cognitive psychology classes. Haidt had once given a colloquium to my department and visited my lab. In recent years the New York University professor has become something of a rock star of social psychology, largely because of his persuasive analysis of the value systems of liberals and of conservatives. Haidt proposes that the moral worldview of liberals focuses on justice and fairness, with equal treatment for all, and on care vs. harm, which involves having compassion for others. Political conservatives also have these values, says Haidt, but they are influenced by three other moral systems: respect for hierarchy, favoring one’s in-group over the out-group, and valuing purity (a complex concept that involves sexual propriety, nobility, and avoiding disgusting objects).

The idea that different groups embrace different value systems was, of course, not new, but prior to reading Haidt I had considered respect for authority, in-group favoritism, and purity to be components of collectivist cultural groups, which are usually associated with developing nations and are often described in opposition to the individualist values that are hallmarks of modern, developed regions (especially North America, Europe, and Australia). Collectivism is widespread throughout the rest of the world, particularly in what researchers call small scale societies, but it is also present in large and well organized societies such as China, where traditional values and wisdoms from premodern times, such as Confucian teachings, remain influential.

Neither System Is Better

When I teach these concepts in a cross-cultural psychology class, I typically ask students to discuss “crosscultural teasers” like these:

A researcher in Turkey is helping you translate your sociological questionnaire into Turkish, but she claims that a question on homelessness won’t be understood because homelessness does not exist in Turkey.

Many Americans think it is good for all teenagers to have an after-school job, but Indians feel this should be done only if the family needs the money.

An American entrepreneur explains to his elderly Polish relatives that his son has succeeded in business without having his father pull any strings or offer any financial assistance. The Polish relatives are horrified.

A graduate student from Kazakhstan has to forgo completing her PhD to return home to earn money so that her nephews can finish high school.

Americans are urged to say “I love you” regularly to family members; many Chinese young adults say their parents have never once said “Wo ai ni” to them.

I spent years holding conservative values in contempt. Not care about global warming?Harmful, wrong, and unfair!

The Turks, Indians, elderly Polish, Kazakhs, and Chinese presumably grew up in cultures where a premium was placed on sharing resources with in-group members, and where family members are expected to subordinate their own goals to those of the group. In contrast, individualistic societies are tolerant of nonconformity and celebrate the pursuit of one’s individual goals and self-expression. The kind of urban living that most of us experience, for example, offers options that reduce the need to rely on other people. If there is a hour convenience store down the street (or if you have a car and can stock up on supplies), then you don’t need to knock on your neighbor’s door to borrow a cup of sugar. City dwellers usually have bank and insurance accounts, which means we don’t have to store up favors with friends to be assured of having their back when an emergency hits. In fact, many Americans recall being warned not to loan money to friends, because that puts friendships in danger. In contrast, my Turkish collaborator, Ayse Aycicegi-Dinn, explains that Turkish friends loan money to deepen mutual obligations while avoiding paying interest to banks.

Cross-cultural psychologists do not view either individualism or collectivism as inherently superior or inferior. They understand that each system has evolved to solve the problem of how individuals can benefit from living in groups, and they see both systems as having pros and cons. Individualist societies like ours allow people to pursue their dreams (pro), but when big aspirations crumble because of bad luck or intense competition, they may lack a safety net, either in terms of government services or family support (con). In individualistic societies, transactions are abstract and conveniently monetized (pro). But when we don’t trade our labor and time with our neighbors for mutual benefit, we miss an opportunity for friendships to be built around helping each other (con). And indeed, friendships in individualist societies are typically many, diverse, and often shallow. They are easily initiated and routinely abandoned, as when, for example, we choose to relocate for a better paying job.

In collectivist societies, the familial ties and deep friendships that arise from never leaving your hometown and investing daily in relationship management provide a buffer against loneliness and depression. The downside is that collectivist cultures can have an oppressive small-town mentality that punishes nonconformists who challenge religious, gender, or sex role norms.

As a liberal, I spent many years holding conservative values in contempt. Not care about global warming? Exploit and vilify immigrants? Hold men and women to different standards of sexual behavior? Dismiss those living in poverty? Enact legislation to help those who were already successful keep their wealth? Harmful, wrong, and unfair!

So what hit me so hard when reading the work of Jonathan Haidt was the realization that the three moral systems that liberals disavow, but conservatives embrace (that is, respect for authority, prioritizing in-group members, purity) are the hallmarks of the collectivist value systems I learned about as part of doing cross-cultural research and living overseas. My current and more sympathetic understanding is that the central goal of collectivist societies (and social conservatism as a political ideology) is reserving resources for the in-group, a strategy that was necessary in earlier eras when the neighboring tribe was encroaching on your territory and daily survival was often uncertain. Purity rules and emphasis on obedience to authority are tools that help small-scale societies increase group cohesion and survival.

Collaborating with Scholars On “the Other Side”

My research, my teaching, and my traveling showed me that for the majority of cultures that have thrived on our planet, socially conservative political views made a lot of sense. But what really made me more tolerant about “the other side” was when I started rubbing shoulders in a collaboration with scholars who self-identified as centrist, middle-of-the-road, politically moderate, religious, and even conservative. Theologian Wesley Wildman, a School of Theology professor, religious studies scholar, and wide-ranging thinker, asked me to become a research associate at the Institute for the Bio-Cultural Study of Religion. Sitting in meetings with fellow members of the institute’s Spectrums Project, whose goal is to find strategies for mitigating the problems associated with religious extremism and polarized religious discourse, allowed me to ask hard questions of people I respected. For example, why are ideological conservatives pro–big business, slashing food stamps in order to “shrink government” while subsidizing agribusiness?

Many scholars and thinkers have grappled with just how the Republican party married probusiness, antiworker, neoliberalism ideas with small-town social conservatism. One could even say that conservatives in Congress have to prioritize supporting their in-group, and their in-group is probusiness. Freemarket capitalism does seem to be a different beast from social conservatism. One of my conservative colleagues pointed me to enlightening essays about this in the American Conservative, a magazine I found to be far more reasonable than one would think from the constant vilification of conservatives on a website I enjoy, alovex.co

All of the above, the travel, the research, teaching, and the collaboration, has led me to a place where, instead of inching away when I meet someone who expresses conservative political values, I take the opportunity to learn. And not just because some conservatives join forces with liberals by being against patriarchy, racism, and my-country-first patriotism. There’s something else about conservatives that is interesting: they’re happier than liberals.

I have long appreciated the optimism about human progress that is a key ideal of liberalism (think of the term “progressive”). While I still embrace this view, I wonder if conservative ideals are more natural ideals. That is, does human nature, as it emerged under the pressures of natural selection of our small-group-living ancestors, include the urge to curtail individual expression, enforce authority, and hoard resources for the in-group? Compared to liberals, social conservatives may well be living lives that are more similar to what humans have lived for tens of thousands of years. And if so, is their more natural mind-set the reason that conservatives are, at least according to surveys, often happier than liberals?

Circle the answers you think best complete this sentence: If you are the houseguest of a friend-of-a-friend, your stay might be physically and socially more comfortable if your hosts are a) liberal b) conservative, but the conversation will be more intellectually stimulating if your hosts are a) liberal b) conservative.

If you answered b and a, then your intuitions are consistent with a growing literature on how personality and cognitive function match up with ideological beliefs. Conservatives are (on average) sociable, agreeable, and conscientious, as well as concerned about pleasing and fitting in with others of their group. When compared to conservatives, liberals are (on average), less socially astute and less attuned to the needs of others, less agreeable, and overall, less happy. On the intellectual side, liberals, compared to conservatives, prefer abstract, intellectual topics, as is consistent with their broader moral scope. Liberals are concerned with starvation in Africa, climate change, the threatened biosphere, factory farming, and issues that, important as they are, are far removed from the ordinary American’s day-to-day existence.

Social scientists have a long way to go to figure out the tangled causal relations holding among the observed correlations, but here’s a question: does big-picture, abstract thinking cause liberals to be less happy because they are removing themselves from the embodied here and now? After all, the ability to live in the moment and appreciate our lives as they exist does seem to be a key ingredient in day-to-day contentment. Or is it conservatives’ concern with lasting marriage, strong family cohesiveness, and day-to-day sociality that tips the scales toward greater daily contentment and happiness?

These ideas—from cross-cultural psychology to cognitive/personality styles—have been at the heart of my personal and intellectual journey during the last decade (when, perhaps not incidentally, I got married and gave birth to twin boys). It makes more sense to me now to incorporate into one’s tool kit all the strategies for a fulfilling life. When we understand more of the full set of ways to be human, we can be more human.

Catherine Caldwell-Harris is a College of Arts &#; Sciences associate professor of psychology and a research associate at the nonprofit Institute for the Bio-Cultural Study of Religion.

Источник: [alovex.co]

The white women who flipped: the price of changing your conservative views

“I love you,” Chera Sherman’s mother told her before driving away in her Jeep Cherokee, leaving her daughter, then 19, bawling fat tears in front of her boyfriend’s home in Laurel, Mississippi.

It was , and Sherman had made the life-altering mistake of falling in love with Jerry Breland, a lanky, black year-old she’d met through a friend back when she worked at Kmart.

Her mother had finally told her stepfather about their six-month relationship earlier that day after a local cop pulled Breland over while he was driving his girlfriend’s yellow Sunbird. When her stepfather heard she was violating his code against race-mixing, he drove to her job to tell her she had to move out.

“White men aren’t going to want you,” her father told her.

They allowed her to collect only what she could carry. The teenager couldn’t take her bedding or her jewelry – she even had to leave her car. “I love ya, but I just can’t have this,” her stepfather said as she grabbed random items.

In the car, the teen was hysterical the whole way; she was crazy about her boyfriend, but she didn’t want to be an orphan. She loved her family, too. “You made this decision,” her mother said, adding that she didn’t agree with her husband but had no control over it: he was the man of the house. And with that, she drove off.

Racism was the required way of life in Sherman’s mostly segregated community. When she was four, she had called a black man the N-word in public because that’s what she believed black people were called. The man was mortified, and her family members had laughed.

Inside, her boyfriend’s father told her she could sleep on the couch until the couple could get an apartment. They found one, but the owner kicked them out after a month when he realized Breland was black. They then landed a rental house where the landlord only cared about the color green.

Although she’d made good grades and planned to enroll at a community college that fall, higher education never happened for Sherman due to the obligations the couple took on to be together. He now works offshore on an oil rig; she takes care of their two boys.

‘Gaslighting is an art form perfected by conservatives’

Still happily married after 25 years, Sherman-Breland now believes many women pay the price – through abuse, rejection or public humiliation – for rejecting America’s rat’s nest of conservatism and racism that has exploded into full relief in Trump’s America.

“I can’t tell you the countless number of times younger Caucasian girls who are going through the same exact thing have reached out to me for advice,” she says now.

The south isn’t alone in its paternalism and sexism, but it is still a high art form here. “It is absolutely taught,” Sherman-Breland says. “You understand as a young girl that your place is behind your man, not in front or beside him. You cannot have your own opinions. That’s the most prevalent way they keep you in check.”

Sherman-Breland gradually went against her family’s broader conservative political beliefs as she became concerned about the future of her biracial sons, but it took hearing people she knew calling President Obama “the devil”, and Donald Trump’s open bigotry and birtherism, to electrify her. She now calls herself a proud liberal.

Most conservative wedge issues trace back to racism and sexism, she argues, adding that those poison beliefs take many shapes: abortion and immigration might make white people the minority; affirmative action gives the supposedly inferior an equal shot at jobs and education; public assistance benefits “freeloaders” of color.

White women continue to embrace such prevalent mores. “We’re helping you be a better woman. You’ll be stronger as a submissive Christian,” she says, mocking local white conservatives.

Sherman-Breland used to be anti-abortion herself, and while she doubts conservative men would actually overturn Roe v Wade – abortion is useful to them if they get the wrong women pregnant – she says they instead use it to get religious women to vote against their best interests. Abortion, she says, is what keeps many women she knows from quietly pulling a more progressive voting lever, especially after hearing Trump or Roy Moore next door in Alabama seem to justify sexual assault.

“Gaslighting is an art form perfected by conservatives in the south,” she says, wrinkling her nose.

The hypocrisy kills her. College wasn’t an option for her parents, either, who worked at garment factories. “We relied on social programs to eat,” she says, her smirk dripping with irony. “Not that they were lazy.”

No free pass for white women

White supremacy and all its destructive deep-seated beliefs are, like other forms of barbarism, usually ascribed to men. But historian Elizabeth Gillespie McRae warns that it is a mistake to give white women a pass while ignoring their role in America’s systemic racism.

“What’s wrong with white women?” – a common question after the election – is due to an amnesia, according to McRae, a history professor at Western Carolina University. McRae’s book, Mothers of Massive Resistance: White Women and the Politics of White Supremacy, illuminates powerful grassroots alliances of women across the country that worked to keep segregation alive in the 20th century.

“Segregation’s constant gardeners,” as McRae calls those women, distributed myth-filled textbooks and created student essay contests justifying white supremacy in public schools. They also enforced “racial integrity laws” used to kick someone who had “non-white” blood out of school, or have their marriage license refused.

Many of them were educated – some suffragists and newspaperwomen or even union advocates – and they purposefully helped create the twisted race politics that Sherman-Breland describes.

As the civil rights movement gained power, southern segregationists knew they were going to lose, McRae says, and they joined forces with conservatives nationally who coded their own racism. “Outside of the south, they needed to minimize overt racial language and instead talk about ‘constitutional government’,” McRae says. “Campaigning against social welfare and the safety net served their segregation purposes, too.”

Segregationist women used black-inferiority myths to bolster explosive anti-busing protests in Boston in the s, McRae adds. “It’s not to say that all conservatives are white supremacists, but that white supremacists and segregationist politics animated and shaped the new right,” McRae says. “Folks advocating various forms of segregation were all over the nation.”

And they still are. White women, she says, are still often the loudest voices in these battles to keep children of color and/or poverty from “tainting” schools.

‘I wasn’t taught real history’

Lynne Schneider, 49, grew up in Lawrence county, Mississippi. Schneider’s early views were shaped in the Southern Baptist church, but saying the N-word was frowned upon by then, and her working-class parents didn’t allow it.

But in her public school, which was about two-thirds white, black kids sat on their own side of the cafeteria, and white children like Schneider went to a “private” pool that didn’t allow African Americans.

Young Schneider believed her elders when they said everything was equal between races, or that the south fought the civil war for honorable reasons and not over slavery. “I wasn’t exactly an examining person. I wasn’t taught real history,” she says, adding that her textbooks were filled with romantic myths about the Old South.

That wasn’t by accident, historian McRae says. Starting in the early 20th century, a well-funded group of women descended from Confederate soldiers, were desperate to rewrite the reasons why their fathers and grandfathers fought in the civil war. Daughters of the Confederacy leadersworked diligently to ensure that textbooks pushed “happy slave” lies and pride in European colonialism. They even worked with new teachers’ unions to pass on revisionist books to black public schools.

As an adult, Schneider emulated women around her, voting Republican when she was She married a conservative man and became a teacher. By the time she came to Murrah high school in Jackson, Mississippi, in , the formerly all-white school was majority-black. Today at 95% black, it is, astonishingly, the whitest public school in the capital city.

There she met an English teacher, a white woman, who challenged her to think deeper on issues such as abortion and gay rights. Later, her black students helped change her “small government” conservative beliefs which, she realized, keep schools underfunded and subject to constant attacks.

The students also pushed back when she messed up.

One day, Schneider told a class to “stop acting like BeBe kids,” a term used in the black community to reference misbehaving kids.

“You’re calling us ratchet ghetto kids,” they charged.

Schneider apologized for hurting them. “I still make mistakes,” she told them.

To “step out of the ignorance and blinders” of her upbringing, Schneider attended race dialogues and trainings such as Teaching for Change, but she warns other whites not to get high-and-mighty. “When a white person decides they’re so ‘woke’, they can be a little too quick to know more about black people than black people. No matter how clued in you are, you’re still white,” she warns.

She knows plenty of white women who are scared to reject their conservative upbringing, even if their beliefs have morphed, too. “They don’t want to fall out of favor, not be accepted,” she says. “Mississippi is like a football game. People want to be on the winning team. If you’re not conservative here, you have to get used to your side losing.”

‘I had $, a suitcase and a child’

Anna McNeill’s first husband punched her in the hip one day, leaving a bruise the size of a grapefruit. He told her later she must have run into a piece of furniture.

He soon made it clear she had to mirror his beliefs. That included voting the same. Both were religious conservatives – he had attended seminary – so the compliance did not immediately seem onerous. But she soon learned what complete control felt like.

“As long as he didn’t cheat on me, beat me or spend all of our money on gambling or whatever, he said I should count myself lucky,” McNeill, now 39, says. He told her he was the only one who would put up with her, and quoted the Bible to ensure that she was fully submissive to him and isolated from friends and family.

“The gaslighting was the main thing, right?” she says. “I doubted myself.”

She finally left him. “I had $, a suitcase and a child. I didn’t have resources.”

Therapy helped her question the family-values party line she and her husband followed. “I was conservative but starting to feel pretty disenfranchised by the Republican party,” she says.

McNeill soon remarried and had two more children with a second husband. He was ultra-conservative and his views on race disturbed her. “If I contested, I worried he would make my children suffer. Depression will suck all the fight out of you.”

She eventually left him, too. Now, she is happily alone with her children and involved in causes she believes in, trying to do domestic-violence advocacy work full time. “My interest in criminal justice reform came about because of my interest in domestic violence,” she says. “I started realizing a lot of these people that were incarcerated came from traumatic backgrounds.”

Still deeply religious, McNeill believes in “limited government” and says Trump proves how dangerous too much power can be in a bad leader’s hands. “I tend now to lean more toward libertarian, which is big enough for both liberals and conservatives,” she says, adding that the government should stay out of all marriage decisions, including same-sex.

McNeil is still anti-abortion. She says probably nine out of 10 white women she knows who voted for Trump in backed him only because of his stance on abortion, looking past his distasteful traits because the issue is “ a human rights issue” to them. “If you believe that is a person, then you have to protect that person,” she says.

Do anti-choice voters believe Trump really cares about abortion? “Oh, no,” McNeill says, laughing. “They thought he was more likely to appoint judges who would address that issue. Almost every single person says, ‘I will hold my nose. He’s in there four to eight years, but those judges are for life’.”

The fear of communism and socialism

In the late s, Jan Levy Mattiace’s half-Jewish father and Methodist mother pulled her out of public school and enrolled her in a new segregation academy. Although her father was more progressive than most, many white parents then rejected public schools due to the red scare, during which white leaders, segregation academies and the Ku Klux Klan drummed up fear of the supposedly putrid mix of civil rights and communism.

“As children, we did not realize what was going on,” Mattiace says now, adding that she’s happy to see racial diversity in her alma mater today. The most recent US Department of Education numbers show Mississippi’s Canton Academy was 85% white, 12% black, 2% Hispanic and 1% Asian as of the school year. The town of Canton is 71% black.

In the s, Mattiace became the political director of the Mississippi Republican party before, she says, the extreme-right took over the GOP. She recruited more black members even as national strategists like Lee Atwaterhelped perfect the bigoted “southern strategy” to draw racist voters from a shifting Democratic party to the GOP.

Today, at age 55, Mattiace is on the board of Dialogue Jackson, which hosts race conversations across political divides. She voted for the black Democrat Mike Espy against Cindy Hyde-Smith for Senate last November and now calls herself a “centrist” who may vote for a Democrat for governor this year.

“I land between Colin Powell and George Herbert Walker Bush,” she says. But, she adds, “I am not a feminist.” She is for equal rights, respect and opportunity for women, however, and is now married to a commercial developer who decidedly does not tell her how to vote.

Polarization between the left and right have long worried her, but Donald Trump concerns her more. Many of her friends may vote for him a second time in But for them it’s not about abortion, or following their husbands’ orders. “It was a vote against Hillary. Or against the Democratic agenda. They feel like that’s a danger,” Mattiace says. They find Trump better than the communist horrors many learned about at home and school.

“There’s a fear of moving into a socialist society,” Mattiace says. “They’re people that may have relatives in socialist countries … that are grasping for groceries and have to take a number to buy food. Trying to redistribute wealth fairly like that, it becomes chaotic, a war zone.”

Can people truly change?

People can change, as Sherman-Breland and her husband have learned. They stayed in the same county, marrying a decade after her mother dumped her in front of Breland’s house that day.

Over time, Sherman’s family fell in love with their grandchildren and with Breland – even her stepfather. “When he died in , he was probably closer to Jerry than anyone else in his life,” she says of her stepdad.

Her husband never got nor expected an apology, however.

Sherman-Breland is concerned about Trump dragging old-school racism out of the hall closet. He is making people backslide into open hatefulness, dividing families like hers around the country, she says.

She worries especially about what Trumpism is doing to her own family’s loving detente. “When my family started supporting Trump and the ideals of all his rhetoric, it was literally like reliving all of that hurt again,” she says.

“I know they love us. But their support of this rise in white supremacy is devastating all over again. It has ripped my family apart. Again.”

Источник: [alovex.co]

Dating attitudes and expectations among young Chinese adults: an examination of gender differences

The Journal of Chinese Sociologyvolume 3, Article number: 12 () Cite this article

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Abstract

While researchers have long examined the dating and mate selection patterns among young adults, the vast majority have utilized Western samples. In order to further our understanding of the changing nature of dating behaviors and attitudes, this study examines a sample of young Chinese adults and focuses upon the gender differences therein. Using a foundation of social exchange theory, the analyses illustrate the differences between the dating attitudes and expectations of Chinese women and men. Per traditional expectations, both sexes place a low priority on sexual behaviors, yet more progressive attitudes and behaviors are also evident. Women, in particular, appear to be more focused on pragmatic qualities in prospective partners. The influence of individualist values and the changing cultural norms pertaining to dating and familial roles are discussed.

Dating and romantic relationships are a normal, yet essential, part of life during the adolescent and early adult years. Beyond the basic desires which most individuals experience during this time, researchers have noted the relative significance of dating, not only for individuals but also for societies. The initiation and maintenance of intimate, romantic relationships have been linked with improved physical and emotional well-being, stronger perceptions of community attachment, and better developmental outcomes for the individuals (e.g., Amato ; Braithwaite et al. ; Proulx et al. ). During adolescence and the early adult years, dating enhances identity formation for individuals and provides socialization experiences which are necessary to forming and maintaining intimate and interpersonal relationships in life (Chen et al. ). Although researchers have directed their efforts toward a better understanding of the dynamics of dating and partner selection, focusing upon the influence of such elements as the family environment (e.g., parental divorce, parental marital quality, parent-child relationships), peer relationships, and community factors (Bryant and Conger ; Cui and Fincham ; Yoshida and Busby ), the majority of studies focusing upon dating and romantic relationships have utilized samples of Western youth.

In China, marriage and family life continues to be a central element within Chinese culture, with adolescents and young adults typically assuming that they will eventually find a partner. What is lacking, however, is a broader understanding of how contemporary Chinese youth view dating and intimate relationships. Researchers have noted this shortcoming and have called for greater empirical examination of partner selection in contemporary urban China (Xu et al. ) and particularly the attitudinal and expectational dimensions of dating (Hu and Scott ) and how these might vary by gender (Shek ). The present study will seek to address these calls for empirical study by using a sample of Chinese college students to examine the nature of attitudes and expectations concerning dating among young adults in contemporary China. The analyses which follow will attempt to more accurately discern the nature of such attitudes and expectations, as well as differences which may exist between females and males.

Dating and relationships

From a generational perspective, dating and romantic relationships in China are regarded differently, as adolescents and young adults may have more progressive beliefs, as compared to their parents. Researchers have noted that Chinese parents tend to oppose adolescent dating (Chen et al. ), perhaps due to their more traditional perspectives. While there is no clear definition of what is an appropriate age for individuals to begin dating, those who begin dating at early ages will typically have to cope with the opposition of parents (Wu ). Nonetheless, there is widespread acceptance that dating is becoming increasingly popular among Chinese youth (Tang and Zuo ).

Among Chinese college students, in particular, dating has quickly elevated in popularity (Yang ). Even the behaviors within dating appear to be rapidly changing over time. Behaviors such as holding hands and kissing in public, which may been somewhat taboo only a few decades ago, in China, are now becoming increasingly commonplace (Xia and Zhou ; Yang ). For such populations, who are often away from the eyes of their parents, college life may present opportunities for not only dating but also sexual activity (Xia and Zhou ). Lei () reports that over one third of college students in China had become sexually active while enrolled in school. While dating and sexual activity among Chinese college students have been previously noted by researchers (e.g., Xu ), comparatively less is known about the attitudes and expectations of youth concerning these behaviors. In regard to premarital sex, for example, some studies have reported that 86 % of respondents approve of it (see Tang and Zuo ), while other studies have noted that vast majority of men want their brides to be virgins at the time of marriage (Ji ).

Seemingly, contemporary Chinese college students may be adopting a perspective of dating and intimate relationships which focuses less on paths toward marriage and more on immediate pleasure and gratification (Yang ). Much of this may also related to institutional changes, as the interpersonal relationships of students have been somewhat suppressed by colleges and universities (Aresu ). Universities commonly attempt to discourage sexual activity among students through educational programs and policies (Aresu ). Nonetheless, a comparison of college students in and revealed that self-reported premarital sexual intercourse rates went from to 32 %, respectively (Pan ). Not surprisingly, Chinese parents tend to strongly discourage their daughters and sons from becoming sexual active, and many are opposed to their children being involved in dating relationships, at all (Stevenson and Zusho ).

The social and cultural context of dating

Aspects of dating, such as appropriate behaviors within dating and the appropriate age at which to begin dating, are greatly influenced by the larger social context in which they occur (Chen et al. ). Similarly, researchers have noted that attitudes and expectations concerning dating and intimate relationships are also affected by the larger cultural context (Hynie et al. ; Sprecher et al. ; Yan ). But China’s cultural context goes back several thousands of years. It has a written language that has been in use for the longest continuous period of time in the world, and it has the oldest written history (Han ). Thus, in order to best understand and appreciate the social dynamics occurring in present day China, one should first examine some of the important long-standing traditions connected to its culture.

The traditional expectations concerning dating and marriage have a long history within Chinese culture and are based heavily upon ancestor worship and Confucian ideology. From this perspective, filial piety and the continuation of family lineage are of tremendous importance (Han ). Hence, marriage (as the end goal of intimate relationships) is absolutely necessary and particularly so for males (Liu et al. ). One of the enduring cultural traits is “xiao,” which, in the most basic sense, refers to filial piety. The Chinese character for “xiao” can visually be interpreted as a child with an old man on his back (Han ). The long-standing expectation of “xiao” is that children devote their lives, without question, to their parents and families. This involves, especially for sons, the care for parents in their elderly years (see Ho ). Understandably, this places great pressure upon unmarried sons to negotiate with his parents over the identification and selection of a suitable wife, who, in turn, will also provide assistance to his aging parents. For sons, in particular, “xiao” makes finding a spouse a priority and consequently makes dating take on a different quality.

China is typically regarded as a collectivistic culture, in which obligations to the greater society and social institutions (e.g., the family) are considered more important than individual traits and needs (Kwang ; Ting-Toomey et al. ). Within individualistic cultures, romantic love is regarded as essential to marital satisfaction and well-being (Dion and Dion ). Hence, individual choice within dating relationships and mate selection processes is more likely to occur within individualistic cultures. Collectivistic cultures prompt young adults to regard love and romantic relationships within the larger context of their familial and societal obligations (Yang ). This, then, may lead young adults within collectivistic cultures to emphasize the pragmatic functions of dating and eventual marriage, while having less concern with notions of “love” and “romance” (Hsu ).

Following the end of the reign of Mao Tse-tung, along with the collapse of the former USSR, a fairly rapid pace of social, political, and economic changes occurred in China (e.g., Croll ; Tang and Parish ; Wang ). The post-Mao Chinese government has steadily encouraged economic modernization and the development of economic practices based upon free market principles similar to those found in Westernized countries. Social policies, such as the notable “One-Child Policy,” have been relaxed over recent years (Denyer ), allowing for individuals to better seek mates who are compatible in terms of number of children they desire to procreate. Whereas Chinese culture once emphasized the role of family in the selection of partners, with a strong tendency toward arranged marriages (Yang ), young Chinese adults now have greater choice in such decisions (Xu ). When combined with other changes, such as higher rates of educational attainment for women (Li ; Wu and Zhang ) and increased sexual activity among young adults (Feng and Quanhe ), it is likely that both culture preferences and actual behaviors concerning dating and mate selection may be undergoing substantial changes in China, as well.

The economic changes have had a considerable effect upon traditional family structures and behaviors. The collectivist nature of Chinese culture has been altered by economic factors in several substantial ways (see Yang ). First, there has been a steady shift away from collectivism toward individualism, causing people to give priorities to their own needs, rather than those of their family or larger society. Second, traditional marital relationships, often formed as a matter of practicality, have diminished and been replaced by a preference for relationships based on romance and Western notions of love. Finally, Chinese women, by virtue of their increasing educational and occupational attainment, now have greater economic independence, thus lowering their need to secure a spouse as a way of ensuring financial security. Hence, the traditional combination of marriage, sex, and family, as upheld by long-standing Chinese cultural expectations, has become less influential, particularly in regard to serving as a foundation of dating and partner selection.

Younger cohorts, who have had greater exposure to increasing individualism and Western culture, may approach dating and mate selection in a different manner from the previous generation. However, these younger cohorts must also recognize the existence of long-standing norms, as filial obligation remains a very tangible value in Chinese culture (Chui and Hong ), and continues to bind children to their parents. Indeed, recent studies have suggested that dating (Kim ) and decisions within marriage, itself, are still strongly affected by Chinese parents (Pimentel ). Given the relative paucity of research on dating and intimate relationships within China, it is difficult to accurately discern how these changes may be affecting young adults’ dating behaviors. When combined with other changes, such as migration, urbanization, income growth, increased social inequality, consumer culture, mass media, the Internet, and personal communication devices, some qualitative research suggest that both attitudes and actual behaviors concerning dating and mate selection are undergoing change in at least one of China’s largest cities. Research in Taiwan suggests that young adults are shifting their perspectives on dating and romance, away from traditional expectations (see Chang and Chan ). Zhang and Kline (), using a sample from mainland China, found that many young adults found their partner on their own accord but still maintained a desire to satisfy their parents’ wishes. In contemporary China, it is quite likely that both traditional expectations and newer, more modern attitudes concerning dating and partner selection are present. Whether one set of expectations is more influential, or if there is a merger or evolution of new attitudes concerning dating and partner selection, remains to be seen.

Gender and dating

Among Chinese youth, attitudes and expectations concerning dating and intimate relationships will also likely vary between females and males. In terms of dating and partner preferences, researchers have noted a considerable difference between the sexes, with a substantial double standard still prevailing (Piotrowski et al. ). For men, the ideal quality in a woman is beauty, while for women, the ideal quality in a man is intelligence (Xia and Zhou ). Generally, Chinese women are expected to marry at an earlier age, while they are still at the peak of their physical appearance and capacity to bear children, whereas men are expected to marry at a later age, after they have achieved financial success (Piotrowski et al. ). Recent studies suggest that stereotyped perceptions of young men and women exist (Jankowiak and Li ). Men are more often regarded as serious, ambitious, stubborn, deceitful, independent, and powerful, while women are viewed as quiet, anxious, excitable, gentle, depressed, shy, and jealous (Jankowiak and Li ).

In order to more fully comprehend these gender differences within Chinese culture, a much longer historical context must be considered. Gender ideologies in China have long been founded upon the general belief that women are supposed to be submissive and secondary to men (Bloodworth ). With Confucian philosophy, women are expected to maintain the three rules of obedience: (1) obeying their fathers and brothers prior to marriage, (2) obeying their husbands within marriage, and (3) as a widow, obeying their adult sons (Chia et al. ; Yang ). This set of beliefs, while seemingly outdated in contemporary society, is nonetheless one which has a very long existence within the Chinese culture. Indeed, several studies have suggested that even in the face of modernization and the influence of Western culture, traditional gender attitudes may persist. Researchers have found that many Chinese adults maintain traditional beliefs concerning the division of household labor (Cook and Dong ) and the responsibilities of child care (Rosen ). Males are still generally assumed to occupy the provider role within the family (Chia et al. ).

The relative roles and status of Chinese females and males have been patriarchal in nature for many centuries, yet these long-standing differences may be changing. In terms of educational attainment, for example, women’s educational attainment rates, which had previously lagged far behind those of men, are now rising. Indeed, both in terms of enrollment and completion rates, women now exceed men in Chinese colleges and universities (Wu and Zhang ). Women’s employment, which has always been guaranteed within China, is on par with that of men. Higher levels of educational attainment, coupled with comparable employment and earnings levels, may lead Chinese women to maintain more egalitarian attitudes concerning gender and gender roles. How these gendered expectations affect contemporary dating attitudes and behaviors, though, is yet unknown.

While addressing gender-related issues which may affect the dating and mate selection patterns of young Chinese adults, it is equally necessary to address the sex ratio of the population, itself. One lasting effect of the one-child policy, when combined with the traditional preference for sons, is that the current adult population contains more males than females. Currently (based on census data), the sex ratio for the population of never-married individuals, 15 years of age and above, is (Liu et al. ). Despite the recent changes to the one-child policy, the skewed sex ratio is expected to create a male marriage “squeeze” for at least a few more decades, thus making it difficult for the current adult male population to find a wife (Guilmoto ). It is quite likely that the sex ratio will have an impact, not only upon mate selection but also the preceding dating behaviors. South and Trent () have noted that the sex ratio imbalance is associated with higher levels of premarital sex among Chinese women but is associated with lower levels of premarital sex among men.

Understanding gender differences in dating

Numerous perspectives have been offered as attempts to explain gender differences which have been identified within dating and intimate relationships. Buss and his colleagues (Buss et al. ; Buss ) have suggested that there is an evolutionary basis for such differences. Males, in this perspective, will seek females with greater physical attractiveness, youth, and chastity, while females will seek out males with greater resources (i.e., financial), intelligence, and ambition. Male preferences will be based upon their desire to obtain a suitable mating partner, for the purpose of bearing offspring, while female preferences will be based upon their desire for a provider/protector. Although this perspective has generated considerable debate, it does not readily address differences which may results from a specific cultural context.

Exchange theory may provide a foundation for better understanding the nature of dating and partner selection in China. Parrish and Farrer () posit that gender roles within China have undergone considerable change, due to both micro-level mechanisms of bargaining (e.g., within couple’s relationships) and macro-level shifts in existing social institutions (e.g., educational and occupational institutions). Given the dramatic increases in both Chinese women’s educational attainment and greater occupational attainment, they now have greater status in many situations, specifically in regard to bargaining and decision-making within personal relationships (Gittings ; Guthrie ). From a historical perspective, the New Marriage Law of helped to set into motion a shift toward improved statuses for women, by legalizing gender equality and freedom of choice in both marriage and divorce. These improvements have, in turn, set the stage for a considerable shift away from more traditional forms of dating and mate selection and have also made the potential “Westernization” of ideologies surrounding romance and dating relationships even more likely (Hatfield and Rapson ).

The imbalanced sex ratio may also create an environment in which women have even greater influence, particularly in regard to dating and mate selection. Assuming a strong preference for marriage, exchange theory would again support the notion that women, as the smaller population, would have a decisive advantage. The dyadic power thesis (see Sprecher ) posits that, in this instance, the relative scarcity of women increases their dyadic power within relationships (see also Ellingson et al. ). Hence, women would not only have greater control over the selection of a partner but also wield greater decision-making power within the relationship. This perspective is supported by recent studies which show that Chinese women have become increasingly selective in the marriage market, preferring men with higher salaries, more prestigious occupations, and better living quarters (Liu ). Within the context of dating and intimate relationships, men with less social capital (e.g., educational attainment, income, desirable housing) may find it increasingly challenging to find a date, much less a spouse (see Peng ). Understandably, the cultural expectation held by Chinese men that women should be docile and tender may greatly complicate men’s search for a partner, as Chinese women’s greater selection power, coupled with changes in the broader culture of dating, may directly counter long-standing gendered expectations (see Parrish and Farrer ).

Research questions and hypotheses

Given China’s record setting leap into becoming a industrialized country in just a matter of decades on top of having a very ancient cultural history which serves as a source of pride, one would half expect China’s traditional culture to “stand strong like bamboo” or, at worse, perhaps bend a bit. On the other hand, one would expect something to give under such complete and rapid societal change. Young Chinese students should be the members of society who would be most willing to abandon traditional Chinese values and the associated behavioral processes which control dating (and marriage) and move toward adopting Western style patterns where familial relationships are forged out of affective individualism. Under this approach, marriages are based largely on love type feelings and the decision about whom to marry resides mostly with the individual. In an increasingly stratified society, the actors might feel most comfortable seeking out life partners who occupy similar positions within the social structure (i.e., education level, social class, occupational prestige, ethnicity). This process is called homogamy.

Hypothesis 1

The dating behavior of students should not be strongly influenced by parents who continue to hold a traditional perspective. In other words, elements of affective individualism should manifest themselves.

An adolescent youth subculture is on the rise in China, and hence, the influence of peers on the dating and courtship behaviors of individuals will increase and eventually become stronger than that of the family. In the power vacuum caused by the decline of parental influence, young people will most likely fill the void as the culture becomes less backward looking and more forward looking.

Hypothesis 2

Peers and the adolescent subculture, as opposed to parents, should exert a significant influence on the dating behavior of Chinese youth.

Chinese culture is thousands of years old. Thus, one should not expect the traditional, conservative, patriarchal Chinese values will completely disappear among present day Chinese youth and hence have no impact on dating relationships. Cultural rebels—male and female—will be present, exploring the uncharted cultural waters. However, cultural conformists who are reluctant to abandon family and tradition will maintain some degree of cultural continuity across time and generations.

Hypothesis 3

Since culture and gender relations are generally resistant to rapid change in society, centuries old traditional gender role attitudes should be found to continue to persist among significant numbers of Chinese youth.

To the extent that traditional values about dating and relationships impact the decision-making process, they may also be imbedded in the types of personal qualities that singles are looking for in their potential mates. If traditional values continue to exert an influence on thinking and behavior despite changes in the social context, then males and females will gravitate toward different criteria. Also, comparative research on partner preferences finds that preferences fall into three broad or seemingly universal categories: physical, practical, and personal. The extent to which these three categories are gendered is not addressed in the literature. However, we expect to find them operating in our study population and to be gendered.

Hypothesis 4

Patterns in partner preferences which have been found across societies should be present among Chinese youth, namely, concern about physical appearance, economic prospects, and kind or compassionate personality of future potential spouses.

In addition to the above broad hypotheses, we also expect older students and those who are religious to be slightly more conservative. Students who perform well academically might use that strength as a bargaining chip. Men could use it as an asset to be sold on the dating and marriage market while women could use it as a signifier of them possessing egalitarian values and seeking like-minded mates. It should be noted that in the USA, students who exhibit high levels of dating behavior in high school are less likely to be academic high achievers.

Data and methods

Data for this study were collected during the summer of at a large public university in Shanghai, China. A random sample of students were approached and asked to participate in a survey concerning dating and romantic relationships. Of those approached, 87 % agreed to participate and completed the survey. After tabulation of the responses, 17 cases were eliminated due to incomplete responses, resulting in a sample of students ( females and males). The students ranged in age from 18 to 22 and were all currently enrolled at the university. All of the students in the sample were single and never married. Among females,  % described themselves as “currently dating someone,” while  % of males described themselves as likewise.

A variety of questions were used to assess respondents’ attitudes, preferences, and aspirations concerning dating and intimate relationships. In regard to dating, respondents were asked to respond to the statement, “I would like to date more frequently than I do now.” Responses ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5). Participants were also queried concerning their willingness to either kiss or have sex on a first date. Respondents were offered the statements: (1) “I would be willing to kiss on a first date” and (2) I would be willing to have sex on a first date.” Responses again ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5). Together, these items provide a broad range of assessment concerning dating and intimate relationships.

Respondents were also asked about a variety of family and individual characteristics. In terms of their parents, participants were asked about the educational attainment of their mothers and fathers. The higher of the two (when two parents were present) was then included as a measure of the highest parental education, with responses including “eighth grade or less” (1), “beyond the eighth grade but did not complete high school” (2), “high school degree” (3), “attended college but did not finish degree” (4), “four-year college degree” (5), and “graduate or professional degree” (6). Maternal employment was also assessed, with respondents being queried about whether their mother was employed for pay outside the home (yes = 1, no = 0). Since the familial context is likely to influence both dating and marriage patterns among young adults, participants were asked: “For most of the time when you were growing up, did you think your parents’ marriage was not too happy (1), just about average (2), happier than average (3), or very happy (4).” Since western culture could potentially affect dating and marriage patterns among Chinese young adults, the respondents were also queried as to whether English was spoken in their homes (1 = yes, 0 = no). In regard to parental influence, participants were offered the following statement: “I would be willing to date someone of whom my parents/family did not approve.” Responses ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5).

Individual characteristics were also examined within the survey. Respondents were asked to provide their age and sex but were also asked a variety of other questions related to their own traits. Respondents were asked how often they attended religious services, with responses ranging from “do not attend” (1) to “once or more per week” (6). A basic measure of self-esteem was included, using responses to the statement: “On the whole, I am satisfied with myself.” Responses ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5). In regard to attitudes, respondents were asked about their beliefs concerning gender roles within the family context. The statements used in creating an index of gender attitudes included the following: (1) it is much better for everyone if the man earns the main living and the woman takes care of the home and family, 2) both husbands and wives should contribute to family income, 3) a husband should spend just as many hours doing housework as his wife, and 4) the spouse who earns the most money should have the most say in family decisions. Responses to each of these statements ranged from “strongly disagree” to “strongly agree.” After inverting the coding schemes, the resultant combined measure of gender attitudes ranged across a five-point scale, with a higher score indicating more conservative/traditional gender role attitudes (Cronbach’s alpha = ). Respondents were similarly asked about their pro-natalist attitudes by being asked to respond to the statement: “a person can have a fully satisfying life without having children.” Responses ranged from “strongly agree” (1) to “strongly disagree” (5). A measure of school performance was also included, with respondents describing their overall grade performance. Responses ranged from “less than D’s” (1) to “mostly A’s” (8).

Given the complex nature of dating and dating relationships, multiple measures were utilized in these analyses. In regard to dating experiences, respondents were asked “thinking back about all of the dating experiences you’ve had, how long was the longest romantic relationship you have had?” Responses to this item ranged from “less than a week” (1) to “more than a year” (9). A measure of respondents’ willingness to date outside of their own social groups was included through the combination of responses to three different questions. Respondents were asked if, in terms of dating partners, they would be willing to date someone from (1) a different religion, (2) a different race or ethnicity, and (3) a different country. The responses to each item ranged from “yes,” “no,” and “maybe.” Affirmative responses (“yes”) to each were then combined to create a measure of desired heterogamy (Cronbach’s alpha = ), with a range of 0 to 3. Participants were asked how many of their close friends were currently dating or in a romantic relationship. Responses to this question ranged from “only a few or none of them” (1) to “all or almost all of them” (5). Participants were subsequently asked about the specific characteristics which they are looking for in a partner. Respondents were asked to indicate their preference for particular traits by stating whether each quality was “not at all important” (1) to “extremely important” (7). Of the particular traits which were queried, some were used to create indexed measures of a broader set of characteristics. The first of these, pragmatic, is created through the combination of four traits: well educated, wealthy, successful, and ambitious (Cronbach’s alpha = ). The second, caring, is created through the combination of the following four traits: affectionate, loving, considerate, and kind (Cronbach’s alpha = ). The third, appearance, is created from the combination of four traits: sexy, neat, attractive, and well dressed (Cronbach’s alpha = ). Together, these three measures provide a broader assessment of qualities which the respondents might desire in a potential partner.

Results

Table 1 presents the mean levels of dating and marriage characteristics among young Chinese adults, by sex. As shown, an overwhelming majority of both young women and men would prefer to date more frequently. Approximately 66 % of women and 71 % of men expressed the desire to date more often. Given the age of participants in the sample, this is to be expected. In terms of dating behaviors, however, significant differences are shown between the two sexes. Respondents were queried about their willingness to kiss on a first date. Here, significantly more men, as compared to women, stated that they would be willing to kiss on a first date. It should be noted, nonetheless, that approximately 39 % of Chinese women and 42 % of men did not express a willingness to kiss on a first date. This finding would appear to suggest the more traditional Chinese cultural expectations pertaining to dating are still influencing dating attitudes and behaviors among contemporary young adults. This possibility is further enforced by the responses shown in regard to participants’ willingness to have sex on a first date. Although young Chinese men are shown to be significantly more willing to have sex on a first date, as compared to young women, almost two thirds of the women and more than a third of the men stated that they would not do so. Hence, while young men may be significantly more likely to be willing to kiss and/or have sex on a first date, as compared to women, it would appear that many, if not most, young men still adhere to a more traditional or conservative approach to dating.

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Table 2 presents the mean levels of family and individual characteristics among young Chinese adults, by sex. As shown, the parents of both young women and men were reported to have a relatively high level of educational attainment, with the typical parent having at least some college. Among women, approximately 83 % reported that their mother was employed outside the home, while the corresponding employment rate among men’s mothers was 77 %. Both young women and men reported that their parents had relatively high marital quality. Assuming that these responses are reliable, it would suggest that most young Chinese adults have had positive role models concerning spousal roles and relationships. English was spoken only in a small percentage of homes (13 % of women’s families and 14 % of men’s). Familial influence appears to be slightly less influential among young men, as significantly more reported that they would be willing to date someone without their parents’ approval, as compared to women. This finding is somewhat intriguing, as given the patriarchal nature of Chinese culture, one might anticipate parents being more cautious and involved in the dating behaviors of their sons, as compared to daughters.

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Men in the sample were shown to be slightly older than the women ( versus  years of age, respectively). In regard to religiosity, most respondents reported participating in religious activities only a few times each year. Self-esteem levels reported by the respondents were moderately high, with no significant differences shown between women and men. Neither sex appeared to be overly anxious to become parents, as their relative responses to the query concerning pro-natalist attitudes was somewhat low. This is not entirely unanticipated, as one would tend to believe that college students do not place parenthood high among their priorities at their age. It is worth noting that young men do espouse significantly more conservative attitudes concerning gender and gender roles within the family, in particular. Again, given the more patriarchal nature of Chinese culture, this is to be expected.

In terms of dating, young men reported having had longer relationships in the past, as compared to young women. In order to put this in context, however, it should be noted that the men’s longest relationships, on average, had lasted only a few months. Approximately half of the friends of both women and men were reported to be currently dating. Hence, there is a potential for considerable peer pressure, in regard to dating behaviors. In regard to potential dating partners, young Chinese women and men appear to be only marginally willing to consider partners from outside their own social groups (i.e., religion, race/ethnicity, and nationality). This may be a reflection of the lack of diversity within China and certainly as compared to countries with more diverse populations.

Table 3 presents the mean levels of desired partner characteristics, as presented for females and males. In terms of specific partner characteristics, young women expressed a significantly higher preference for pragmatic qualities, as compared to men ( versus , respectively). Across all four of the components, females’ preferences in a male partner where significantly higher than those of their male counterparts. Females expressed a significantly higher preference for a male partner who is well educated, wealthy, successful, and ambitious. While not statistically significant, women also expressed a slightly higher preference for caring qualities. It is necessary to note, however, that females did express a significantly greater preference for a male partner who was kind, as compared to their male counterparts’ same preference in a female partner. In regard to appearance, while men expressed a slightly higher preference for appearance qualities, as compared to women, the difference was not significantly different, overall. Men did express a significantly higher preference for a female partner who is “sexy,” as compared to the preferences expressed by women for the same quality in a male partner. Overall, these desired characteristics seem to support previously noted gender stereotypes, with women expressing a stronger preference for more pragmatic qualities in a partner, while men, to a lesser extent, express a stronger preference for physical appearance. We will now examine how these various factors affect dating and intimate relationships characteristics.

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Table 4 presents the results of ordinary least squares regression models of dating characteristics among young Chinese adults. The models are presented separately for each sex, for each characteristic, so as to allow for a more direct comparison of the effects of familial and individual traits. Previous analyses (not shown) were performed to ascertain the need for separate models for each sex. In regard to wanting to date more frequently, females whose parents have a higher level of educational attainment are shown to have a lower desire to date (b = −). Given that Chinese culture places a premium upon educational attainment (Stevenson and Stigler ), this association may result from parents’ desire to see their children succeed (i.e., placing greater emphasis upon education, as opposed to intimate relationships). Females’ levels of self-esteem are positively associated with wanting to date more frequently (b = ), suggesting that self-assurance and confidence may play a substantial role in the dating patterns of young Chinese women. In a similar manner, women’s pro-natalist attitudes are positively associated with wanting to date more frequently (b = ). In regard to desired spousal qualities, a stronger desire for pragmatic qualities is significantly associated with wanting to date more often (b = ). The strength of this association may imply that Chinese women not only desire more pragmatic qualities in a spouse but perhaps also view dating itself in more pragmatic manner. Caring qualities, such a loving and kind partner, also yield a significant association with women’s wanting to date more frequently (b = ), but the association is relatively meager. Finally, women’s desire for appearance qualities is shown to be negatively associated with wanting to date more frequently. Hence, women who place a greater premium upon physical appearance may actually be less likely to want to date more often.

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In the comparable model of men’s wanting to date more often, pro-natalist attitudes yield a negative association (b = −), which is opposite to the same effect shown in the model for women. It is quite possible that men who espouse more pro-natalist attitudes (i.e., desire children) may be more selective in their dating behaviors, thereby reducing their desire to date many women. Young Chinese men who place more emphasis upon caring qualities in a spouse (b = ), on the other hand, are shown to have a greater desire to date often. This difference between women’s preference for pragmatic qualities and men’s preference for caring qualities will be addressed more fully in the discussion section.

Among women, parental educational attainment is significantly associated with the willingness to kiss on a first date (b = ). It is possible that higher parental educational attainment may also be linked with more progressive attitudes and expectations about dating, on the part of parents. Not surprisingly, women who state a willingness to date without parental approval are shown to be significantly more likely to kiss on a first date (b = ). Within the context of Chinese culture, both of these are likely to be considered progressive and contrary to traditional standards of behavior for young women. Young women also appear to be readily affected by their friends, as the number of friends dating is positively associated (b = ) with a willingness to kiss on a first date. However, self-esteem yields a negative association with women’s willingness to kiss on a first date (b = −), as does pro-natalist attitudes (b = −). Among young men, parental educational attainment reveals a negative association (b = −), which is directly contrary to the effect shown in the model for women. Clearly, the impact of parental characteristics varies, depending upon whether they involve sons or daughters. Older males are more likely to kiss on a first date (b = ), as are those who attend religious services more frequently (b = ). It is noteworthy that the desire for heterogamous relationships is positively associated with the willingness to kiss on a first date (b = ) among men, yet the same positive association is also shown in regard to conservative gender attitudes (b = ). This may possibly suggest that young men with a more traditional set of attitudes wish to have both ways—to date outside of their own social groups—yet maintain a more traditional (i.e., patriarchal) role within the relationship.

In regard to women’s willingness to have sex on a first date, the willingness to date without parental approval yields a positive association (b = ), as does the number of friends who are dating (b = ). Since having sex on a first date represents a more tangible breech of traditional standards, it is logical that women must also be willing to break away from parents’ expectations. Along the same vein, having friends who are also dating may provide the social support and reinforcement which make having sex on a first date seem more acceptable to young Chinese women. However, women’s self-esteem, along with their pro-natalist attitudes, yields negative associations with the willingness to have sex on a first date (b = − and −, respectively). Having higher self-esteem, then, may provide women with the confidence or security to not have sex on a first date, whereas lower levels of self-esteem may bring about the opposite. The stronger desire to have children, likewise, may lead young women to be more selective in their dating behaviors or perhaps they may be more likely to associate sex with a more stable and lasting relationship (such as marriage). Among males, the overall robustness of the regression model is not as strong. However, conservative gender attitudes are shown to be positively associated with men’s willingness to have sex on a first date (b = ). Again, this may be related to the patriarchal roles found within broader Chinese culture, such that young men with more traditional gender attitudes may believe that they should assume a stronger role in the decision-making behaviors involved in dating and dating relationships. The implications of these findings will now be addressed.

Discussion and conclusions

This study was initiated to provide an exploration of dating and mate selection traits among young adults in contemporary China. The sample used for these analyses is a relatively small and select one and does not necessarily provide for making broad generalizations to the larger population of young adults in China. However, the findings shown herein do offer fresh insight into both the nature of dating experiences and some of the pertinent gender differences which exist.

Overall, both young Chinese women and men expressed a desire to date more frequently, suggesting that the more progressive notions of love and romance may be taking hold within Chinese culture. With the increasing influence of individualism and consumerism, it is not entirely unexpected that Chinese youth should wish to emulate behaviors which they believe to be more “modern” or “western.” Despite their seeming eagerness to be more active in seeking dating partners, there also appears to be considerable adherence to more traditional culture expectations. Specifically, only the minority of both females and males expressed a willingness to have sex on a first date. This pattern is certainly more consistent with traditional expectations concerning what is appropriate behavior for young adults in intimate relationships. As expected, significantly more males than females expressed the willingness to have sex on a first date, yet even among males, more expressed opposition, rather than a willingness to do so. This would again seem to support the existence of long-standing expectations concerning dating. Unlike more westernized beliefs concerning dating, sex and sexual behavior still appear to be outwardly undesired by young Chinese adults of either sex. This conclusion is further supported by the unwillingness of both females and males to kiss on a first date. Once again, more males expressed a willingness to do so, yet substantially more males were clearly opposed to this. While these data are intended to provide an exploratory examination of dating attitudes and behaviors, these findings do suggest that both traditional and more progressive elements are concurrently present in the dating traits of contemporary Chinese young adults.

Gender differences were also noted in regard to the desired partner characteristics, as expressed by females and males. In keeping with long-standing gender stereotypes, females did express a greater preference for more pragmatic qualities in a male partner (i.e., well educated, wealthy, successful, and ambitious). This supports previous research which has noted such gender-based distinctions. Chinese men, on the hand, only partially conformed to the gender stereotypes for males. Although men did express a greater preference for a “sexy” female partner, no significant differences were shown for the other attributes related to appearance. Hence, while it would appear that a double standard does exist in regard to desired partner attributes, the more stereotyped expectations are found among women and less so among men.

The multivariate models yielded several rather intriguing findings. In particular, it was shown that Chinese women have a greater desire to date more frequently when they have more pragmatic desires in a prospective partner. Chinese men, on the other hand, have a greater desire to date more frequently when they desire a partner with more caring qualities. On the surface, these two patterns offer some substantiation of the traditional gender-typed beliefs that men are seeking love and romance from dating (and from eventual marriage), while women are perhaps regarding dating as a pathway to marriage and the subsequent security (e.g., financial) offered within. Obviously, additional study is necessary in order to more accurately discern and understand these patterns. These findings do lend support to exchange theory, as each sex does appear to be approaching dating and intimate relationships with somewhat different perceptions and goals.

The potential for more progressive (and westernized) traits can also be seen within the models concerning kissing and having sex on a first date. Among females, the regression models revealed that a willingness to date without parental approval (which would be directly counter to traditional cultural expectations) was shown to be associated with a greater willingness to both kiss and have sex on a first date. Essentially, breaking away from parental control is associated with greater sexual expression among young Chinese women. This would certainly be consistent with a tendency toward greater individualism, as suggested previously. In addition, women were shown to be more likely to kiss and/or have sex on a first date when they had more friends who were also dating. Once, again, this suggests a strong peer influence, perhaps part of a broader new youth subculture, which is generally considered to be antithetical to parental and familial influence. Finally, women with pro-natalist attitudes (i.e., seeking to have children, one day) were shown to be considerably less willing to kiss and/or have sex on a first date. If the maternal role can be considered to be a more traditional role for women, it would appear that young Chinese women are giving significant priority to the later role of motherhood, as opposed to indulging in more immediate sexual behaviors in the context of dating.

Overall, these findings suggest that contemporary Chinese youth are perhaps forging a path somewhere between the expectations of traditional Chinese culture and the more progressive expectations of an ever-changing modern society. Youth are often at the “cutting edge” of social change, and their attitudes and expectations are often portrayed as being directly contradictory to and even boldly challenging those of their parents. These results do not suggest that a polarized set of expectations are present; instead, it would appear that Chinese youth have found a balance between the two and appear to be content with the combination. As stated previously, while researchers have directed considerable efforts toward better understanding the nature and dynamics of dating and mate selection among young adults, most of these efforts have involved Western samples. Hence, much of the theory and conceptual knowledge may not necessarily apply to non-Western samples. In particular, the appropriateness of applying of such existing theories and concepts to Asian cultures has been called into question (Ho et al. ). The rapid economic and social change which is occurring in urban centers of China, such as Shanghai, will eventually be evident within the rest of the population, especially as the residential distribution shifts from a rural to an urban majority. Researchers should attempt to address how these ever-shifting social, economic, and political changes will affect not only the dating experiences among the young adult population but also familial structures and behaviors in the longer term.

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Источник: [alovex.co]
November 11,

In her book American Hookup, Lisa Wade says, based on what some students of color told her, that “in some ways, hookup culture is a white thing.” In this blog post, we use data from an online survey from over 20, American students at 21 colleges and universities to explore what, if any, differences in sexual behavior or attitudes about sex exist between White, Black, Latinx, South Asian, and East Asian students.

What We Did

We used data from the Online College Social Life Survey (OCSLS), collected by Paula England between and , to compare White, Black, Latinx, East Asian, and South Asian students. (We call these racial groups for brevity, realizing that Latinx is sometimes considered an ethnicity rather than a race.) We examined racial differences separately for men and women and compared groups on attitudes and behaviors. The percents, means, or medians in the graphs below are regression-adjusted to remove any part of racial differences that stems from group differences in age, immigrant status, mother’s education, whether their parents are still together, school, height, and body mass index (BMI). For more details on our models, see the Technical Appendix at the end of this post.

Some Attitudes Show Almost No Racial Differences

On some values and aspirations, racial groups seem remarkably alike. As the two graphs below show, between 90% and 93% of those in every race/gender group of both men and women say they want to marry, and between 89% and 96% of every group want children.

Racial groups also differ little in their ideas of the best age to do these things, with the average age seen as ideal for marriage between 25 and 28 for all groups and the average ideal age for having a first child between 27 and Also, racial groups have in common that, in each group, compared to women, men see a slightly higher age as appropriate for themselves to take on these roles.

One attitude about hooking up also shows virtually no racial differences: in all groups, approximately 70%% of men and women say they would be less interested in a relationship with a person who hooks up a lot, as this graph shows.

Racial Group Differences in Attitudes About Sex

Some attitudes show significant differences by race. One question asked students how much they agree with this statement: “I would not have sex with someone unless I was in love with them.” In every racial group, more women than men agree. Focusing on racial differences, Whites and Blacks are similar in their response, and these two groups are most positive about sex without love, as the graph below shows. Latinx students are more conservative. Asian students are the most conservative in their belief that sex requires love. As the graph shows, among women, white and black women are equally liberal, with only 49% agreeing that sex requires love. A larger 59% of Latinas, 64% of East Asian women, and 76% of South Asian women agree.

Those who believe sex requires love presumably disapprove of casual sex but might think that sex among students in relationships is okay. A more conservative standard is disapproving of any sex before marriage, even in a serious relationship. The graph below shows that South Asians are the most conservative in believing that premarital sex is wrong, while Whites are the most liberal, with Latinx students very close to Whites. Unlike beliefs about whether love is necessary for sex, where Whites and Blacks were very close to each other, these beliefs about whether premarital sex is wrong show Black students to be substantially more conservative than Whites and Latinx students. On the issue of premarital sex, Blacks are closer to the conservative views of Asians, who are the most conservative.

Racial Group Differences in Sexual Behavior

Now we move to behavior, starting with the simplest measure—the percent of students who are still virgins. In our sample, in which the average student was in their second year of college, South Asians have the highest proportion of virgins: 66% of women and 50% of men had never had intercourse. The group with the next highest rate is East Asians. Whites, Blacks, and Latinx students all have lower rates of between 21% and 34% virgins.

Next, we look at the number of hookups since the start of college each group reported. We use the median (the number that the man or woman at the 50thpercentile had) rather than the mean (the average) because the median is less influenced by the few students who reported extremely high numbers of hookups. Among men, Asians have the lowest number of hookups, with a median of one hook up, Latinx men are next with a little above two, and Whites and Blacks are the highest with almost identical medians at approximately three hookups. Among women, we Black and East or South Asian women have hooked up little, Latinx women are in the middle, White women have hooked up the most. While this shows that hooking up is most prevalent among whites, it also shows that it is certainly not only a “white thing.” Indeed, among men, as we saw it is done about the same amount by Black and White men.

Of course, knowing the rate at which students are hooking up does not tell us how much they have casual intercourse, because not all hookups involve intercourse.  As students define the term “hookup,” a hookup may involve little or even nothing more than making out, and these data show that about 40% of hookups involve intercourse. To get at whether students had had casual intercourse, the survey asked if they had ever had sex outside of an exclusive relationship. The question didn’t clarify what was meant by “sex.” However, there is lots of qualitative evidence that heterosexual students usually take the term to mean intercourse, whereas a majority of what they call hookups do not involve intercourse.

As the next graph shows, Asians are the least likely to have had sex outside an exclusive relationship.  This is partly a reflection of the fact that many haven’t had intercourse at all, as we saw above. Black, White, and Latinx students have had more casual intercourse, and within-sex, race differences are fairly small in these three groups.  In every group other than East Asians, men are more likely to report sex outside a relationship than women.

Another behavioral indicator is the number of partners with whom one has ever had intercourse. In this analysis, virgins count as having zero partners, and we limited the count to the number of partners of the other sex, ignoring any same-sex partners. We examine medians rather than averages because there are some extreme outliers with many partners, which affect means more than medians. The graph below shows that among both women and men, Asians have had the least number of partners. Among women, there is little difference between Whites, Blacks, and Latinas, all of whom have had between and 2 partners. Among men, however, Blacks have substantially more than other men, with a median slightly more than 4, compared to between 2 and for Whites and Latinx men, and less for Asian men.

Explaining Racial Differences and Race-Gender Intersections

We have shown that racial groups are virtually identical on whether and when they want to marry and have alovex.cor, there are some group differences in attitudes about students having sex, and in their sexual behavior.

Where we see differences, Asians, especially South Asians, appear the most conservative in attitudes and behavior, Latinx students are in the middle, and either Whites or Blacks are generally the most permissive, depending on the issue. In this blog post, we can’t fully answer the complicated questions of what causes these differences, but we offer some ideas, with some data to back them up.

Over 95% of both the East Asian and South Asian students in our study are either first- or second-generation immigrants – that is, either they were themselves born outside the U.S., or one or both of their parents were. We speculate that the relatively conservative attitudes and less active sexual behavior of Asians result from the influence of their immigrant parents from Asia. Fewer, but a still high 82%, of the Latinx students in our study are first- or second-generation immigrants, so this explanation may apply somewhat to them as well. By contrast, only 16% of Whites and 35% of Black students in the study are immigrants or had an immigrant parent. (See the technical appendix for more details on this.)

As for differences between Blacks and other racial groups, the patterns differ strongly by gender. As many race and gender scholars have argued, an intersectional approach is often needed when the way race affects men and women is very different. Let us start with men. Black men have had more sexual partners than White or other men. What explains this?  Prior research has shown that youth of any race who grow up in poverty or with less educated parents are more likely to have first intercourse earlier and Blacks are especially likely to grow up disadvantaged. Consistent with this, past research on the age of sexual debut among US adolescents, has shown that Black youth have an earlier age at first intercourse than Whites, which is likely to lead to more sexual experience by the age of most of the college respondents. (The survey question asks about number of partners ever, not only during college, so having started during or before high school could lead to a higher lifetime number.)

The difference between White and Black men’s median partners is —with Black men having a median of and White men partners. To test how much of this is explained by Black men having had an earlier age at first intercourse, we re-estimated the regression analysis controlling for this factor and created adjusted medians assigning the age at first intercourse for the sample as a whole to all races of men. The new adjusted median number of partners is only .7 apart rather than apart, implying that about two-thirds of the gap is explained by differences in age at first intercourse. Thus, the White-Black differences among men may reflect less about different behavior at college and more about the early effects of disadvantage leading to early first sex.

However, if the explanation we offered for Black men were just about socioeconomic disadvantage, we would expect to find it applicable to Black women too. Instead, we found that Black women students are significantly more likely to be virgins than White women, they have had about the same number of intercourse partners as White women, and they have had substantially fewer hookups than either White women or Latinas. Moreover, they are more likely to think premarital sex is wrong than any race-gender group other than South Asian women. Why are Black women more conservative than other racial groups on many indicators, while Black men are more liberal? We suggest two possible explanations. It may be in part because Black women are aware of stereotypes of Blacks as hypersexual, and, given the gendered double standard that shames women more than men for casual sex, black women may feel the responsibility to behave in a way that doesn’t reinforce racial stereotypes usually seen as pejorative. A second possible explanation for the fact that Black women are more likely to be virgins and have fewer hookups is that Black women may be less sought after as partners than women of other races, a race-gender-specific bias in the erotic hierarchy.

 

Technical Appendix: Data, Measures, and Statistical Procedures

Data

We used data from the Online College Social Life Survey (OCSLS). The OCSLS surveyed over 20, students from 21 four-year colleges and universities between and The colleges and universities where the survey was administered were both private and public.

A limitation of the OCSLS survey is that participants surveyed did not come from a probability sample. However, because the instructors in the courses hosting the survey gave students extra credit, participation in these classes was nearly %. Thus, any non-representativeness of the sample is likely caused by the schools chosen and the kinds of students in the hosting courses, not who decided to participate within classes. Also helpful to the representativeness of the sample is the fact that, although the hosting classes were mostly sociology, only approximately 10% of respondents were sociology majors.

Students were asked their race or ethnicity, which we used to divide them into White, Black, Latinx, East Asian, or South Asian. (Students in other groups, such as Native American, were not used because other groups were too small for reliable analyses.)

The outcome measures used are questions about sexual behavior and attitudes.

Attitudes

We used the following questions (see bullets below) to tap attitudes and values regarding sex.

  • If a man and a woman have sexual relations before marriage, do you think it is wrong?

For this question, we divided students into two groups—those who chose “not wrong at all,” the most permissive answer, and those who took the more restrictive view that premarital sex is ‘always,’ ‘almost always,’ or ‘sometimes’ wrong.

  • If someone has hooked up a lot, I&#;m less interested in this person as a potential girl/boyfriend.
  • I would not have sex with someone unless I was in love with them.

For the two questions above, response categories were; strongly agree, agree, disagree, or strongly disagree. We divided the responses into a more permissive group who disagreed or strongly disagreed and a more restrictive group who agreed or strongly agreed.

  • Do you want to get married in the future? 

Respondents answered yes, no, don’t know, or already married. We deleted those already married then dichotomized into those who said yes, versus those who said no or don’t know.

  • Do you want to have children (or more children) in the future?

Respondents answered yes or no.

  • How old would you ideally like to be when you get married?
  • How old would you ideally like to be when you have children (or more children)?

Respondents who wanted to get married or have children gave an exact age for the two questions above.

Behavior 

Regarding sexual behavior and hooking up, students were asked:

  • How many people have you had intercourse with?
  • Have you ever had intercourse outside of an exclusive relationship?

Responses were yes and no.

  • Since you started college, how many people have you hooked up with in the case where you were not already in a romantic relationship with the person but you did know him or her?
  • Since you started college, how many people have you hooked up with whom you didn&#;t know before that night?

The numbers students gave for the two kinds of hookups above were added together to get their total number of hookups.

Models

The graphs above show regression-adjusted averages, medians, or percents. That is, these percents or numbers are predicted values from a regression predicting the attitude or behavior from: age (entered linearly), immigration status (categorized into whether the student was a first-generation immigrant, had at least one parent who was an immigrant, or was not an immigrant and did not have a parent who was), respondent’s mother’s education (high school only, less than high school, some college, bachelor’s degree, graduate degree), whether respondent’s parents are still together, indicators for school attended, height, and body mass index (BMI).

Using the regression equations, for each outcome we predicted a mean, median, or percent for each racial group, using an average marginal effects approach, such that each racial group was assigned the whole sample distribution of all control variables, thus giving each group the same distribution on these controls, and thus “controlling for” these factors. In the case of predicted averages and percents, the regression was an OLS regression. Where the variable was a dichotomy, this OLS is a linear probability model. In the case of medians, we used a conditional quantile regression. Separate regressions were done for men and women. Interestingly, racial group differences were very similar to those found in simple descriptive statistics on each group calculated with no regression adjustment.

In the post, we suggest that having immigrant parents from nations with somewhat more conservative sexual norms may explain the more conservative beliefs and behavior of South and East Asian students, and, to a lesser extent of Latinx students. The attentive reader may wonder why we say this when our model includes immigration status as a control variable, implying that the differences we find “hold immigration status constant.” Our model accomplishes this only if we assume that the effect of immigration status is constant across groups (technically, that there is no interaction between race and immigration status). However, our earlier posts Do Immigrants Have More Conservative Sexual Attitudes Than Other College Students? and What Does Studying College Sex Tell Us About Immigrant Assimilation? showed that this is not true.

Among whites, immigrant status has little effect on sexual attitudes or behavior, perhaps because white immigrants are mostly Canadians, Europeans, and Australians, and the sexual norms in these countries are not so different than those in the United States. Since Whites are the most numerous in the sample, the effects of immigration status that are used in the regression adjustment in this post, which are for the sample as a whole, are dominated by the small effects for whites. Thus, the model does not adequately adjust for the effect of having immigrant parents on Asian and Latinx students, leaving open the possibility that this may be the explanation for their more conservative sexual behavior.

In one supplementary model discussed above, to explore how much of the Black/White difference among men in number of intercourse partners is explained by an earlier age at first intercourse, we run an additional quantile regression for men predicting number of partners from all the variables in all the regressions discussed above, plus age at first vaginal intercourse (represented with indicator variables for “14 or younger,” “15 to 19,” and “20 or older,” which included virgins). We then used the regression results to predict number of partners separately for Black and White men assuming they each had the sample-wide distribution on age at first intercourse. (We also assumed they had the sample-wide mean on other variables, but that adjustment was already reflected in the graphs shown.)

Data Access

Researchers who wish to use the OCSLS data can contact Emma Mishel at ekm@alovex.co for information on how to download the data.

*Note: Numbers shown are means except when indicated that they are medians. In the case of dichotomized variables, the means (X) are the percent in the category indicated by the variable name.

*Note: Numbers shown are means except when indicated that they are medians. In the case of dichotomized variables, the means (X) are the percent in the category indicated by the variable name.


Emma Patton is an undergraduate Sociology major, Paula England is Silver Professor of Sociology, and Andrew Levine is a doctoral student in Sociology. All are at New York University.

Источник: [alovex.co]

When Asians say they’re not into Asian men

“I’m not into Asian men.” I can attribute this quote to several friends and acquaintances, and the funny thing is, many of them were Asian. 

Which begs the question: why? I sometimes ask that aloud. Usually the response would be a non-answer: silence, a topic change or “I don’t know, I’m just not into them.” 

I’m not saying that Asians alone are guilty of rejecting Asian men. If anything, we’re likelier than other groups to give them a chance. Nor should we feel obligated to constrain our options to Asian men. But too often, Asians are as guilty as anyone in refusing to see Asian men as sexual partners. And they don’t question why. 

Maybe it’s unfair of me to assume what you mean when you say you’re not into Asian men. But having been fed stereotypes about Asian men time after time, it’s not hard to put two and two together. What might just seem like a harmless non-preference for people of your own race may really just be the result of internalized self-racism. 

Apparently as Asians, we are, as a collective, small, meek and effeminate. This means that we Asian women — as an Uber driver told me once — are “real ladies,” with tight fits, small, pliable bodies and no opinions. 

The men, meanwhile, aren’t manly enough. They’re supposedly not “well endowed,” and as Asians, they’ve been raised to be quiet and submissive. Useful qualities for women, hence our charm! But not so for men. 

Perhaps you buy into other myths about Asians. That we’re racist and homophobic. That we’re book-smart but out of touch with politics. That we aren’t creative or good conversationalists. Those are all unattractive qualities. But just as these stereotypes do not define you, they do not define the men who look like you. 

You might already know that these stereotypes are nonsense. You might protest that you’re not into Asian men not because you’re racist. How can you be, anyway, when you yourself are Asian? It’s just a natural preference, you like “manly men,” you can’t help it, and besides, you have Asian male friends. You’re just not interested in having sex with them. 

It’s worth it, however, to take a moment to examine this “natural” preference for non-Asian men. To acknowledge that somewhere deep down, you may have internalized these stereotypes and that rejecting men because of their ethnicity, because they’re Asian, is racism. To also examine the sociocultural factors you grew up with and know that it’s not entirely your fault. 

Growing up, most of the media I consumed was in English, so most of the romantic male leads I was familiar with were white men in white movies. My experience with Asian males (or males really) was mostly limited to relatives and immature pubescent boys in my predominantly Korean school. So the white fictional characters that I fell in love with were my models for how I felt male partners should be. 

When there were Asian male characters in Western media, they were typically a source of comic relief — sometimes offensive — or some sort of professional (like a doctor) who was more or less an expositional prop. They were at best likable, at worst stereotypical. They were rarely romantic, rarely sexy. 

It’s true that, American media aside, the world is becoming more interested in Asian entertainment. But even representation within Asian media leaves something to be desired. In Korea, there are only so many different kinds of bodies entertainment industries favor, and lately, they like their men slim and androgynous. That may feed into the myth that Asian men are inherently small and effeminate. Maybe that sort of physicality doesn’t appeal to you. But remember that these men are only a sliver of the Asian male population. 

You might also want to ask yourselves: If you’re not interested in Asian men, who are you interested in? White men? That’s part of why white men are so obsessed with Asian women, after all — apparently with them, we’re easy. And all too often, for Asian women with conservative families, they’re the only other racial group that we can get away with marrying. 

The ugly truth is, some of our friends and family see having white friends as some sort of social advancement. Oh, you have white friends in college? You’re so cultured. You’re dating a white man? Wow [Average Joe] is so handsome, you’re so lucky, I want one too. 

Maybe you’re turned off by the idea of marrying into a family that takes traditions you’re no longer in touch with seriously. Maybe you grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood and like what’s familiar. 

Or maybe you’re making a conscious, well-meaning decision to reject the toxic obsession with so-called blood purity that pervades some of our cultures. Maybe you’re not into Asian men but you actually don’t like putting white men on a pedestal either. You go for other minorities and pride yourself in being “rebellious” and “open-minded.” 

But maybe it’s time for you to look at people as individuals. Maybe people are more than ethnicities or cultures to reject or try. 

Maybe, when you say “I’m not into Asian men,” you’re reinforcing harmful myths about men who look like you. Maybe you’re even reinforcing myths about yourself. Maybe it’s time you realize: Asian men can be as sexy as other men. And once you’ve realized that, remind yourself that you, as an Asian, can be sexy too. 

Sarah Y. Kim is a junior double-majoring in Writing Seminars and International Studies from Walnut Creek, Calif. She is the Opinions Editor.

Tags: opinion, trending

Источник: [alovex.co]

Conservative woman dating asian man - remarkable, this

My first crush was in kindergarten. It was unrequited love. We weren’t friends per se, but would often play tag at recess together. I would always try and tag him because I thought that was the way to let him know I liked him. But someone must have told him of my feelings, because one day, the minute I got near him on the playground, my classmate turned around and screamed, “I don’t like you, Chinawoman!” It was my first rejection.

Dating, romance, love, and sex — for me, these concepts have always been irrevocably intertwined with my social identities as an East Asian woman. From the tropes of the hypersexualized “dragon lady” to the “mail-order bride,” the image of Asian women in the West has typically been represented in the sexual, and strictly divided down the lines of a cunning prostitute-assassin, or a docile foreign wife.

These stereotypes and the culture of Orientalization have existed for some time, but it has always seemed like white America never felt their gravity until the events of this past year — the rise in anti-Asian hate crimes and specifically the aftermath of the Atlanta spa shootings. In the discourse, the killer’s defense of having a “sex addiction” was repeated over and over. How could this be? How could it have come to this point?

Maybe my classmate didn’t mean to cast a racial slur at me. After all, we were five. But this is far from one isolated story. The umbrella blanket term of AAPI — Asian American Pacific Islander — conceals the fact that Asian American women of different ethnicities are impacted by fetishization, hypersexualization, and othering in very unique ways. To reflect on the racial impacts of the COVID pandemic and white America’s rude awakening to the harms of (one facet of) AAPI stereotyping, Teen Vogue spoke to three young East Asian women about their experiences with love and sex, and where they intersect with race and gender.

Editor’s note: These conversations have been condensed and lightly edited for clarity.


Teen Vogue: Hi, everyone! Would you like to introduce yourselves?

Linda Tang: My name is Linda. I’m 17, and a first-generation Asian American. I live in a small, conservative, majority-white town in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

Melissa Lee: I’m Melissa. I am a year-old, first-generation Chinese American from Massachusetts. I have been living in Los Angeles since graduating from college in Boston.

Miri Hoshino: I’m Miri. I’m 22 and a second-generation Japanese American, currently based in New York.

Who was your first crush?

Miri: My first real crush was in the first grade, on this kid named Evan. He had moved from out of state and looked like Harry Potter.

Melissa: It was also first grade. His name was Michael. He was Caucasian, a triplet, and we shared many of the same friends up until college.

Linda: My first crush was on an Asian boy in sixth grade. He was…the only Asian boy in my grade.

Источник: [alovex.co]

How a liberal learned to respect conservative thinking
(and accept the fact that, yes, the right is happier than the left)

“Management went apoplectic,” the woman said. “Sure, they said my hair wasn’t relevant to my job performance; they agreed I did my job well. But I had to dye it back.”

The group nodded and rolled their eyes in sympathetic outrage. The owner of the hair didn’t even interact with the public! The business didn’t have a published dress code! To redye hair, it has to be bleached, and that’s a health risk!

I kept quiet. Like others who grew up in an age of personal freedom, I, too, reasoned, “Back off. I’m not hurting anyone else by doing x.”

Inside, however, I was coming down on the side of management, and here’s why: dyeing your hair purple as a something shows a lack of respect to your managers and fellow employees. It makes you stand out. You are defiantly not fitting in with the group. You are imposing on others by shrieking, “Look at me!”

I was also aware that my thoughts about the purple hair incident were very different from what they would have been a few years ago. They were changed by several things, but the most powerful forces were my readings in social and cross-cultural psychology and my experiences in other cultures.

Overseas Education

It was May Weeks earlier I had returned from a semester-long sabbatical in China, where I had traveled with my Taiwanese doctoral student for two research projects, both about language, but quite different. One project studied the cognitive processing underlying reading Chinese script, and the other involved interviews and questionnaires on the comfort and frequency of use of the phrase Wo ai ni (I love you). My husband and I had lived in rented apartments, and I’d traveled by bus or bike to meet every day with student assistants. I’d hung out in parks with my laptop, writing my academic papers, observing people playing and exercising, trying to communicate with interested locals who wanted to have their first conversation with an American.

Once, during a visit to a local Starbucks, I was startled to see a woman, a foreigner, who appeared to have some sort of facial dysmorphology. The bony protuberances of her cheekbones made me try to remember the name of the disease that could cause it. Then something clicked. She was a normal woman with a strong nose and cheekbones, characteristically Germanic features.

It turned out that three months of living as the rare Caucasian in Chinese neighborhoods had reconfigured my face recognition system (think of fumbling for words in your native tongue when you’ve been daily using another language). Back in Massachusetts, my face recognition system had almost instantly popped back to its normal setting. But the China trip had sensitized me to the virtue of minimizing individualist displays and respecting the desires of those above one in the social hierarchy. In the collectivist cultures of East Asia, people have been less concerned with expressing their individuality and more concerned about harmonious relations with others, including being sensitive to negative appraisal by others. One result is a well-behaved classroom of 30 preschoolers led by one teacher and an assistant.

As I sat at dinner with my female friends, I thought about the subtle power of social norms and respect for authority. In addition to the lessons of living in China, I remembered social psychologist (and author of the book Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion) Jonathan Haidt’s five foundations of morality. I’d admired Haidt’s work since I started assigning his New Yorker video to my cross-cultural psychology and cognitive psychology classes. Haidt had once given a colloquium to my department and visited my lab. In recent years the New York University professor has become something of a rock star of social psychology, largely because of his persuasive analysis of the value systems of liberals and of conservatives. Haidt proposes that the moral worldview of liberals focuses on justice and fairness, with equal treatment for all, and on care vs. harm, which involves having compassion for others. Political conservatives also have these values, says Haidt, but they are influenced by three other moral systems: respect for hierarchy, favoring one’s in-group over the out-group, and valuing purity (a complex concept that involves sexual propriety, nobility, and avoiding disgusting objects).

The idea that different groups embrace different value systems was, of course, not new, but prior to reading Haidt I had considered respect for authority, in-group favoritism, and purity to be components of collectivist cultural groups, which are usually associated with developing nations and are often described in opposition to the individualist values that are hallmarks of modern, developed regions (especially North America, Europe, and Australia). Collectivism is widespread throughout the rest of the world, particularly in what researchers call small scale societies, but it is also present in large and well organized societies such as China, where traditional values and wisdoms from premodern times, such as Confucian teachings, remain influential.

Neither System Is Better

When I teach these concepts in a cross-cultural psychology class, I typically ask students to discuss “crosscultural teasers” like these:

A researcher in Turkey is helping you translate your sociological questionnaire into Turkish, but she claims that a question on homelessness won’t be understood because homelessness does not exist in Turkey.

Many Americans think it is good for all teenagers to have an after-school job, but Indians feel this should be done only if the family needs the money.

An American entrepreneur explains to his elderly Polish relatives that his son has succeeded in business without having his father pull any strings or offer any financial assistance. The Polish relatives are horrified.

A graduate student from Kazakhstan has to forgo completing her PhD to return home to earn money so that her nephews can finish high school.

Americans are urged to say “I love you” regularly to family members; many Chinese young adults say their parents have never once said “Wo ai ni” to them.

I spent years holding conservative values in contempt. Not care about global warming?Harmful, wrong, and unfair!

The Turks, Indians, elderly Polish, Kazakhs, and Chinese presumably grew up in cultures where a premium was placed on sharing resources with in-group members, and where family members are expected to subordinate their own goals to those of the group. In contrast, individualistic societies are tolerant of nonconformity and celebrate the pursuit of one’s individual goals and self-expression. The kind of urban living that most of us experience, for example, offers options that reduce the need to rely on other people. If there is a hour convenience store down the street (or if you have a car and can stock up on supplies), then you don’t need to knock on your neighbor’s door to borrow a cup of sugar. City dwellers usually have bank and insurance accounts, which means we don’t have to store up favors with friends to be assured of having their back when an emergency hits. In fact, many Americans recall being warned not to loan money to friends, because that puts friendships in danger. In contrast, my Turkish collaborator, Ayse Aycicegi-Dinn, explains that Turkish friends loan money to deepen mutual obligations while avoiding paying interest to banks.

Cross-cultural psychologists do not view either individualism or collectivism as inherently superior or inferior. They understand that each system has evolved to solve the problem of how individuals can benefit from living in groups, and they see both systems as having pros and cons. Individualist societies like ours allow people to pursue their dreams (pro), but when big aspirations crumble because of bad luck or intense competition, they may lack a safety net, either in terms of government services or family support (con). In individualistic societies, transactions are abstract and conveniently monetized (pro). But when we don’t trade our labor and time with our neighbors for mutual benefit, we miss an opportunity for friendships to be built around helping each other (con). And indeed, friendships in individualist societies are typically many, diverse, and often shallow. They are easily initiated and routinely abandoned, as when, for example, we choose to relocate for a better paying job.

In collectivist societies, the familial ties and deep friendships that arise from never leaving your hometown and investing daily in relationship management provide a buffer against loneliness and depression. The downside is that collectivist cultures can have an oppressive small-town mentality that punishes nonconformists who challenge religious, gender, or sex role norms.

As a liberal, I spent many years holding conservative values in contempt. Not care about global warming? Exploit and vilify immigrants? Hold men and women to different standards of sexual behavior? Dismiss those living in poverty? Enact legislation to help those who were already successful keep their wealth? Harmful, wrong, and unfair!

So what hit me so hard when reading the work of Jonathan Haidt was the realization that the three moral systems that liberals disavow, but conservatives embrace (that is, respect for authority, prioritizing in-group members, purity) are the hallmarks of the collectivist value systems I learned about as part of doing cross-cultural research and living overseas. My current and more sympathetic understanding is that the central goal of collectivist societies (and social conservatism as a political ideology) is reserving resources for the in-group, a strategy that was necessary in earlier eras when the neighboring tribe was encroaching on your territory and daily survival was often uncertain. Purity rules and emphasis on obedience to authority are tools that help small-scale societies increase group cohesion and survival.

Collaborating with Scholars On “the Other Side”

My research, my teaching, and my traveling showed me that for the majority of cultures that have thrived on our planet, socially conservative political views made a lot of sense. But what really made me more tolerant about “the other side” was when I started rubbing shoulders in a collaboration with scholars who self-identified as centrist, middle-of-the-road, politically moderate, religious, and even conservative. Theologian Wesley Wildman, a School of Theology professor, religious studies scholar, and wide-ranging thinker, asked me to become a research associate at the Institute for the Bio-Cultural Study of Religion. Sitting in meetings with fellow members of the institute’s Spectrums Project, whose goal is to find strategies for mitigating the problems associated with religious extremism and polarized religious discourse, allowed me to ask hard questions of people I respected. For example, why are ideological conservatives pro–big business, slashing food stamps in order to “shrink government” while subsidizing agribusiness?

Many scholars and thinkers have grappled with just how the Republican party married probusiness, antiworker, neoliberalism ideas with small-town social conservatism. One could even say that conservatives in Congress have to prioritize supporting their in-group, and their in-group is probusiness. Freemarket capitalism does seem to be a different beast from social conservatism. One of my conservative colleagues pointed me to enlightening essays about this in the American Conservative, a magazine I found to be far more reasonable than one would think from the constant vilification of conservatives on a website I enjoy, alovex.co

All of the above, the travel, the research, teaching, and the collaboration, has led me to a place where, instead of inching away when I meet someone who expresses conservative political values, I take the opportunity to learn. And not just because some conservatives join forces with liberals by being against patriarchy, racism, and my-country-first patriotism. There’s something else about conservatives that is interesting: they’re happier than liberals.

I have long appreciated the optimism about human progress that is a key ideal of liberalism (think of the term “progressive”). While I still embrace this view, I wonder if conservative ideals are more natural ideals. That is, does human nature, as it emerged under the pressures of natural selection of our small-group-living ancestors, include the urge to curtail individual expression, enforce authority, and hoard resources for the in-group? Compared to liberals, social conservatives may well be living lives that are more similar to what humans have lived for tens of thousands of years. And if so, is their more natural mind-set the reason that conservatives are, at least according to surveys, often happier than liberals?

Circle the answers you think best complete this sentence: If you are the houseguest of a friend-of-a-friend, your stay might be physically and socially more comfortable if your hosts are a) liberal b) conservative, but the conversation will be more intellectually stimulating if your hosts are a) liberal b) conservative.

If you answered b and a, then your intuitions are consistent with a growing literature on how personality and cognitive function match up with ideological beliefs. Conservatives are (on average) sociable, agreeable, and conscientious, as well as concerned about pleasing and fitting in with others of their group. When compared to conservatives, liberals are (on average), less socially astute and less attuned to the needs of others, less agreeable, and overall, less happy. On the intellectual side, liberals, compared to conservatives, prefer abstract, intellectual topics, as is consistent with their broader moral scope. Liberals are concerned with starvation in Africa, climate change, the threatened biosphere, factory farming, and issues that, important as they are, are far removed from the ordinary American’s day-to-day existence.

Social scientists have a long way to go to figure out the tangled causal relations holding among the observed correlations, but here’s a question: does big-picture, abstract thinking cause liberals to be less happy because they are removing themselves from the embodied here and now? After all, the ability to live in the moment and appreciate our lives as they exist does seem to be a key ingredient in day-to-day contentment. Or is it conservatives’ concern with lasting marriage, strong family cohesiveness, and day-to-day sociality that tips the scales toward greater daily contentment and happiness?

These ideas—from cross-cultural psychology to cognitive/personality styles—have been at the heart of my personal and intellectual journey during the last decade (when, perhaps not incidentally, I got married and gave birth to twin boys). It makes more sense to me now to incorporate into one’s tool kit all the strategies for a fulfilling life. When we understand more of the full set of ways to be human, we can be more human.

Catherine Caldwell-Harris is a College of Arts &#; Sciences associate professor of psychology and a research associate at the nonprofit Institute for the Bio-Cultural Study of Religion.

Источник: [alovex.co]

Men Are Now More Likely to Be Single Than Women. It's Not a Good Sign

Almost a third of adult single men live with a parent. Single men are much more likely to be unemployed, financially fragile and to lack a college degree than those with a partner. They&#;re also likely to have lower median earnings; single men earned less in than in , even adjusting for inflation. Single women, meanwhile, earn the same as they did 30 years ago, but those with partners have increased their earnings by 50%.

These are the some of the findings of a new Pew Research analysis of data on the growing gap between American adults who live with a partner and those who do not. While the study is less about the effect of marriage and more about the effect that changing economic circumstances have had on marriage, it sheds light on some unexpected outcomes of shifts in the labor market.

Over the same time period that the fortunes of single people have fallen, the study shows, the proportion of American adults who live with a significant other, be it spouse or unmarried partner, also declined substantially. In , about 71% of folks from the age of 25 to 54, which are considered the prime working years, had a partner they were married to or lived with. In , only 62% did.

Partly, this is because people are taking longer to establish that relationship. The median age of marriage is creeping up, and while now more people live together than before, that has not matched the numbers of people who are staying single. But it&#;s not just an age shift: the number of older single people is also much higher than it was in ; from a quarter of 40 to year-olds to almost a third by And among those 40 to year-olds, one in five men live with a parent.

Read More: A Woman of Color Cannot Save Your Workplace Culture

The trend has not had an equal impact across all sectors of society. The Pew study, which uses information from the American Community Survey, notes that men are now more likely to be single than women, which was not the case 30 years ago. Black people are much more likely to be single (59%) than any other race, and Black women (62%) are the most likely to be single of any sector. Asian people (29%) are the least likely to be single, followed by whites (33%) and Hispanics (38%).

Most researchers agree that the trendlines showing that fewer people are getting married and that those who do are increasingly better off financially have a lot more to do with the effect of wealth and education on marriage than vice versa. People who are financially stable are just much more likely to find and attract a partner.


More from TIME


&#;It&#;s not that marriage is making people be richer than it used to, it&#;s that marriage is becoming an increasingly elite institution, so that people are are increasingly only getting married if they already have economic advantages,&#; says Philip Cohen, a professor of sociology at the University of Maryland, College Park. &#;Marriage does not make people change their social class, it doesn&#;t make people change their race, and those things are very big predictors of economic outcomes.&#;

This reframing of the issue may explain why fewer men than women find partners, even though men are more likely to be looking for one. The economic pressures on men are stronger. Research has shown that an ability to provide financially is still a more prized asset in men than in women, although the trend is shifting. Some studies go so far as to suggest that the year decrease in the rate of coupling can be attributed largely to global trade and the year decrease in the number of stable and well-paying jobs for American men that it brought with it.

When manufacturing moved overseas, non-college educated men found it more difficult to make a living and thus more difficult to attract a partner and raise a family.

Read More: 42% of Women Say They Have Consistently Felt Burned Out at Work in

But there is also evidence that coupling up improves the economic fortunes of couples, both men and women. It&#;s not that they only have to pay one rent or buy one fridge, say some sociologists who study marriage, it&#;s that having a partner suggests having a future.

&#;There&#;s a way in which marriage makes men more responsible, and that makes them better workers,&#; says University of Virginia sociology professor W. Bradford Wilcox, pointing to a Harvard study that suggests single men are more likely than married men to leave a job before finding another. The Pew report points to a Duke University study that suggests that after marriage men work longer hours and earn more.

There&#;s also evidence that the decline in marriage is not just all about being wealthy enough to afford it. Since , women have graduated college in far higher numbers than men.

&#;The B.A. vs. non B.A. gap has grown tremendously on lots of things — in terms of income, in terms of marital status, in terms of cultural markers and tastes,&#; says Cohen. &#;It&#;s become a sharper demarcation over time and I think that&#;s part of what we see with regard to marriage. If you want to lock yourself in a room with somebody for 50 years, you might want to have the same level of education, and just have more in common with them.&#;

Read More: Price Hikes Will Likely Continue Through the End of , Fed Signals

Wilcox agrees: &#;You get women who are relatively liberal, having gone to college, and men who are relatively conservative, still living in a working class world, and that can create a kind of political and cultural divide that makes it harder for people to connect romantically as well.&#;

What seems to be clear is that the path to marriage increasingly runs through college. While the figures on single men&#;s declining economic fortunes are the most sobering, they are not what surprised the report&#;s authors the most. &#;It&#;s quite startling how much the partnered women have now outpaced single women,&#; says Richard Fry, a senior researcher at the Pew Research Center. &#;About 43% of partnered women have completed at least a bachelor&#;s degree compared to a third of single women.&#; He speculates that women may be going to college in greater numbers because it helps them attract a partner in the same way it helps men. &#;Not only are they rewarded in the labor market with higher earnings, but increasingly, partnership also depends on educational attainment.&#;

More Must-Read Stories From TIME

Contact us at letters@alovex.co

Источник: [alovex.co]

The white women who flipped: the price of changing your conservative views

“I love you,” Chera Sherman’s mother told her before driving away in her Jeep Cherokee, leaving her daughter, then 19, bawling fat tears in front of her boyfriend’s home in Laurel, Mississippi.

It was , and Sherman had made the life-altering mistake of falling in love with Jerry Breland, a lanky, black year-old she’d met through a friend back when she worked at Kmart.

Her mother had finally told her stepfather about their six-month relationship earlier that day after a local cop pulled Breland over while he was driving his girlfriend’s yellow Sunbird. When her stepfather heard she was violating his code against race-mixing, he drove to her job to tell her she had to move out.

“White men aren’t going to want you,” her father told her.

They allowed her to collect only what she could carry. The teenager couldn’t take her bedding or her jewelry – she even had to leave her car. “I love ya, but I just can’t have this,” her stepfather said as she grabbed random items.

In the car, the teen was hysterical the whole way; she was crazy about her boyfriend, but she didn’t want to be an orphan. She loved her family, too. “You made this decision,” her mother said, adding that she didn’t agree with her husband but had no control over it: he was the man of the house. And with that, she drove off.

Racism was the required way of life in Sherman’s mostly segregated community. When she was four, she had called a black man the N-word in public because that’s what she believed black people were called. The man was mortified, and her family members had laughed.

Inside, her boyfriend’s father told her she could sleep on the couch until the couple could get an apartment. They found one, but the owner kicked them out after a month when he realized Breland was black. They then landed a rental house where the landlord only cared about the color green.

Although she’d made good grades and planned to enroll at a community college that fall, higher education never happened for Sherman due to the obligations the couple took on to be together. He now works offshore on an oil rig; she takes care of their two boys.

‘Gaslighting is an art form perfected by conservatives’

Still happily married after 25 years, Sherman-Breland now believes many women pay the price – through abuse, rejection or public humiliation – for rejecting America’s rat’s nest of conservatism and racism that has exploded into full relief in Trump’s America.

“I can’t tell you the countless number of times younger Caucasian girls who are going through the same exact thing have reached out to me for advice,” she says now.

The south isn’t alone in its paternalism and sexism, but it is still a high art form here. “It is absolutely taught,” Sherman-Breland says. “You understand as a young girl that your place is behind your man, not in front or beside him. You cannot have your own opinions. That’s the most prevalent way they keep you in check.”

Sherman-Breland gradually went against her family’s broader conservative political beliefs as she became concerned about the future of her biracial sons, but it took hearing people she knew calling President Obama “the devil”, and Donald Trump’s open bigotry and birtherism, to electrify her. She now calls herself a proud liberal.

Most conservative wedge issues trace back to racism and sexism, she argues, adding that those poison beliefs take many shapes: abortion and immigration might make white people the minority; affirmative action gives the supposedly inferior an equal shot at jobs and education; public assistance benefits “freeloaders” of color.

White women continue to embrace such prevalent mores. “We’re helping you be a better woman. You’ll be stronger as a submissive Christian,” she says, mocking local white conservatives.

Sherman-Breland used to be anti-abortion herself, and while she doubts conservative men would actually overturn Roe v Wade – abortion is useful to them if they get the wrong women pregnant – she says they instead use it to get religious women to vote against their best interests. Abortion, she says, is what keeps many women she knows from quietly pulling a more progressive voting lever, especially after hearing Trump or Roy Moore next door in Alabama seem to justify sexual assault.

“Gaslighting is an art form perfected by conservatives in the south,” she says, wrinkling her nose.

The hypocrisy kills her. College wasn’t an option for her parents, either, who worked at garment factories. “We relied on social programs to eat,” she says, her smirk dripping with irony. “Not that they were lazy.”

No free pass for white women

White supremacy and all its destructive deep-seated beliefs are, like other forms of barbarism, usually ascribed to men. But historian Elizabeth Gillespie McRae warns that it is a mistake to give white women a pass while ignoring their role in America’s systemic racism.

“What’s wrong with white women?” – a common question after the election – is due to an amnesia, according to McRae, a history professor at Western Carolina University. McRae’s book, Mothers of Massive Resistance: White Women and the Politics of White Supremacy, illuminates powerful grassroots alliances of women across the country that worked to keep segregation alive in the 20th century.

“Segregation’s constant gardeners,” as McRae calls those women, distributed myth-filled textbooks and created student essay contests justifying white supremacy in public schools. They also enforced “racial integrity laws” used to kick someone who had “non-white” blood out of school, or have their marriage license refused.

Many of them were educated – some suffragists and newspaperwomen or even union advocates – and they purposefully helped create the twisted race politics that Sherman-Breland describes.

As the civil rights movement gained power, southern segregationists knew they were going to lose, McRae says, and they joined forces with conservatives nationally who coded their own racism. “Outside of the south, they needed to minimize overt racial language and instead talk about ‘constitutional government’,” McRae says. “Campaigning against social welfare and the safety net served their segregation purposes, too.”

Segregationist women used black-inferiority myths to bolster explosive anti-busing protests in Boston in the s, McRae adds. “It’s not to say that all conservatives are white supremacists, but that white supremacists and segregationist politics animated and shaped the new right,” McRae says. “Folks advocating various forms of segregation were all over the nation.”

And they still are. White women, she says, are still often the loudest voices in these battles to keep children of color and/or poverty from “tainting” schools.

‘I wasn’t taught real history’

Lynne Schneider, 49, grew up in Lawrence county, Mississippi. Schneider’s early views were shaped in the Southern Baptist church, but saying the N-word was frowned upon by then, and her working-class parents didn’t allow it.

But in her public school, which was about two-thirds white, black kids sat on their own side of the cafeteria, and white children like Schneider went to a “private” pool that didn’t allow African Americans.

Young Schneider believed her elders when they said everything was equal between races, or that the south fought the civil war for honorable reasons and not over slavery. “I wasn’t exactly an examining person. I wasn’t taught real history,” she says, adding that her textbooks were filled with romantic myths about the Old South.

That wasn’t by accident, historian McRae says. Starting in the early 20th century, a well-funded group of women descended from Confederate soldiers, were desperate to rewrite the reasons why their fathers and grandfathers fought in the civil war. Daughters of the Confederacy leadersworked diligently to ensure that textbooks pushed “happy slave” lies and pride in European colonialism. They even worked with new teachers’ unions to pass on revisionist books to black public schools.

As an adult, Schneider emulated women around her, voting Republican when she was She married a conservative man and became a teacher. By the time she came to Murrah high school in Jackson, Mississippi, in , the formerly all-white school was majority-black. Today at 95% black, it is, astonishingly, the whitest public school in the capital city.

There she met an English teacher, a white woman, who challenged her to think deeper on issues such as abortion and gay rights. Later, her black students helped change her “small government” conservative beliefs which, she realized, keep schools underfunded and subject to constant attacks.

The students also pushed back when she messed up.

One day, Schneider told a class to “stop acting like BeBe kids,” a term used in the black community to reference misbehaving kids.

“You’re calling us ratchet ghetto kids,” they charged.

Schneider apologized for hurting them. “I still make mistakes,” she told them.

To “step out of the ignorance and blinders” of her upbringing, Schneider attended race dialogues and trainings such as Teaching for Change, but she warns other whites not to get high-and-mighty. “When a white person decides they’re so ‘woke’, they can be a little too quick to know more about black people than black people. No matter how clued in you are, you’re still white,” she warns.

She knows plenty of white women who are scared to reject their conservative upbringing, even if their beliefs have morphed, too. “They don’t want to fall out of favor, not be accepted,” she says. “Mississippi is like a football game. People want to be on the winning team. If you’re not conservative here, you have to get used to your side losing.”

‘I had $, a suitcase and a child’

Anna McNeill’s first husband punched her in the hip one day, leaving a bruise the size of a grapefruit. He told her later she must have run into a piece of furniture.

He soon made it clear she had to mirror his beliefs. That included voting the same. Both were religious conservatives – he had attended seminary – so the compliance did not immediately seem onerous. But she soon learned what complete control felt like.

“As long as he didn’t cheat on me, beat me or spend all of our money on gambling or whatever, he said I should count myself lucky,” McNeill, now 39, says. He told her he was the only one who would put up with her, and quoted the Bible to ensure that she was fully submissive to him and isolated from friends and family.

“The gaslighting was the main thing, right?” she says. “I doubted myself.”

She finally left him. “I had $, a suitcase and a child. I didn’t have resources.”

Therapy helped her question the family-values party line she and her husband followed. “I was conservative but starting to feel pretty disenfranchised by the Republican party,” she says.

McNeill soon remarried and had two more children with a second husband. He was ultra-conservative and his views on race disturbed her. “If I contested, I worried he would make my children suffer. Depression will suck all the fight out of you.”

She eventually left him, too. Now, she is happily alone with her children and involved in causes she believes in, trying to do domestic-violence advocacy work full time. “My interest in criminal justice reform came about because of my interest in domestic violence,” she says. “I started realizing a lot of these people that were incarcerated came from traumatic backgrounds.”

Still deeply religious, McNeill believes in “limited government” and says Trump proves how dangerous too much power can be in a bad leader’s hands. “I tend now to lean more toward libertarian, which is big enough for both liberals and conservatives,” she says, adding that the government should stay out of all marriage decisions, including same-sex.

McNeil is still anti-abortion. She says probably nine out of 10 white women she knows who voted for Trump in backed him only because of his stance on abortion, looking past his distasteful traits because the issue is “ a human rights issue” to them. “If you believe that is a person, then you have to protect that person,” she says.

Do anti-choice voters believe Trump really cares about abortion? “Oh, no,” McNeill says, laughing. “They thought he was more likely to appoint judges who would address that issue. Almost every single person says, ‘I will hold my nose. He’s in there four to eight years, but those judges are for life’.”

The fear of communism and socialism

In the late s, Jan Levy Mattiace’s half-Jewish father and Methodist mother pulled her out of public school and enrolled her in a new segregation academy. Although her father was more progressive than most, many white parents then rejected public schools due to the red scare, during which white leaders, segregation academies and the Ku Klux Klan drummed up fear of the supposedly putrid mix of civil rights and communism.

“As children, we did not realize what was going on,” Mattiace says now, adding that she’s happy to see racial diversity in her alma mater today. The most recent US Department of Education numbers show Mississippi’s Canton Academy was 85% white, 12% black, 2% Hispanic and 1% Asian as of the school year. The town of Canton is 71% black.

In the s, Mattiace became the political director of the Mississippi Republican party before, she says, the extreme-right took over the GOP. She recruited more black members even as national strategists like Lee Atwaterhelped perfect the bigoted “southern strategy” to draw racist voters from a shifting Democratic party to the GOP.

Today, at age 55, Mattiace is on the board of Dialogue Jackson, which hosts race conversations across political divides. She voted for the black Democrat Mike Espy against Cindy Hyde-Smith for Senate last November and now calls herself a “centrist” who may vote for a Democrat for governor this year.

“I land between Colin Powell and George Herbert Walker Bush,” she says. But, she adds, “I am not a feminist.” She is for equal rights, respect and opportunity for women, however, and is now married to a commercial developer who decidedly does not tell her how to vote.

Polarization between the left and right have long worried her, but Donald Trump concerns her more. Many of her friends may vote for him a second time in But for them it’s not about abortion, or following their husbands’ orders. “It was a vote against Hillary. Or against the Democratic agenda. They feel like that’s a danger,” Mattiace says. They find Trump better than the communist horrors many learned about at home and school.

“There’s a fear of moving into a socialist society,” Mattiace says. “They’re people that may have relatives in socialist countries … that are grasping for groceries and have to take a number to buy food. Trying to redistribute wealth fairly like that, it becomes chaotic, a war zone.”

Can people truly change?

People can change, as Sherman-Breland and her husband have learned. They stayed in the same county, marrying a decade after her mother dumped her in front of Breland’s house that day.

Over time, Sherman’s family fell in love with their grandchildren and with Breland – even her stepfather. “When he died in , he was probably closer to Jerry than anyone else in his life,” she says of her stepdad.

Her husband never got nor expected an apology, however.

Sherman-Breland is concerned about Trump dragging old-school racism out of the hall closet. He is making people backslide into open hatefulness, dividing families like hers around the country, she says.

She worries especially about what Trumpism is doing to her own family’s loving detente. “When my family started supporting Trump and the ideals of all his rhetoric, it was literally like reliving all of that hurt again,” she says.

“I know they love us. But their support of this rise in white supremacy is devastating all over again. It has ripped my family apart. Again.”

Источник: [alovex.co]
November 11,

In her book American Hookup, Lisa Wade says, based on what some students of color told her, that “in some ways, hookup culture is a white thing.” In this blog post, we use data from an online survey from over 20, American students at 21 colleges and universities to explore what, if any, differences in sexual behavior or attitudes about sex exist between White, Black, Latinx, South Asian, and East Asian students.

What We Did

We used data from the Online College Social Life Survey (OCSLS), collected by Paula England between and , to compare White, Black, Latinx, East Asian, and South Asian students. (We call these racial groups for brevity, realizing that Latinx is sometimes considered an ethnicity rather than a race.) We examined racial differences separately for men and women and compared groups on attitudes and behaviors. The percents, means, or medians in the graphs below are regression-adjusted to remove any part of racial differences that stems from group differences in age, immigrant status, mother’s education, whether their parents are still together, school, height, and body mass index (BMI). For more details on our models, see the Technical Appendix at the end of this post.

Some Attitudes Show Almost No Racial Differences

On some values and aspirations, racial groups seem remarkably alike. As the two graphs below show, between 90% and 93% of those in every race/gender group of both men and women say they want to marry, and between 89% and 96% of every group want children.

Racial groups also differ little in their ideas of the best age to do these things, with the average age seen as ideal for marriage between 25 and 28 for all groups and the average ideal age for having a first child between 27 and Also, racial groups have in common that, in each group, compared to women, men see a slightly higher age as appropriate for themselves to take on these roles.

One attitude about hooking up also shows virtually no racial differences: in all groups, approximately 70%% of men and women say they would be less interested in a relationship with a person who hooks up a lot, as this graph shows.

Racial Group Differences in Attitudes About Sex

Some attitudes show significant differences by race. One question asked students how much they agree with this statement: “I would not have sex with someone unless I was in love with them.” In every racial group, more women than men agree. Focusing on racial differences, Whites and Blacks are similar in their response, and these two groups are most positive about sex without love, as the graph below shows. Latinx students are more conservative. Asian students are the most conservative in their belief that sex requires love. As the graph shows, among women, white and black women are equally liberal, with only 49% agreeing that sex requires love. A larger 59% of Latinas, 64% of East Asian women, and 76% of South Asian women agree.

Those who believe sex requires love presumably disapprove of casual sex but might think that sex among students in relationships is okay. A more conservative standard is disapproving of any sex before marriage, even in a serious relationship. The graph below shows that South Asians are the most conservative in believing that premarital sex is wrong, while Whites are the most liberal, with Latinx students very close to Whites. Unlike beliefs about whether love is necessary for sex, where Whites and Blacks were very close to each other, these beliefs about whether premarital sex is wrong show Black students to be substantially more conservative than Whites and Latinx students. On the issue of premarital sex, Blacks are closer to the conservative views of Asians, who are the most conservative.

Racial Group Differences in Sexual Behavior

Now we move to behavior, starting with the simplest measure—the percent of students who are still virgins. In our sample, in which the average student was in their second year of college, South Asians have the highest proportion of virgins: 66% of women and 50% of men had never had intercourse. The group with the next highest rate is East Asians. Whites, Blacks, and Latinx students all have lower rates of between 21% and 34% virgins.

Next, we look at the number of hookups since the start of college each group reported. We use the median (the number that the man or woman at the 50thpercentile had) rather than the mean (the average) because the median is less influenced by the few students who reported extremely high numbers of hookups. Among men, Asians have the lowest number of hookups, with a median of one hook up, Latinx men are next with a little above two, and Whites and Blacks are the highest with almost identical medians at approximately three hookups. Among women, we Black and East or South Asian women have hooked up little, Latinx women are in the middle, White women have hooked up the most. While this shows that hooking up is most prevalent among whites, it also shows that it is certainly not only a “white thing.” Indeed, among men, as we saw it is done about the same amount by Black and White men.

Of course, knowing the rate at which students are hooking up does not tell us how much they have casual intercourse, because not all hookups involve intercourse.  As students define the term “hookup,” a hookup may involve little or even nothing more than making out, and these data show that about 40% of hookups involve intercourse. To get at whether students had had casual intercourse, the survey asked if they had ever had sex outside of an exclusive relationship. The question didn’t clarify what was meant by “sex.” However, there is lots of qualitative evidence that heterosexual students usually take the term to mean intercourse, whereas a majority of what they call hookups do not involve intercourse.

As the next graph shows, Asians are the least likely to have had sex outside an exclusive relationship.  This is partly a reflection of the fact that many haven’t had intercourse at all, as we saw above. Black, White, and Latinx students have had more casual intercourse, and within-sex, race differences are fairly small in these three groups.  In every group other than East Asians, men are more likely to report sex outside a relationship than women.

Another behavioral indicator is the number of partners with whom one has ever had intercourse. In this analysis, virgins count as having zero partners, and we limited the count to the number of partners of the other sex, ignoring any same-sex partners. We examine medians rather than averages because there are some extreme outliers with many partners, which affect means more than medians. The graph below shows that among both women and men, Asians have had the least number of partners. Among women, there is little difference between Whites, Blacks, and Latinas, all of whom have had between and 2 partners. Among men, however, Blacks have substantially more than other men, with a median slightly more than 4, compared to between 2 and for Whites and Latinx men, and less for Asian men.

Explaining Racial Differences and Race-Gender Intersections

We have shown that racial groups are virtually identical on whether and when they want to marry and have alovex.cor, there are some group differences in attitudes about students having sex, and in their sexual behavior.

Where we see differences, Asians, especially South Asians, appear the most conservative in attitudes and behavior, Latinx students are in the middle, and either Whites or Blacks are generally the most permissive, depending on the issue. In this blog post, we can’t fully answer the complicated questions of what causes these differences, but we offer some ideas, with some data to back them up.

Over 95% of both the East Asian and South Asian students in our study are either first- or second-generation immigrants – that is, either they were themselves born outside the U.S., or one or both of their parents were. We speculate that the relatively conservative attitudes and less active sexual behavior of Asians result from the influence of their immigrant parents from Asia. Fewer, but a still high 82%, of the Latinx students in our study are first- or second-generation immigrants, so this explanation may apply somewhat to them as well. By contrast, only 16% of Whites and 35% of Black students in the study are immigrants or had an immigrant parent. (See the technical appendix for more details on this.)

As for differences between Blacks and other racial groups, the patterns differ strongly by gender. As many race and gender scholars have argued, an intersectional approach is often needed when the way race affects men and women is very different. Let us start with men. Black men have had more sexual partners than White or other men. What explains this?  Prior research has shown that youth of any race who grow up in poverty or with less educated parents are more likely to have first intercourse earlier and Blacks are especially likely to grow up disadvantaged. Consistent with this, past research on the age of sexual debut among US adolescents, has shown that Black youth have an earlier age at first intercourse than Whites, which is likely to lead to more sexual experience by the age of most of the college respondents. (The survey question asks about number of partners ever, not only during college, so having started during or before high school could lead to a higher lifetime number.)

The difference between White and Black men’s median partners is —with Black men having a median of and White men partners. To test how much of this is explained by Black men having had an earlier age at first intercourse, we re-estimated the regression analysis controlling for this factor and created adjusted medians assigning the age at first intercourse for the sample as a whole to all races of men. The new adjusted median number of partners is only .7 apart rather than apart, implying that about two-thirds of the gap is explained by differences in age at first intercourse. Thus, the White-Black differences among men may reflect less about different behavior at college and more about the early effects of disadvantage leading to early first sex.

However, if the explanation we offered for Black men were just about socioeconomic disadvantage, we would expect to find it applicable to Black women too. Instead, we found that Black women students are significantly more likely to be virgins than White women, they have had about the same number of intercourse partners as White women, and they have had substantially fewer hookups than either White women or Latinas. Moreover, they are more likely to think premarital sex is wrong than any race-gender group other than South Asian women. Why are Black women more conservative than other racial groups on many indicators, while Black men are more liberal? We suggest two possible explanations. It may be in part because Black women are aware of stereotypes of Blacks as hypersexual, and, given the gendered double standard that shames women more than men for casual sex, black women may feel the responsibility to behave in a way that doesn’t reinforce racial stereotypes usually seen as pejorative. A second possible explanation for the fact that Black women are more likely to be virgins and have fewer hookups is that Black women may be less sought after as partners than women of other races, a race-gender-specific bias in the erotic hierarchy.

 

Technical Appendix: Data, Measures, and Statistical Procedures

Data

We used data from the Online College Social Life Survey (OCSLS). The OCSLS surveyed over 20, students from 21 four-year colleges and universities between and The colleges and universities where the survey was administered were both private and public.

A limitation of the OCSLS survey is that participants surveyed did not come from a probability sample. However, because the instructors in the courses hosting the survey gave students extra credit, participation in these classes was nearly %. Thus, any non-representativeness of the sample is likely caused by the schools chosen and the kinds of students in the hosting courses, not who decided to participate within classes. Also helpful to the representativeness of the sample is the fact that, although the hosting classes were mostly sociology, only approximately 10% of respondents were sociology majors.

Students were asked their race or ethnicity, which we used to divide them into White, Black, Latinx, East Asian, or South Asian. (Students in other groups, such as Native American, were not used because other groups were too small for reliable analyses.)

The outcome measures used are questions about sexual behavior and attitudes.

Attitudes

We used the following questions (see bullets below) to tap attitudes and values regarding sex.

  • If a man and a woman have sexual relations before marriage, do you think it is wrong?

For this question, we divided students into two groups—those who chose “not wrong at all,” the most permissive answer, and those who took the more restrictive view that premarital sex is ‘always,’ ‘almost always,’ or ‘sometimes’ wrong.

  • If someone has hooked up a lot, I&#;m less interested in this person as a potential girl/boyfriend.
  • I would not have sex with someone unless I was in love with them.

For the two questions above, response categories were; strongly agree, agree, disagree, or strongly disagree. We divided the responses into a more permissive group who disagreed or strongly disagreed and a more restrictive group who agreed or strongly agreed.

  • Do you want to get married in the future? 

Respondents answered yes, no, don’t know, or already married. We deleted those already married then dichotomized into those who said yes, versus those who said no or don’t know.

  • Do you want to have children (or more children) in the future?

Respondents answered yes or no.

  • How old would you ideally like to be when you get married?
  • How old would you ideally like to be when you have children (or more children)?

Respondents who wanted to get married or have children gave an exact age for the two questions above.

Behavior 

Regarding sexual behavior and hooking up, students were asked:

  • How many people have you had intercourse with?
  • Have you ever had intercourse outside of an exclusive relationship?

Responses were yes and no.

  • Since you started college, how many people have you hooked up with in the case where you were not already in a romantic relationship with the person but you did know him or her?
  • Since you started college, how many people have you hooked up with whom you didn&#;t know before that night?

The numbers students gave for the two kinds of hookups above were added together to get their total number of hookups.

Models

The graphs above show regression-adjusted averages, medians, or percents. That is, these percents or numbers are predicted values from a regression predicting the attitude or behavior from: age (entered linearly), immigration status (categorized into whether the student was a first-generation immigrant, had at least one parent who was an immigrant, or was not an immigrant and did not have a parent who was), respondent’s mother’s education (high school only, less than high school, some college, bachelor’s degree, graduate degree), whether respondent’s parents are still together, indicators for school attended, height, and body mass index (BMI).

Using the regression equations, for each outcome we predicted a mean, median, or percent for each racial group, using an average marginal effects approach, such that each racial group was assigned the whole sample distribution of all control variables, thus giving each group the same distribution on these controls, and thus “controlling for” these factors. In the case of predicted averages and percents, the regression was an OLS regression. Where the variable was a dichotomy, this OLS is a linear probability model. In the case of medians, we used a conditional quantile regression. Separate regressions were done for men and women. Interestingly, racial group differences were very similar to those found in simple descriptive statistics on each group calculated with no regression adjustment.

In the post, we suggest that having immigrant parents from nations with somewhat more conservative sexual norms may explain the more conservative beliefs and behavior of South and East Asian students, and, to a lesser extent of Latinx students. The attentive reader may wonder why we say this when our model includes immigration status as a control variable, implying that the differences we find “hold immigration status constant.” Our model accomplishes this only if we assume that the effect of immigration status is constant across groups (technically, that there is no interaction between race and immigration status). However, our earlier posts Do Immigrants Have More Conservative Sexual Attitudes Than Other College Students? and What Does Studying College Sex Tell Us About Immigrant Assimilation? showed that this is not true.

Among whites, immigrant status has little effect on sexual attitudes or behavior, perhaps because white immigrants are mostly Canadians, Europeans, and Australians, and the sexual norms in these countries are not so different than those in the United States. Since Whites are the most numerous in the sample, the effects of immigration status that are used in the regression adjustment in this post, which are for the sample as a whole, are dominated by the small effects for whites. Thus, the model does not adequately adjust for the effect of having immigrant parents on Asian and Latinx students, leaving open the possibility that this may be the explanation for their more conservative sexual behavior.

In one supplementary model discussed above, to explore how much of the Black/White difference among men in number of intercourse partners is explained by an earlier age at first intercourse, we run an additional quantile regression for men predicting number of partners from all the variables in all the regressions discussed above, plus age at first vaginal intercourse (represented with indicator variables for “14 or younger,” “15 to 19,” and “20 or older,” which included virgins). We then used the regression results to predict number of partners separately for Black and White men assuming they each had the sample-wide distribution on age at first intercourse. (We also assumed they had the sample-wide mean on other variables, but that adjustment was already reflected in the graphs shown.)

Data Access

Researchers who wish to use the OCSLS data can contact Emma Mishel at ekm@alovex.co for information on how to download the data.

*Note: Numbers shown are means except when indicated that they are medians. In the case of dichotomized variables, the means (X) are the percent in the category indicated by the variable name.

*Note: Numbers shown are means except when indicated that they are medians. In the case of dichotomized variables, the means (X) are the percent in the category indicated by the variable name.


Emma Patton is an undergraduate Sociology major, Paula England is Silver Professor of Sociology, and Andrew Levine is a doctoral student in Sociology. All are at New York University.

Источник: [alovex.co]

“For conservatives, by conservatives”: the rise of right-wing dating apps

If you’re a young Republican looking for love, there are plenty of swipe-based options at your disposal. There’s Tinder, of course, and a spate of other apps like Bumble, Hinge, and OkCupid, as well as members-only platforms like Raya and the League. But some right-leaning folks say they’ve struck out on these platforms because would-be matches don’t agree with their politics — “Trump supporters swipe left” is a common refrain.

In recent years, a crop of conservative dating startups have launched in response to this phenomenon, all with one purpose: giving right-wingers a safe space to find love. Some, like Righter and Conservatives Only, are only for, well, conservatives. Others, like Donald Daters — tagline: Make America Date Again — claim they’re open to people of all political stripes who are interested in dating Republicans.

It makes sense to structure dating apps around common values, which are perhaps becoming more clear in the Trump era; for example, Bumble recently introduced a “filtering” feature that lets people weed out matches who don’t meet their political, astrological, or lifestyle preferences. But some of the people behind these conservative apps think liberals who refuse to date conservatives are doing something more destructive than looking for partners who share their values. To them, it amounts to anti-conservative discrimination.

The rise of right-wing dating apps

Emily Moreno, the founder of Donald Daters, told me she once had a date walk out on her “before the drinks had even arrived” after she said she had worked on a Republican Senate campaign — and that was before Trump got elected.

“I continue to hear these stories from my friends about how when they’re on these standard dating apps, they’re always told they won’t get a first date. It’s right there in the bio,” she said, referring to the seemingly ubiquitous “Trump supporters swipe left.”

“The people that do get a first date either don’t get a second date or they have to self-censor,” she continued. “I think it’s very telling about where we are right now, and it’s sad that politics has become entrenched in our dating lives.”

Moreno isn’t the first person to say she’s had a date go sour after she mentioned being a Republican. Earlier this year, Politico magazine documented the dating trials of millennial Trump staffers, many of whom claimed that supporting the president makes them outcasts — even in Washington, DC.

A survey by OkCupid found that 74 percent of its users considered voting for Trump a deal breaker. That same year, a writer for the Federalist claimed that liberals’ “refusal to date conservatives is one reason we have Donald Trump,” which feels like a difficult thesis to prove.

For Moreno, this all amounts to anti-conservative discrimination, which she said has intensified under Trump. “There has been a much more vocal and robust — and at times, threatening — attack against people who support our president” than under past administrations, she said.

(In , a black man who had volunteered on Barack Obama’s campaign was verbally harassed and physically assaulted for wearing an Obama shirt in Louisiana. Soon after Obama’s election, right-wing protesters across the country burned effigies of the first black president. Moreno said that any form of “damnation” against a president is “terrible,” but maintained that discrimination against Trump supporters is “unique” and unprecedented.)

Peter Hatemi, a political science professor at Pennsylvania State University, agreed with Moreno’s premise that people are increasingly averse to dating someone who doesn’t share their political views, and that this is partially because of a rise in polarization. But, he explained, that doesn’t quite amount to discrimination. “It’s self-selection. It’s based on really strong data that like seeks out like,” he explained. “But there’s no discrimination against conservatives [on mainstream dating apps]. There’s absolutely no structural discrimination that prevents conservatives from dating.”

“Rather than feeling sorry for my friends, I decided to go out and do something about it,” Moreno said. And thus, Donald Daters was born. The app launched in October and immediately made headlines, not for its premise but for exposing user information — including names, profile pictures, and, in some cases, private messages — in an open database. Moreno assured me the security problems have since been fixed, adding that she suspected the app had been hacked by “liberal aggressors.”

Users get 25 free swipes each day and have to pay for subsequent credits, which can be used to send messages and get more swipes. There are three subscription tiers: $ per month for a year, $ per month for six months, and $ for a single month. Moreno declined to tell me how many users the app currently has — “I don’t have the exact number on me” — but said that the app was downloaded more than 20, times in the first few weeks after launch.

Platforms like Donald Daters make sense in coastal cities like New York and Los Angeles, where a majority of voters lean blue and where, as a result, conservatives may feel alienated. But when I downloaded the app to see if there were any right-leaning singles in my area, I found that most of the people who showed up in the “activity feed” lived hundreds of miles away.

It’s possible that Donald Daters’ potential user base has instead flocked to one of the other right-wing dating apps, of which there are several. Conservatives Only, one of the more established platforms, launched during the Obama administration. Then came TrumpSingles, which was released just a few months before the presidential election and which, according to founder David Goss, gained more than 52, members after Trump was inaugurated. Patrio, a platform for “conservative, patriotic singles,” has been around since And Righter, the newest of the bunch, was released in December.

Righter takes a different approach than Donald Daters, which Moreno told me is open to people of all political affiliations — even liberals. Righter is “for us, by us,” founder Christy Edwards Lawton told me. “Us,” of course, means conservatives.

More than ever, people want to find partners who share their values — including political affiliation

Lawton said she got the idea for Righter after meeting a “beautiful” woman at a Republican fundraiser in Manhattan whose politics interfered with her dating life.

“She flat-out told me she absolutely couldn’t get a date that was not [trying] to use her as arm candy or bed her,” Lawton said. “No one was interested in her personal politics. It wasn’t that she couldn’t get a date — she’s gorgeous. Of course men wanted her, but not men that shared her values.”

Before launching Righter, Lawton said, she and her team looked through Tinder profiles all over the country — “from the Rocky Mountain region to the West Coast all the way to the East Coast” — and saw the same thing in bios everywhere: “Trump voters swipe left.”

“After Trump was elected, it was interesting to see that the environment was so toxic,” Lawton, who previously worked as a matchmaker, told me. “I didn’t realize that was going to matriculate into the dating world.”

To some, the fact that members of the #resistance don’t want to date Trump supporters is indicative of the unprecedented, and possibly even dangerous, political polarization of the current political era. Pew’s political polarization survey found that 30 percent of conservatives said they’d be unhappy if a family member married a Democrat, and 23 percent of Democrats said they’d disapprove if a relative married a Republican.

Stephanie Coontz, a professor of history and family studies at Evergreen State College, told me this is a relatively recent development. “Back in the ’50s and ’60s, having different political party ideas was not a deal breaker at all in relationships,” she said. Coontz partially attributed this phenomenon to an increase in political polarization, but also explained how the concept of what a relationship should be — and what a potential partner should bring to the table — has changed over time.

“I think it’s always been the ideal to have somebody who shares your values. In colonial days, when marriage was the most important financial and work decision you would make in your life, those values tended to revolve around that. ‘Is this person a good worker? Will this person bring a good dowry?’” she said.

“Until the s and even into the ’60s, the model of marriage was one of specialization. Women took care of not just the home, but also moral issues and religious issues.” The men, meanwhile, were the providers. Coontz told me that many of the people she interviewed for her book Strange Stirring, which examines the way marriage and relationships changed in the ’60s, told her they were “basically marrying a gender stereotype.”

“Several guys told me, ‘Well, I never talked politics with my wife. That was something I talked about with other guys because she didn’t understand what I was talking about, but she was such a good mom,’” Coontz said. “And then you’d have women who told me, ‘My husband doesn’t get me as a person, but he’s such a good father and such a good provider.’”

But then things changed. In the ’60s and ’70s, Coontz said, women began to gain the political, economic, and cultural capital to marry for love instead of — or in addition to — financial security. “Now we want an equal and passionate friendship, which means that we share skills, we no longer specialize, we both share the housework, the child rearing, the breadwinning; we share values and we share our leisure time,” she told me. Given all of this, it makes perfect sense that modern daters want to find partners whose political opinions align with their own.

On Patrio, another conservative dating app, users are encouraged to list not only their hobbies but also their political views and issues they care about, all of which are displayed as “badges” on their profile. This customizability is limited — users can only choose two hobbies and three causes from a pre-selected list (options include “MAGA,” “free market,” and “build the wall”). The only viable political views are “conservative,” “classical liberal,” “center right,” “libertarian,” and “other.”

Josh, a year-old from New York who asked to be referred to by his first name, signed up for Patrio to find potential dates with similar interests and values. “There are certain issues that are very important to me, and I am able to add most of them to my profile,” he told me in an email. (Those issues, he said, include “blue lives matter, free speech, free markets, pro Israel, and Pro flag/anthem.”)

But he didn’t join Patrio because he felt discriminated against on Tinder or Bumble. “While I have encountered a few women who have put in their bios that if you are right leaning or if you support the president you will be blocked/unmatched, I haven’t seen enough to make it a material issue,” he said.

Scott, a Patrio user who asked to be referred to by a pseudonym, similarly said that not getting matches on more mainstream apps doesn’t amount to discrimination. “It’s not discrimination if the people just don’t like you,” he said, adding that he’d be open to dating non-conservative women. “I’m open to dating anyone as long as they are a rational human being. Helps if they’re cute, too.”

Righter, meanwhile, is built on the premise that conservatives should only date conservatives. “Being conservative is a core value; it’s a lifestyle choice,” Lawton told me. For her, conservatism is about more than politics — it’s a way of life. This mentality is clear on Righter, where men are encouraged to make the first move and pay for the first date.

“Men want to be men,” Lawton told me. “Men are so happy that they’ve found an app where the women will be women and the men get to be men. I’m not kidding you. I’m quoting the men.”

It makes sense that people want to find dates who share their values, whether that means voting for a certain political party or refusing to deviate from strict gender roles. Lawton was quick to point out that when it comes to dating, personal preferences don’t amount to discrimination. “I think people should date who they want to date. If you want to date a blonde, date a blonde. If you want to date a skinny person, date a skinny person. I don’t think that’s discrimination.”

Does Lawton expect conservatives to date liberals? No. Does she think liberals should be open to going on dates with conservatives, even if those dates don’t result in a “love match?” Yes.

“They’re the ones telling us how racist we are, and how shortsighted we are, and it’s like, really? I just feel like it’s very rude,” she told me.

That said, liberals aren’t welcome on her app. “This app is for conservatives by conservatives,” she said. Her message to anyone left of center is clear: “Get on a different app. Righter is not the app for you.”

Lawton understands why conservatives would want to date someone who shares their values — but she doesn’t seem to comprehend why liberals would want to do the same.

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Источник: [alovex.co]

When Asians say they’re not into Asian men

“I’m not into Asian men.” I can attribute this quote to several friends and acquaintances, and the funny thing is, many of them were Asian. 

Which begs the question: why? I sometimes ask that aloud. Usually the response would be a non-answer: silence, a topic change or “I don’t know, I’m just not into them.” 

I’m not saying that Asians alone are guilty of rejecting Asian men. If anything, we’re likelier than other groups to give them a chance. Nor should we feel obligated to constrain our options to Asian men. But too often, Asians are as guilty as anyone in refusing to see Asian men as sexual partners. And they don’t question why. 

Maybe it’s unfair of me to assume what you mean when you say you’re not into Asian men. But having been fed stereotypes about Asian men time after time, it’s not hard to put two and two together. What might just seem like a harmless non-preference for people of your own race may really just be the result of internalized self-racism. 

Apparently as Asians, we are, as a collective, small, meek and effeminate. This means that we Asian women — as an Uber driver told me once — conservative woman dating asian man “real ladies,” with tight fits, small, conservative woman dating asian man, pliable bodies and no opinions. 

The men, meanwhile, aren’t manly enough. They’re supposedly not “well endowed,” and as Asians, they’ve been raised to be quiet and submissive. Useful qualities for women, conservative woman dating asian man, hence our charm! But not so for men. 

Perhaps you buy into other myths about Asians. That we’re racist and homophobic. That we’re book-smart but out of touch with politics. That we aren’t creative or good conversationalists. Those are all unattractive qualities. But just as these stereotypes do not define you, they do not define the men who look like you. 

You might already know that these stereotypes are nonsense. You might protest that you’re not into Asian men not because you’re racist. How can you be, anyway, when you yourself are Asian? It’s just a natural preference, you like “manly men,” you can’t help it, and besides, you have Asian male friends. You’re just not interested in having sex with them. 

It’s worth it, however, to take a moment to examine this “natural” preference for non-Asian men. To acknowledge that somewhere deep down, you may have internalized these stereotypes and that rejecting men because of their ethnicity, because they’re Asian, is racism. To also examine the sociocultural factors you grew up with and know that it’s not entirely your fault. 

Growing up, most of the media I consumed was in English, so most of the romantic male leads I was familiar with were white men in white movies. My asian men online dating with Asian males (or males really) was mostly limited to relatives and immature pubescent boys in my predominantly Korean school. So the white fictional characters that I fell in love with were my models for how I felt male partners should be. 

When there were Asian male characters in Western media, they were typically a source of comic relief — sometimes offensive — or some sort of professional (like a doctor) who was more or less an expositional prop. They were at best likable, at worst stereotypical. They were rarely romantic, rarely sexy. 

It’s true that, American media aside, the world is becoming more interested in Asian entertainment. But even representation within Asian media leaves something to be desired. In Korea, there are lesbian dating videos so many different kinds of bodies entertainment industries favor, and lately, they like their men slim and androgynous, conservative woman dating asian man. That may feed into the myth that Asian men are inherently small and effeminate. Maybe that sort of physicality doesn’t appeal to you. But remember that these men are only a sliver of the Asian male population. 

You might also want to ask yourselves: If you’re not interested perks of dating an asian Asian men, who are you interested in? White men? That’s part conservative woman dating asian man why white men are so obsessed with Asian women, after all — apparently with them, we’re easy. And all too often, for Asian women with conservative families, they’re the only other racial group conservative woman dating asian man we can get away with marrying. 

The ugly truth is, some of our friends and family see having white friends as some sort of social advancement. Oh, you have white friends in college? You’re so cultured. You’re dating a white man? Wow [Average Joe] is so handsome, you’re so lucky, I want one too. 

Maybe you’re turned off by the conservative woman dating asian man of marrying into a family that takes traditions you’re no longer in touch with seriously. Maybe you grew up a dating site a predominantly white neighborhood and like what’s familiar. 

Or maybe you’re making a conscious, well-meaning decision to reject the toxic obsession with so-called blood purity that pervades some of our cultures. Maybe you’re not into Conservative woman dating asian man men but you actually don’t like putting white men on a pedestal either. You go for other minorities and pride yourself in being “rebellious” and “open-minded.” 

But maybe it’s time for you to look at people as individuals. Maybe people are more than ethnicities or cultures to reject or try. 

Maybe, when you say “I’m not into Asian men,” you’re reinforcing harmful myths about men who look like you. Maybe you’re even reinforcing myths about yourself. Maybe it’s time you realize: Asian men can be as sexy as other men. And once you’ve realized that, remind yourself that you, as conservative woman dating asian man Asian, can be sexy too. 

Sarah Y. Kim is a junior double-majoring in Writing Seminars and International Studies from Walnut Creek, Calif. She is the Opinions Editor.

Tags: opinion, trending

Источник: [alovex.co]

Men Are Now More Likely to Be Single Than Women. It's Not a Good Sign

Almost a third of adult single men live with a parent. Single men are much more likely to be unemployed, financially fragile and to lack a college degree than those with a partner. They&#;re also likely to have lower median earnings; single men earned less in than ineven adjusting for inflation. Single women, meanwhile, earn the same as they did 30 years ago, but those with partners have increased their earnings by 50%.

These are the some of the findings of a new Pew Research analysis of data on the growing gap between American adults who live with a partner and those who do not. While the study is less about the effect of marriage and more about the effect that changing economic circumstances have had on marriage, it sheds light on some unexpected outcomes of shifts in the labor market.

Over the same time period that the fortunes of single people have fallen, the study shows, the proportion of American adults who live with a significant other, be it spouse or unmarried partner, also declined substantially. Inabout 71% of folks from the age of 25 to 54, which are considered the prime working years, conservative woman dating asian man, had a partner they were married to or lived with. Inonly 62% did.

Partly, this is because conservative woman dating asian man are taking longer to establish that relationship. The median age of marriage is creeping up, and while now more people live together than before, that has not matched the numbers of people who are staying single. But it&#;s not just an age shift: the number of older single people is also much higher than it was in ; from a quarter of 40 to year-olds to almost a third by And among those 40 to year-olds, one in five men live with a parent.

Read More: A Woman of Color Cannot Save Your Workplace Culture

The trend has not had an equal impact across all sectors of society. The Pew study, which uses information from the American Community Survey, conservative woman dating asian man, notes that men are now more likely to be single than women, which was not the case 30 years ago. Black people are much more likely to be single (59%) than any other race, and Black women (62%) are the most likely to be single of any sector. Asian people (29%) are the least likely to be single, followed by whites (33%) and Hispanics (38%).

Most researchers agree that the trendlines showing that fewer people are getting married and that those who do are increasingly better off financially have a lot more to do with the effect of wealth and education on marriage than vice versa. People who are financially stable are just much more likely to find and attract a partner.


More from TIME


&#;It&#;s not that marriage is making people be richer than it used to, it&#;s that marriage is becoming an increasingly elite institution, so that people are are increasingly only getting married if they already have economic advantages,&#; says Philip Cohen, a professor of sociology at the University of Maryland, College Park. &#;Marriage does not make people change their social class, it doesn&#;t make people change their race, and those things are very big predictors of economic outcomes.&#;

This reframing of the issue may explain why fewer men than women find partners, even though men are more likely to be looking for one. The economic pressures on men are stronger. Research has shown that an ability to provide financially is still a more prized asset in men than in women, although the trend is shifting. Some studies go so far as to suggest that the year decrease in the rate of coupling can be attributed largely to global trade and the year decrease in the number of stable and well-paying jobs for American men that it brought with it.

When manufacturing moved overseas, non-college educated men found it more difficult to make a living and thus more difficult to attract a partner and raise a family.

Read More: 42% of Women Say They Have Consistently Felt Burned Out at Work in

But there is also evidence that coupling up improves the economic fortunes of couples, both men and women. It&#;s not that they only have to pay one rent or buy one fridge, say some sociologists who study marriage, it&#;s that having a partner suggests having a future.

&#;There&#;s a way in which marriage makes men more responsible, and that makes them better workers,&#; says University of Virginia sociology professor W. Bradford Wilcox, pointing to a Harvard study that suggests single men are more likely than married men to leave a job before finding another. The Pew report points to a Duke University study that suggests that after marriage men work longer hours and earn more.

There&#;s also evidence that the decline in marriage is not just all about being wealthy enough to afford it. Sincewomen have graduated college in far higher numbers than men.

&#;The B.A. vs. non B.A. gap has grown tremendously on lots of things — in terms of income, in terms of marital status, in terms of cultural markers and tastes,&#; says Cohen. &#;It&#;s become a sharper demarcation over time and I think that&#;s part of what we see with regard to marriage. If you want to lock yourself in a room with somebody for 50 years, you might want to have the same level of education, and just have more in common with them.&#;

Read More: Price Hikes Will Likely Continue Through the End ofFed Signals

Wilcox agrees: &#;You get women who are relatively liberal, having gone to college, and men who are relatively conservative, still living in a working class world, and that can create a kind of political and cultural divide that makes it harder for people to connect romantically as well.&#;

What seems to be clear is that the path to marriage increasingly runs through college. While the figures on single men&#;s declining economic fortunes are the most sobering, they are not what surprised the report&#;s authors the most. &#;It&#;s quite startling how much the partnered women have now outpaced single women,&#; says Richard Fry, a senior researcher at the Pew Research Center. &#;About 43% of partnered women have completed at least a bachelor&#;s degree compared to a third of single women.&#; He speculates that women may be going to college in greater numbers because it helps them attract a partner in the same way it helps men. &#;Not only are they rewarded in the labor market with higher earnings, but increasingly, partnership also depends on educational attainment.&#;

More Must-Read Stories From TIME

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Источник: [alovex.co]
November 11,

In her book American Hookup, Lisa Wade says, based on what some students of color told her, that “in some ways, hookup culture is a white thing.” In this blog post, we use data from an online survey from over 20, American students at 21 colleges and universities to explore what, if any, differences in sexual behavior or attitudes about sex exist between White, Black, conservative woman dating asian man, Latinx, South Asian, and East Asian students.

What We Did

We used data from the Online College Social Life Survey (OCSLS), collected by Paula England between andto compare White, Black, Latinx, East Asian, and South Asian students. (We call these racial groups for brevity, realizing that Latinx is sometimes considered an ethnicity rather than a race.) We examined racial differences separately for men and women and compared groups on attitudes and behaviors. The percents, means, or medians in the graphs below are regression-adjusted to remove any part of racial differences that stems from group differences in age, immigrant status, mother’s education, whether their parents are still together, conservative woman dating asian man, height, and body mass index (BMI). For more details on our models, see the Technical Appendix at the end of this post.

Some Attitudes Show Almost No Racial Differences

On some values and aspirations, racial groups seem remarkably alike. As the two graphs below show, between 90% and 93% of those in every race/gender group of both men and women say they want to marry, and between 89% and 96% of every group want children.

Racial groups also differ little in their ideas of the best age to do these things, with the average age seen as ideal for marriage between 25 and 28 for all groups and the average ideal age for having a first child between 27 and Also, racial groups have in common that, in each group, compared to women, men see a slightly higher age as appropriate for themselves to take on these roles.

One attitude about hooking up also shows virtually no racial differences: in all groups, approximately 70%% of men and women say they would be less interested in a relationship with a person who hooks up fb dating app not working lot, as this graph shows.

Racial Group Differences in Attitudes About Sex

Some attitudes show significant differences by race. One question asked students how much they agree with this statement: “I would not have sex with someone unless I was in love with them.” In every racial group, more women than men agree. Focusing on racial differences, Whites and Blacks are similar in their response, and these two groups are most positive about sex without love, as the graph below shows. Latinx students are more conservative. Asian students are the most conservative in their belief that sex requires love. As the graph shows, among women, white and black women are equally liberal, with only 49% agreeing that sex requires love. A larger 59% of Latinas, 64% of East Asian women, and 76% of South Asian single parent dating agree.

Those who believe sex requires love presumably disapprove of casual sex but might think that sex among students in relationships is okay. A more conservative standard is disapproving of any sex before marriage, conservative woman dating asian man, even in a serious relationship. The graph below shows that South Asians are the most conservative in believing that premarital sex is wrong, while Whites are the most liberal, conservative woman dating asian man Latinx students very close to Whites. Unlike beliefs about whether love is necessary for sex, where Whites and Blacks were very close to each other, these beliefs about whether premarital sex is wrong show Black students to be substantially more conservative than Whites and Latinx students. On the issue of premarital sex, Blacks are closer to the conservative views of Asians, who are the most conservative.

Racial Group Differences in Sexual Behavior

Now we move to behavior, starting with the simplest measure—the percent of conservative woman dating asian man who are still virgins. In our sample, in which the average student was in their second year of college, South Asians have the highest proportion of virgins: 66% of women and 50% of men had never had intercourse. The group with the next highest rate is East Asians. Whites, Blacks, and Latinx students all have lower rates of between 21% and 34% virgins.

Next, we look at the number of hookups since the start of college each group reported. We use the median (the number that the man or woman at the 50thpercentile had) rather than the mean (the average) because the median is less influenced by the few students who reported extremely high numbers of hookups. Among men, Asians have the lowest number of hookups, with a median of one hook up, Latinx men are next with a little above two, and Whites and Blacks are the highest with almost identical medians at approximately three hookups. Among women, we Black and East or South Asian women have hooked up little, Latinx women are in the middle, White women have hooked up the most. While this shows that hooking up is most prevalent among whites, it also shows that it is certainly not only a “white thing.” Indeed, among men, as we saw it is done about the same amount by Black and White men.

Of course, conservative woman dating asian man, knowing the rate at which students are hooking up does not tell us how much they have casual intercourse, because not all hookups involve intercourse.  As students define the term “hookup,” a hookup may involve little or conservative woman dating asian man nothing more than making out, and these data show that about 40% of hookups involve intercourse. To get at whether students had had casual intercourse, the survey asked if they had ever had sex outside of an exclusive relationship. The question didn’t clarify what was meant by “sex.” However, there is lots of qualitative evidence that heterosexual students usually take the term to mean intercourse, whereas a majority of what they call hookups do not involve intercourse.

As the next graph shows, Asians are the least likely to have had sex outside an exclusive relationship.  This is partly a reflection of the fact that many haven’t had intercourse at all, as we saw above. Black, White, and Latinx students have had more casual intercourse, and within-sex, race differences are fairly small in these three groups.  In every group other than East Asians, men are more likely to report dating a belgian woman outside a relationship than women.

Another behavioral indicator is the number of partners with whom one has ever had intercourse. In this analysis, virgins count as having zero partners, and we limited the conservative woman dating asian man to the number of partners of the other sex, ignoring any same-sex partners. We examine conservative woman dating asian man rather than averages because there are some extreme outliers with many partners, which affect means more than medians. The graph below shows that among both women and men, Asians have had the least number of partners, conservative woman dating asian man. Among women, there is little difference between Whites, Blacks, and Latinas, conservative woman dating asian man, all of whom have had between and 2 partners, conservative woman dating asian man. Among men, however, Blacks have substantially more than other men, with a median slightly more than 4, compared to between 2 and for Whites and Latinx men, and less for Asian men.

Explaining Racial Dating sites for mature adults and Race-Gender Intersections

We have shown that racial groups are virtually identical on whether and when they want to marry and have alovex.cor, there are some group differences in attitudes about students having sex, and in their sexual behavior.

Where we see differences, Asians, especially South Asians, appear the most conservative in attitudes and behavior, Latinx students are in the middle, and either Whites or Blacks are generally the most permissive, depending on the issue. In this blog post, we can’t fully answer the complicated questions of what causes these differences, but we offer some ideas, with online dating attractiveness data to back them up.

Over 95% of both the East Asian and South Asian students in our study are either first- or second-generation immigrants – that is, either they conservative woman dating asian man themselves born outside the U.S., or one or both of their parents were. We speculate free dating site for married the relatively conservative attitudes and less active sexual behavior of Asians result from the influence of their immigrant parents from Asia. Fewer, but a still high 82%, of the Latinx students california dating apps our study are first- or second-generation immigrants, so this explanation may apply somewhat to them as well. By contrast, only 16% of Whites and 35% of Black students in the study are immigrants or had an immigrant parent. (See the technical appendix for more details on this.)

As for differences between Blacks and other racial groups, the patterns differ strongly by gender. As many race and gender scholars have argued, an intersectional approach is often needed when the way race affects men and women is very different. Let us start with men. Black men have had more sexual partners than White or other men, conservative woman dating asian man. What explains this?  Prior research has shown that youth of any race who grow up in poverty or with less educated parents are more likely to have first intercourse earlier and Blacks are especially likely to grow up disadvantaged. Consistent with this, past research on the age of sexual debut among US adolescents, has shown that Black youth have an earlier age at first intercourse than Whites, which is likely to lead to more sexual experience by the age of most of the college respondents. (The survey question asks about number of partners ever, not only during college, so having started during or before high school could lead to a higher lifetime number.)

The difference between White and Black men’s median partners is —with Black men having a median of and White men partners. To test how much of this is explained by Black men having had an earlier age at first intercourse, we re-estimated the regression analysis controlling for this factor and created adjusted medians assigning the age at first intercourse for the sample as a whole to all races of men. The new adjusted median number of partners is only .7 apart rather than apart, implying that about two-thirds of the gap is explained by differences in age at first intercourse. Thus, conservative woman dating asian man, the White-Black differences among men may reflect less about different behavior at college and more about the early effects of disadvantage leading to early first sex.

However, if the explanation we offered for Black men were just about socioeconomic disadvantage, we would expect to find it applicable to Black women too. Instead, we found that Black women students are significantly more likely to be virgins than White women, they have had about the same number of intercourse partners as White women, and they have had substantially fewer hookups than either White women or Latinas. Moreover, they are more likely to think premarital sex is wrong than any race-gender group the best online dating sites than South Asian women. Why are Black women more conservative than other racial groups on many indicators, while Black men are more liberal? We suggest two possible explanations. It may be in part because Black women are aware of stereotypes of Blacks as hypersexual, and, given the gendered double standard that shames women more than men for casual sex, black women may feel the responsibility to behave in a way that doesn’t reinforce racial stereotypes usually seen as pejorative. A second possible explanation for the fact that Black women are more likely to be virgins and have fewer hookups is that Black women may be less sought after as partners than women of other races, a race-gender-specific bias in the erotic hierarchy.

 

Technical Appendix: Data, conservative woman dating asian man, Measures, and Statistical Procedures

Data

We used data from the Online College Social Life Survey (OCSLS). The OCSLS surveyed over 20, students from 21 four-year colleges and universities between and The colleges and universities where the survey was administered were both private and public.

A limitation of the OCSLS survey is that participants surveyed did not come from a probability sample. However, because the instructors in the courses hosting the survey gave students extra credit, participation in these classes was nearly %. Thus, any non-representativeness of the sample is likely caused by the schools chosen and the kinds of students in the hosting courses, not who decided to participate within classes. Also helpful to the representativeness of the sample is the fact that, although the hosting classes were mostly sociology, only approximately 10% of respondents were sociology majors.

Students were asked their race or ethnicity, which we used to divide them into White, Black, Latinx, East Asian, or South Asian. (Students in other groups, such as Native American, were not used because other groups were too small for reliable analyses.)

The outcome measures used are questions about sexual behavior and attitudes.

Attitudes

We used the following questions (see bullets below) to tap attitudes and dating a guy with a open relationship regarding sex.

For this question, we divided students into two groups—those who chose “not wrong at all,” the most permissive answer, and those who took the more restrictive view that premarital sex is ‘always,’ ‘almost always,’ or ‘sometimes’ wrong.

For the two questions above, response categories were; strongly agree, agree, disagree, conservative woman dating asian man, or strongly disagree. We divided the responses into a more permissive group who disagreed or strongly disagreed and a more restrictive group who agreed or strongly agreed.

Respondents answered yes, no, don’t know, or already married. We deleted those already married then dichotomized into those who said yes, versus those who said no or don’t know.

Respondents answered yes or no.

Respondents who wanted to get married or have children gave an exact age for the two questions above.

Behavior 

Regarding sexual behavior and hooking up, students were asked:

Responses were yes and no.

The numbers students gave for the two kinds of hookups above were added together to get their total number of hookups.

Models

The graphs above show regression-adjusted averages, medians, or percents. That is, these percents or numbers are predicted values from a regression predicting the attitude or behavior from: age (entered linearly), immigration status (categorized into whether the student was a first-generation immigrant, had at least one parent who was an immigrant, or was not an immigrant and did not have a parent who was), respondent’s mother’s education (high school only, less than high school, some college, bachelor’s degree, graduate degree), whether respondent’s parents online dating tips safety conservative woman dating asian man together, indicators for school attended, height, and body mass index (BMI).

Using the regression equations, for each outcome we predicted a mean, median, or percent for each racial group, using an average marginal dating a south american girl approach, such that each racial group was assigned the whole sample distribution of all control variables, thus giving each group the same distribution on these controls, and thus “controlling for” these factors. In the case of predicted averages and percents, the regression was an OLS regression. Where the variable was a dichotomy, this OLS is a linear probability model. In the case of medians, we used a conditional quantile regression. Separate regressions were done for men and women. Interestingly, racial group differences were very similar to those found in simple descriptive statistics on each group calculated with no regression adjustment.

In the post, we suggest that having immigrant parents from nations with somewhat more conservative sexual norms may explain the more conservative beliefs and behavior of South and East Asian students, and, to a lesser extent of Latinx students, conservative woman dating asian man. The attentive reader may wonder why we say this when our model includes immigration status as a control variable, implying that the differences we find “hold immigration status constant.” Our model accomplishes this only if we assume that the effect of immigration status is constant across groups (technically, that there is no interaction between race and immigration status). However, our earlier posts Do Immigrants Have More Conservative Sexual Attitudes Than Other College Students? and What Does Studying College Sex Tell Us About Immigrant Assimilation? showed that this is not true.

Among whites, immigrant status has little effect on sexual attitudes or behavior, perhaps because white immigrants are mostly Canadians, Europeans, and Australians, and the sexual norms in these countries are not so different than those in the United States, conservative woman dating asian man. Since Whites are the most numerous in the sample, the effects of immigration status that are used in the regression adjustment in this post, which are for the sample as a whole, are dominated by the small effects for whites. Thus, the model does not adequately adjust for the effect of having immigrant conservative woman dating asian man on Asian and Latinx students, leaving open the possibility that this may be the explanation for their more conservative sexual behavior.

In one supplementary model discussed above, to explore how much of the Black/White difference among men in number of intercourse partners is explained by an earlier age at first intercourse, we run an additional quantile regression for men predicting number of partners from all the variables in all the regressions discussed above, plus age at first vaginal intercourse (represented with indicator variables for “14 or younger,” “15 to 19,” and “20 or older,” which included virgins). We then used the regression results to predict number of partners separately for Black and White men assuming they each had the sample-wide distribution on age at first intercourse. (We also assumed they had the sample-wide mean on other variables, but that adjustment was already reflected in the graphs shown.)

Data Access

Researchers who wish to use the OCSLS data can contact Emma Mishel at ekm@alovex.co for information on how to download the data.

*Note: Numbers shown are means except when indicated that they are medians. In the case of dichotomized variables, the means (X) are the percent in the category indicated by the variable name.

*Note: Numbers shown are means except when indicated that they are medians. In the case of dichotomized variables, the means (X) are the percent in the category indicated by the variable name.


Emma Patton is an undergraduate Sociology major, Paula England is Silver Professor of Sociology, and Andrew Levine is a doctoral student in Sociology. All are at New York University.

Источник: [alovex.co]

The white women who flipped: the price of changing your conservative views

“I love you,” Chera Sherman’s mother told her before driving away in her Jeep Cherokee, leaving her daughter, then 19, bawling fat tears in front of her boyfriend’s home in Laurel, conservative woman dating asian man, Mississippi.

It wasand Sherman had made the life-altering mistake of falling in love with Jerry Breland, a lanky, black year-old she’d met through a friend back when she worked at Kmart.

Her mother had finally told her stepfather about their six-month relationship earlier that day after a local cop pulled Breland over while he was driving his girlfriend’s yellow Sunbird. When her stepfather heard she was violating his code against race-mixing, conservative woman dating asian man, he drove to her job to tell her she had to move out.

“White men aren’t going to want you,” her father told her.

They allowed her to collect only what she could carry. The teenager couldn’t take her bedding or her jewelry – she even had to leave her car. “I love ya, but I just can’t have this,” her stepfather said as she grabbed random items.

In the car, the teen was hysterical the whole way; she was crazy about her boyfriend, but she didn’t want to be an orphan. She loved her family, too. “You made this decision,” her mother said, adding that she didn’t agree with her husband but had no control over it: he was the man of the house. And with that, she drove off.

Racism was the required way of life in Sherman’s mostly segregated community. When she was four, she had called a black man the N-word in public anime and gaming dating sites that’s what she believed black people were called. The man was mortified, and her family members had laughed.

Inside, her boyfriend’s father told her she could sleep on the couch until the couple could get an apartment. They found one, but the owner kicked them out after a month when he realized Breland was black. They then landed a rental house where the landlord only cared about the color green.

Although she’d made good grades and planned to enroll at a community college that fall, higher education never happened for Sherman due to the obligations the couple took on to be together. He now works offshore on an oil rig; she takes care of their two boys.

‘Gaslighting is an art form perfected by conservatives’

Still happily married after 25 romanian dating app, Sherman-Breland now believes many women pay the price – through abuse, rejection or public humiliation – for rejecting America’s rat’s nest of conservatism and racism that has exploded into full relief in Trump’s America.

“I can’t tell you the countless number of times younger Caucasian girls who are going through the same exact thing have reached out to me for advice,” she says now.

The south isn’t alone in its paternalism and sexism, but it is still a high art form here. “It is absolutely taught,” Sherman-Breland says. “You understand as a young girl that your place is behind your man, not in front or beside him. You cannot have your own opinions. That’s the most prevalent way they keep you in check.”

Sherman-Breland gradually went against her family’s broader conservative political beliefs as she became concerned about the future of her biracial sons, but it took hearing people she conservative woman dating asian man calling President Obama “the devil”, and Donald Trump’s open bigotry and birtherism, to electrify her. She now calls herself a proud liberal.

Most conservative wedge issues trace back to racism and sexism, she argues, adding conservative woman dating asian man those poison beliefs take many shapes: abortion and immigration might make white people the minority; affirmative action gives the supposedly inferior an equal shot at jobs and education; public assistance benefits “freeloaders” of color.

White women continue to embrace such prevalent mores. “We’re helping you be a better woman. You’ll be stronger as a submissive Christian,” she says, mocking local white conservatives.

Sherman-Breland used to be anti-abortion herself, and while she doubts conservative men would actually mtf lesbians dating Roe v Wade – abortion is useful to them if they get the wrong women pregnant – she says they instead use it to get religious women to vote against their best interests. Abortion, she says, conservative woman dating asian man, is what keeps many women she knows from quietly pulling a more progressive voting lever, especially after hearing Trump or Roy Moore next door in Alabama seem to justify sexual assault.

“Gaslighting is an art form perfected by conservatives in the south,” she says, wrinkling her nose.

The hypocrisy kills her. College wasn’t an option for her parents, either, who worked at garment factories. “We relied on social programs conservative woman dating asian man eat,” she says, her smirk dripping with irony. “Not that they were lazy.”

No free pass for white women

White supremacy and all its destructive deep-seated beliefs are, like other forms of barbarism, usually ascribed to men. But historian Elizabeth Gillespie McRae warns that it is a mistake to give white women a pass while ignoring their role in America’s systemic conservative woman dating asian man wrong with white women?” – a common question after the election – is due to an amnesia, according to McRae, a history professor at Western Carolina University. McRae’s book, Mothers of Massive Resistance: White Women and the Politics of White Supremacy, illuminates powerful grassroots alliances of women across the country that conservative woman dating asian man to keep segregation alive in the 20th century.

“Segregation’s constant gardeners,” as McRae calls those women, distributed myth-filled textbooks and created student essay contests justifying white supremacy in public schools. They also enforced “racial integrity laws” used to kick someone who had “non-white” blood out of school, or have their marriage license refused.

Many of them were educated – some suffragists and newspaperwomen or even union advocates – and they purposefully helped create the twisted race politics that Sherman-Breland describes.

As the civil rights movement gained power, southern segregationists knew they were going to lose, McRae says, and they joined forces with conservatives nationally who coded their own racism. “Outside of the south, they needed to minimize overt racial language and instead talk about ‘constitutional government’,” McRae says. “Campaigning against social welfare and the safety net served their segregation purposes, too.”

Segregationist women used black-inferiority myths to bolster explosive anti-busing protests in Conservative woman dating asian man in the s, McRae adds. “It’s not to say that all conservatives are white supremacists, but that white supremacists and segregationist politics animated and shaped the new right,” McRae conservative woman dating asian man. “Folks advocating various forms of segregation were all over the nation.”

And they still are. White women, she says, are still often the loudest voices in these battles to keep children of color and/or poverty from “tainting” schools.

‘I wasn’t taught real history’

Lynne Schneider, 49, grew up in Lawrence county, Mississippi. Schneider’s early views were shaped in the Southern Baptist church, but saying the N-word was frowned upon instagram profile adult dating website scam then, and her working-class parents didn’t allow it.

But in her public school, which was about two-thirds white, black kids sat on conservative woman dating asian man own side of the cafeteria, and white children like Schneider went to a “private” pool that didn’t allow African Americans.

Young Schneider believed her elders when they said everything was equal between races, or that the south fought the civil war for honorable reasons and not over slavery. “I wasn’t exactly an examining person. I wasn’t taught real history,” she says, adding that her textbooks were filled with romantic myths about the Old South.

That wasn’t by accident, historian McRae says. Starting in the early 20th century, a well-funded group of women descended from Confederate soldiers, conservative woman dating asian man, were desperate to rewrite the reasons why their fathers and grandfathers fought in the civil war, conservative woman dating asian man. Daughters of the Confederacy leadersworked diligently to ensure that textbooks pushed conservative woman dating asian man slave” lies and pride in European colonialism. They even worked with new teachers’ unions to pass on revisionist books to black public schools.

As an adult, Schneider emulated women around her, voting Republican when she was She married a conservative man and became a teacher. By the time she came to Murrah high school in Jackson, Mississippi, inthe formerly all-white school was majority-black. Today at 95% black, it is, astonishingly, the whitest public school in the capital city.

There she met an English teacher, a white woman, who challenged her to think deeper on issues such as abortion and gay rights. Later, her black students helped change her “small government” conservative beliefs which, she realized, keep schools underfunded and subject to constant attacks.

The students also pushed back when she messed up.

One day, Schneider told a class to “stop acting like BeBe kids,” a term used in the black community to reference misbehaving kids.

“You’re calling us ratchet ghetto kids,” they charged.

Schneider apologized for hurting them. “I still make mistakes,” she told them.

To “step out of the ignorance and blinders” of her upbringing, Schneider attended race dialogues and trainings such as Teaching for Change, but she warns other whites not to get high-and-mighty. “When a white person decides they’re so ‘woke’, they can be a little too quick to know more about black people than black people. Adult single casual dating virginia washington dc matter how clued in you are, you’re still white,” she warns.

She knows plenty of white women who are scared to reject their conservative upbringing, even if their beliefs have morphed, conservative woman dating asian man, too. “They don’t want to fall out of favor, not be accepted,” she says. “Mississippi is like a football game. People want to be on the winning team. If you’re not conservative here, you have to get used to your side losing.”

‘I had $, a suitcase and a child’

Anna McNeill’s first husband punched her in the hip one day, leaving a bruise the size of a grapefruit. He told her later she must have run into a piece of furniture.

He soon made it clear she had to mirror his beliefs. That included voting the same. Both were religious conservatives – he had attended seminary – so the compliance did not immediately seem onerous. But she soon learned what complete control felt like.

“As long as he didn’t how to recognize and online dating scammer on me, beat me or spend all of our money on gambling or whatever, he said I should count myself lucky,” McNeill, now 39, says. He told her he was the only one who would put up with her, and quoted the Bible to ensure that she was fully submissive to him and isolated from friends and family.

“The gaslighting was the main thing, right?” she says. “I doubted myself.”

She finally left him. “I had $, a suitcase and a child. I didn’t have resources.”

Therapy helped her question the family-values party line she and her husband followed. “I was conservative but starting to feel pretty disenfranchised by the Republican party,” she says.

McNeill soon remarried and had two more children with a second husband. He was ultra-conservative and his views on race disturbed her. “If I contested, I worried he would make my children suffer. Depression will suck all the fight out of you.”

She eventually left him, too. Now, she is happily alone with her children and involved in causes she believes in, trying to do domestic-violence advocacy work full time. “My interest in criminal justice reform came about because of my interest in domestic violence,” she says. “I started realizing a lot of these people that were incarcerated came from traumatic backgrounds.”

Still deeply religious, McNeill believes in “limited government” and says Trump proves how dangerous too much power can be in a bad leader’s hands, conservative woman dating asian man. “I tend now to lean more toward libertarian, which is big enough for both liberals and conservatives,” she says, adding that the government should stay out of all marriage decisions, including same-sex.

McNeil is still anti-abortion. She says probably nine out of 10 white women she knows who voted for Trump in backed him only because of his stance on abortion, looking past his distasteful traits because the issue is “ a human rights issue” to them. “If you believe that is a person, then you have to protect that person,” she says.

Do anti-choice conservative woman dating asian man believe Trump really cares about abortion? “Oh, no,” McNeill says, laughing. “They thought he was more likely to appoint judges who would address that issue. Almost every single person says, ‘I will hold my nose. He’s in there four to eight years, but those judges are conservative woman dating asian man life’.”

The fear of communism and socialism

In the late s, conservative woman dating asian man, Jan Levy Mattiace’s half-Jewish father and Methodist mother pulled her out of public school and enrolled her in a new segregation academy. Although her father was more progressive than most, many white parents then rejected public schools due to the red scare, during which white leaders, segregation academies and the Ku Klux Klan drummed up fear of the supposedly putrid mix of civil rights and communism.

“As children, we did not realize what was going on,” Mattiace says now, adding that she’s happy to see racial diversity in her alma mater today. The most recent US Department of Education numbers show Conservative woman dating asian man Canton Academy was 85% white, 12% black, 2% Hispanic and 1% Asian as of the school year. The town of Canton is 71% black.

In the s, Mattiace became the political director of the Mississippi Republican party before, she says, conservative woman dating asian man extreme-right took over the GOP. She recruited more black members even as national strategists like Lee Atwaterhelped perfect the bigoted “southern strategy” to draw racist voters from a shifting Democratic party to the GOP.

Today, at age 55, Mattiace is on the board of Dialogue Jackson, which hosts race conversations across political divides. She voted for the black Democrat Mike Espy against Cindy Hyde-Smith for Senate last November and now calls herself a “centrist” who may vote for a Democrat for governor this year.

“I land between Colin Powell and George Herbert Walker Bush,” she says. But, she adds, “I am not a feminist.” She is for equal rights, respect and opportunity for women, however, and is now married to a commercial developer who decidedly does conservative woman dating asian man tell her how to vote.

Polarization between the left and right have long worried her, but Donald Trump concerns her more. Many of her friends may vote for him a second time in But for them it’s not about abortion, or following their husbands’ orders. “It was a vote against Hillary, conservative woman dating asian man. Or against the Democratic agenda. They feel like that’s a danger,” Mattiace says. They find Trump conservative woman dating asian man than the communist horrors many learned about at home and school.

“There’s a fear of moving into a socialist society,” Mattiace says. “They’re people that may have relatives in socialist countries … that are grasping for groceries and have to take a number to buy food. Trying to redistribute wealth fairly like that, it becomes chaotic, a war zone.”

Can people truly change?

People can change, as Sherman-Breland and her husband have learned. They stayed in the same county, marrying a decade after her mother dumped her in front of Breland’s house that day.

Over time, Sherman’s family fell in love with their grandchildren and with Breland – even her stepfather. “When he died inhe was probably closer to Jerry than anyone else in his life,” she says of her stepdad.

Her husband never top 5 dating sites in usa nor expected an apology, however.

Sherman-Breland is concerned about Trump dragging old-school racism out of the hall closet, conservative woman dating asian man. He is making people backslide into open hatefulness, dividing families like hers around the country, she says.

She worries especially about what Trumpism is doing to her own family’s loving detente. “When my family started supporting Trump and the ideals of conservative woman dating asian man his rhetoric, it was literally like reliving all of that hurt again,” she says.

“I know they love us. But their support of this rise in white supremacy is devastating all over again. It has ripped my family apart. Again.”

Источник: [alovex.co]

Dating attitudes and expectations among young Chinese adults: an examination of gender differences

The Journal of Chinese Sociologyvolume 3, Article number: 12 () Cite this article

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Abstract

While researchers have long examined the dating and mate selection patterns among young adults, the vast majority have utilized Western samples. In order to further our understanding of the changing nature of dating behaviors and attitudes, this study examines a sample of young Chinese adults and focuses upon the conservative woman dating asian man differences therein. Using a foundation of social exchange theory, the analyses illustrate the differences between the dating attitudes and expectations of Chinese women and men. Per traditional expectations, conservative woman dating asian man, both sexes place a low priority on sexual behaviors, yet more progressive attitudes and behaviors are also evident. Women, in particular, appear to be more focused on pragmatic qualities in prospective partners. The influence of individualist values and the changing cultural norms pertaining to dating and familial roles are discussed.

Dating and romantic relationships are a normal, yet essential, part of life during the adolescent and early adult years. Beyond the basic desires which most individuals experience during this time, researchers have noted the relative significance of dating, not only for individuals but also for societies. The initiation and maintenance of intimate, romantic relationships have been linked with improved physical and emotional well-being, stronger perceptions of community attachment, and better developmental outcomes for the individuals (e.g., conservative woman dating asian man, Amato ; Braithwaite et al. ; Proulx et al. ). During adolescence and the early adult years, dating enhances identity formation for individuals and provides socialization experiences which are necessary to forming and maintaining intimate and interpersonal relationships in life (Chen et al. ). Although researchers have directed their efforts toward a better understanding of the dynamics of dating and partner selection, focusing upon the influence of such elements as the family environment (e.g., parental divorce, parental marital quality, parent-child relationships), peer relationships, and community factors (Bryant and Conger ; Cui and Fincham ; Yoshida and Busby ), the majority of studies focusing upon dating and romantic relationships have utilized samples of Western youth.

In China, marriage and family life continues to be a central element within Chinese culture, with adolescents and young adults typically assuming that they will eventually find a partner. What is lacking, conservative woman dating asian man, however, is a broader understanding of how contemporary Chinese youth view dating and intimate relationships. Researchers have noted this shortcoming and have called for greater empirical examination of partner selection in contemporary urban China (Xu et al. ) and particularly the attitudinal and expectational dimensions of dating (Hu and Scott ) and how these might vary by gender (Shek ). The present study will seek to address these calls for empirical study by using a sample of Chinese college students to examine the nature of attitudes and expectations concerning dating among young adults in contemporary China. The analyses which follow will attempt to more accurately discern the nature of such attitudes and expectations, as well as differences which may exist between females and males.

Dating and relationships

From a generational perspective, dating and romantic relationships in China are regarded differently, as adolescents and young adults may have more progressive beliefs, as compared to their parents. Researchers have noted that Chinese parents tend to oppose conservative woman dating asian man dating (Chen et al. ), perhaps due to their more traditional perspectives. While there is no clear definition of what is an appropriate age for individuals to begin dating, those who begin dating at early ages will typically have to cope with the opposition of parents (Wu ). Nonetheless, conservative woman dating asian man, there is widespread acceptance that dating is becoming increasingly popular among Chinese youth (Tang and Zuo ).

Among Chinese college students, in particular, dating has quickly elevated in popularity (Yang ). Even the behaviors within dating appear to be rapidly changing over time. Behaviors such as holding hands and kissing in public, which may been somewhat taboo only a few decades ago, in China, are now conservative woman dating asian man increasingly commonplace (Xia and Zhou ; Yang ). For such populations, conservative woman dating asian man, who are often away from the eyes of their parents, college life may present opportunities for not only dating but also sexual activity (Xia and Zhou ). Lei () reports that over one third of college students in China had friends with benefits dating site sexually active while enrolled in school. While dating and sexual activity among Chinese college students have been previously noted by researchers (e.g., Xu ), conservative woman dating asian man, comparatively less is known about the attitudes and expectations of youth free sex only dating sites these behaviors. In regard to premarital sex, for example, some studies have reported that 86 % of respondents approve of it (see Tang and Zuo ), while other studies have noted that vast majority of men want their brides to be virgins at the time of marriage (Ji ).

Seemingly, contemporary Chinese college students may be adopting a perspective of dating and intimate relationships which focuses less on paths toward marriage and more on immediate pleasure and gratification (Yang ). Much of this may also related to institutional changes, as the interpersonal relationships of students have been somewhat suppressed by colleges and universities (Aresu ). Universities commonly attempt to discourage sexual activity among students through educational programs and policies (Aresu ). Nonetheless, a comparison of college students in and revealed that self-reported premarital sexual intercourse rates went from to 32 %, respectively (Pan ). Not surprisingly, Chinese parents tend to strongly discourage their conservative woman dating asian man and sons from becoming sexual active, and many are opposed to their children being involved in dating relationships, at all (Stevenson and Zusho ).

The social and cultural context of dating

Aspects of dating, such as appropriate behaviors within dating and the appropriate age at which to begin dating, are greatly influenced by the larger social context in which they occur (Chen et al. ). Similarly, researchers have noted that attitudes and expectations concerning dating and intimate relationships are also affected by the larger cultural context (Hynie et al. ; Sprecher et al. ; Yan ). But China’s cultural context goes back several thousands of years. It has a written language that has been in use for the longest continuous period of time in the world, and it has the oldest written history (Han ). Thus, in order to best understand and appreciate the social dynamics occurring in present day China, one should first examine some of the important long-standing traditions connected to its culture.

The traditional expectations concerning dating and marriage have a long dating guy that has teenager within Chinese culture and are based heavily upon ancestor worship and Confucian ideology. From this perspective, filial piety and the continuation of family lineage are of tremendous importance (Han ). Hence, marriage (as the end goal of intimate relationships) is absolutely necessary and particularly so for males (Liu et al. ). One of the enduring cultural traits is “xiao,” which, conservative woman dating asian man, in the most basic sense, refers to filial piety. The Chinese character for “xiao” can visually be interpreted as a child with an old man on his back (Han ). The long-standing expectation of “xiao” is that children devote their lives, without question, to their parents and families. This involves, especially for sons, conservative woman dating asian man, the care for parents in their elderly years (see Ho ). Understandably, this places great pressure upon unmarried sons to negotiate with his parents over the identification and selection of a suitable wife, who, in turn, will also provide assistance to his aging parents. For sons, in particular, “xiao” makes finding a spouse a priority and consequently makes dating take on a different quality.

China is typically regarded as a collectivistic culture, in which obligations to the greater society and social institutions (e.g., the family) are considered more important than individual traits and needs (Kwang ; Ting-Toomey et al. ). Within individualistic cultures, online dating age lies love is regarded as essential to marital satisfaction and well-being (Dion and Dion ). Hence, individual choice within dating relationships and mate selection processes is more likely to occur within individualistic cultures. Collectivistic cultures prompt young adults to regard love and romantic relationships within the larger context of their familial and societal obligations (Yang ). This, then, may lead young adults within collectivistic cultures to emphasize the pragmatic functions of dating and eventual marriage, while having less concern with notions of “love” on line dating service free; “romance” (Hsu ).

Following the end of the reign of Mao Tse-tung, along with the collapse of the former USSR, a fairly rapid pace of social, political, and economic changes occurred in China (e.g., Croll ; Tang and Parish ; Wang ). The single fathers dating Chinese government has steadily encouraged economic modernization and the development of economic practices based upon free market principles similar to those found in Westernized countries. Social policies, such as the notable “One-Child Policy,” have been relaxed over recent years (Denyer ), allowing for individuals to better seek mates who are compatible in terms of number of children they desire to procreate. Whereas Chinese culture once emphasized the role of family in the selection of partners, conservative woman dating asian man, with a strong tendency toward arranged marriages (Yang ), young Chinese adults now have greater choice in such decisions (Xu ). When combined with other changes, such as higher rates of educational attainment for women (Li ; Wu and Zhang ) and increased sexual activity among young adults (Feng and Quanhe ), it is likely that both culture preferences and actual behaviors concerning dating and mate selection may be undergoing substantial changes in China, as well.

The economic changes have had a considerable effect upon traditional family structures and behaviors. The collectivist nature of Chinese culture has been altered by economic factors in several substantial ways (see Yang ). First, there has been a steady shift away from collectivism toward individualism, causing people to give priorities to their own needs, rather than those of their family or larger society. Second, traditional marital relationships, often formed as a matter of practicality, have diminished and been replaced by a preference for relationships based on romance and Western notions of love. Finally, conservative woman dating asian man, Chinese women, by virtue of their increasing educational and occupational attainment, now have greater economic independence, thus lowering their need to secure a spouse as a way of ensuring financial security. Hence, the traditional combination of marriage, sex, and family, as upheld by long-standing Chinese cultural expectations, has become less influential, particularly in regard to serving as a foundation of dating and partner selection.

Younger cohorts, who have had greater exposure to increasing individualism and Western culture, may approach dating and mate selection in a different manner from the previous generation. However, these younger cohorts must also recognize the existence of long-standing norms, as conservative woman dating asian man obligation remains a very tangible value in Chinese culture (Chui and Hong ), and continues to bind children to their parents. Indeed, recent studies have suggested that dating (Kim ) and decisions within marriage, itself, are still strongly affected by Chinese parents (Pimentel ). Given the relative paucity of research on dating and intimate relationships within China, it is difficult to accurately discern how these changes may be affecting young adults’ dating behaviors. When combined with other changes, such as migration, urbanization, income growth, increased social inequality, consumer culture, mass media, the Internet, and personal communication devices, some qualitative research suggest that both attitudes and actual behaviors concerning dating and mate selection are undergoing change in at least one of China’s largest cities. Research in Taiwan suggests that young adults are shifting their perspectives on dating and romance, away from traditional expectations (see Chang and Chan ), conservative woman dating asian man. Zhang and Bromance taking place of dating relationships (), using a sample from mainland China, found that many young adults found their partner on their own accord but still maintained a desire to satisfy their parents’ wishes. In contemporary China, it is quite likely that both traditional expectations and newer, more modern attitudes concerning dating and partner selection are present. Whether one set of expectations is more influential, or if there is a merger or evolution of new attitudes concerning dating and partner selection, remains to be seen.

Gender and dating

Among Chinese youth, attitudes and expectations concerning dating and intimate relationships will also likely vary between females best milf dating site males. Conservative woman dating asian man terms of dating and partner preferences, researchers have noted a considerable difference between the sexes, conservative woman dating asian man, with a substantial double standard still prevailing (Piotrowski et al. ). For men, the ideal quality in a woman is beauty, while for women, the ideal quality in a man is intelligence (Xia and Zhou ). Generally, Chinese women are expected to marry at an earlier age, while they are still at the peak of their physical appearance and capacity to bear children, whereas men are expected to marry at a later age, after conservative woman dating asian man have achieved financial success (Piotrowski et al. ). Recent studies suggest that stereotyped perceptions of young men and women exist (Jankowiak and Li ). Men conservative woman dating asian man more often regarded as serious, ambitious, stubborn, deceitful, independent, and powerful, while women are viewed as quiet, anxious, excitable, gentle, depressed, shy, and jealous (Jankowiak and Li ).

In order to more fully comprehend these gender differences within Chinese culture, a much longer historical context must be considered. Gender ideologies in China have long been founded upon the general belief that women are supposed to be submissive and secondary to men (Bloodworth ). With Confucian philosophy, women are expected to maintain the three rules of obedience: (1) obeying their fathers and brothers prior to marriage, (2) obeying their husbands within marriage, and (3) as a widow, obeying their adult sons (Chia et al, conservative woman dating asian man. ; Yang ). This set of beliefs, while seemingly outdated in contemporary society, is nonetheless one which has a very long existence within the Chinese culture. Indeed, several studies have suggested that even in the face of modernization and the influence of Western culture, traditional gender attitudes may persist. Researchers have found that many Chinese adults maintain traditional beliefs concerning the division of household labor (Cook and Dong ) and the responsibilities of child care (Rosen ). Males are still generally assumed to occupy the provider role within the family (Chia et al. ).

The relative roles and status of Chinese females and males have been patriarchal in nature for many centuries, yet these long-standing differences may be changing. In terms of educational attainment, for example, women’s educational attainment rates, which had previously lagged far behind those of men, are now rising. Indeed, both in terms of enrollment and completion rates, women now exceed men in Chinese colleges and universities (Wu and Zhang ). Women’s employment, which has always been guaranteed within China, is conservative woman dating asian man par with that of men. Higher levels of educational attainment, coupled with comparable conservative woman dating asian man and earnings levels, may lead Chinese women to maintain more egalitarian attitudes concerning gender and gender conservative woman dating asian man. How these gendered expectations affect contemporary dating attitudes and behaviors, though, is yet unknown.

While addressing gender-related issues which may affect the dating and mate selection patterns of young Chinese adults, it is equally necessary to address the sex ratio of the population, itself. One lasting effect of the one-child policy, when combined with the traditional preference for sons, is that the current adult population contains more males than females. Currently (based on census data), conservative woman dating asian man, the sex ratio for the population of never-married individuals, 15 years of age and above, is (Liu et al. ). Despite the recent changes to the one-child policy, the skewed sex ratio is expected to create a male marriage “squeeze” for at least a few more decades, thus making it difficult for the current adult male population to find a wife (Guilmoto ). It is quite likely that the sex ratio will have an impact, not only upon mate selection but also the preceding dating behaviors. South and Trent () have noted that the sex ratio imbalance is associated with higher levels of premarital sex among Chinese women but is associated with lower levels of premarital sex among men.

Understanding gender differences in dating

Numerous perspectives have been offered as attempts to explain gender differences which have been identified within dating and intimate relationships. Buss and his colleagues (Buss et al. ; Buss ) have suggested that there is an evolutionary basis for such differences. Males, in this perspective, will seek females with greater physical attractiveness, youth, and chastity, while females will seek out males with greater resources (i.e., financial), intelligence, and ambition. Male preferences will be based upon their desire to obtain a suitable mating partner, for the purpose of bearing offspring, conservative woman dating asian man, while female preferences will be based upon their desire for a provider/protector. Although this perspective has generated considerable debate, it does not readily address differences which may results from a specific cultural context.

Exchange theory may provide a foundation for better understanding the nature of dating and partner selection in China, conservative woman dating asian man. Parrish and Farrer () posit that gender roles within China have undergone considerable change, due to both micro-level mechanisms of bargaining (e.g., within couple’s relationships) and macro-level shifts in existing social institutions (e.g., educational and occupational institutions). Given the dramatic increases in both Chinese women’s educational attainment and greater occupational attainment, they now have greater status in many situations, specifically in regard to bargaining and decision-making within personal relationships (Gittings ; Guthrie ). From a historical perspective, the New Marriage Law of helped to set into motion a shift toward improved statuses for women, by legalizing gender equality and freedom of choice in both 60 year old woman dating younger man and divorce. These improvements have, in turn, set the stage for a considerable shift away from more traditional forms of dating and mate selection and have also made conservative woman dating asian man potential “Westernization” of ideologies surrounding romance and dating relationships even more likely (Hatfield and Rapson ).

The imbalanced sex ratio may also create an environment in which women have even greater influence, particularly in regard to dating and mate selection. Assuming a strong preference for marriage, exchange theory would again support the notion that women, as the smaller population, would have a decisive advantage. The dyadic power thesis (see Sprecher ) posits that, in this instance, the relative scarcity of women increases their dyadic power within relationships (see also Ellingson et al. ). Hence, women would not only have greater control over the selection of a partner but also wield greater decision-making power within the relationship. This perspective is supported by recent studies which show that Chinese women have become increasingly selective in the marriage market, preferring men with higher salaries, more prestigious occupations, and better living quarters (Liu ). Within the context of dating and intimate relationships, men with less social capital (e.g., educational attainment, conservative woman dating asian man, income, desirable housing) may find it increasingly challenging to find a date, much less a spouse (see Peng ). Understandably, the cultural expectation held by Chinese men that women should be docile and tender may greatly complicate men’s search for a partner, as Chinese women’s greater selection power, coupled with changes in the broader culture of dating, may directly counter long-standing gendered expectations (see Parrish and Farrer ).

Research questions and hypotheses

Given China’s record setting leap into becoming a industrialized country in just a matter of decades on top of having a very ancient cultural history which serves as a source of pride, one would half expect China’s traditional culture to “stand strong like bamboo” or, at worse, perhaps bend a bit. On the other hand, one would expect something to give under such complete and rapid societal change. Young Chinese students should be the members of society who would be most willing to abandon traditional Chinese values and the associated behavioral processes which control dating (and marriage) and move toward adopting Western style patterns where familial relationships are forged out of affective individualism. Under this approach, marriages are based largely on love type feelings and the decision about whom to marry resides mostly with the individual. In an increasingly stratified society, the conservative woman dating asian man might feel most comfortable seeking out life partners who occupy similar positions within the social structure (i.e., education level, social class, occupational prestige, ethnicity). This process is called homogamy.

Hypothesis 1

The dating behavior of students should not be strongly influenced by parents who continue to hold a traditional perspective. In other words, elements of affective individualism should manifest themselves.

An adolescent youth subculture is on the rise in China, and hence, the influence of peers on the dating and courtship behaviors of individuals will increase and eventually become stronger than that of the family. In the power vacuum caused by the decline of parental influence, young people will most likely fill the void as the culture becomes less backward looking and more forward looking.

Hypothesis 2

Peers and the adolescent subculture, as opposed to parents, should exert a significant influence on the dating behavior of Chinese youth.

Chinese culture is thousands of years old. Thus, one should not expect the traditional, conservative, patriarchal Chinese values will completely disappear among present day Chinese youth and trucker dating site canada have no impact on dating relationships. Cultural rebels—male and female—will be present, exploring the uncharted cultural waters. However, cultural conformists who are reluctant to abandon family and tradition will maintain some degree of cultural continuity across time and generations.

Hypothesis 3

Since culture and gender relations are generally resistant to rapid change in society, centuries old traditional conservative woman dating asian man role attitudes should be found to continue to persist among significant numbers of Chinese youth.

To the extent that traditional values about dating and relationships impact the decision-making process, they may also be imbedded in the types of personal qualities that singles are looking for in their potential mates. If traditional values continue to exert an influence on thinking and behavior despite changes in the social context, then males and females will gravitate toward different criteria. Also, comparative research on partner preferences finds that preferences fall into three broad or seemingly universal categories: physical, practical, and personal. The extent to which these three categories are gendered is not addressed in the literature. However, we expect to find them operating in our study population and to be gendered.

Hypothesis 4

Patterns in partner preferences which have been found across societies should be present among Chinese youth, namely, concern about physical appearance, economic prospects, and kind or compassionate personality of future potential spouses.

In addition conservative woman dating asian man the above broad hypotheses, we also expect older students and those who are religious to be slightly more conservative. Students who perform well academically might use that strength as a bargaining chip. Men could use it as an asset to be sold on the dating and marriage market while women could use it as a signifier of them possessing egalitarian values and seeking like-minded mates. It should be noted that in the USA, students who exhibit high levels of dating behavior in high school are less likely to be academic high achievers.

Data and methods

Data for this study were collected during the summer of at a large public university in Shanghai, China. A random sample of students were approached and asked to participate in a survey concerning dating and romantic relationships, conservative woman dating asian man. Of those approached, 87 % agreed to participate and completed the survey. After tabulation of the responses, 17 cases were eliminated due to incomplete responses, resulting in a sample of students ( females and males). The students ranged in age from 18 to 22 and were all currently enrolled at the university. All of the students in the sample were single and never married. Among females,  % described themselves as “currently conservative woman dating asian man someone,” while  % of males described themselves as likewise.

A variety of questions were used to assess respondents’ attitudes, preferences, and aspirations concerning dating and intimate relationships. In regard to dating, respondents were asked to respond to the statement, “I would like to date more frequently than I do now.” Responses ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5). Participants were also queried concerning their willingness to either kiss or have sex on a first date. Respondents were offered the statements: (1) “I would be willing to kiss on a first date” and (2) I would be willing to have sex on a first date.” Responses again ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5), conservative woman dating asian man. Together, these items provide a broad range of assessment concerning dating and intimate relationships.

Respondents were also asked about a variety of family and individual characteristics. In terms of their parents, participants were asked about the educational attainment of their mothers and fathers. The higher of the two (when two parents were present) was then included as a measure of the highest parental education, with responses including “eighth grade or conservative woman dating asian man (1), “beyond the eighth grade but did not complete high school” (2), “high school degree” (3), “attended college but did not finish degree” (4), “four-year college degree” (5), and “graduate or professional degree” (6). Maternal employment was also conservative woman dating asian man, with respondents being queried about whether their mother was employed for pay outside the home (yes = 1, no = 0). Since the familial context is likely to influence both dating and marriage patterns among young adults, participants were asked: “For most of the time when you were growing up, did you think your parents’ marriage was not too happy (1), just about average (2), happier than average (3), or very happy (4).” Since western culture could potentially affect dating and marriage patterns among Chinese young adults, conservative woman dating asian man, the respondents were also queried as to whether English was spoken in their homes (1 = yes, 0 = no). In regard to parental influence, participants were offered conservative woman dating asian man following statement: “I would be willing to date someone of whom my parents/family did not approve.” Responses ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5).

Individual characteristics were also examined within the survey. Respondents were asked to provide their age and sex but were also asked a variety of other questions related to their own traits. Respondents were asked how often they attended religious services, with responses ranging from “do not attend” (1) to “once or more per week” (6). A basic measure of self-esteem was included, using responses to the statement: “On the whole, I am satisfied with myself.” Responses ranged from “strongly disagree” (1) to “strongly agree” (5). In regard to attitudes, respondents were asked about their beliefs concerning gender best mexican dating app within the family context. The statements used in creating an index of gender attitudes included the following: (1) it is much better for everyone if the man earns the main living and the woman takes care of the home and family, 2) both husbands and wives should contribute to family income, 3) a husband should spend just as many hours doing housework as his wife, and 4) the spouse who earns the most money should have the most say in family decisions. Responses to each of these statements ranged from “strongly disagree” to “strongly agree.” After inverting the coding schemes, the resultant combined measure of gender attitudes ranged across a five-point scale, with a higher score indicating more conservative/traditional gender role attitudes (Cronbach’s alpha = ). Respondents were similarly asked about their pro-natalist attitudes by being asked to respond to the statement: “a person can have a fully satisfying life without having children.” Responses ranged from “strongly agree” (1) to “strongly disagree” (5). A measure of school performance was also included, with respondents describing their overall grade performance. Responses ranged from “less than D’s” (1) to “mostly A’s” (8).

Given the complex nature of dating and dating relationships, multiple measures were utilized in these analyses. In regard to dating experiences, conservative woman dating asian man, respondents were asked “thinking back about all of the dating experiences you’ve had, how long was the longest romantic relationship you have had?” Responses to this item ranged The Science of Online Dating “less than a week” (1) to “more than a year” (9). A measure of respondents’ willingness to date dating an older woman audiobook of their own social groups was included through the combination of responses to three different questions. Respondents were asked if, in terms of dating partners, they would be willing to date someone from (1) a different religion, (2) a different race or ethnicity, and (3) a different country. The responses to each item ranged from “yes,” “no,” and “maybe.” Affirmative responses (“yes”) to each were then combined to create a measure of desired heterogamy (Cronbach’s alpha = ), with a range of 0 to 3. Participants were asked how many of their close friends were currently dating or in a romantic relationship. Responses to this question ranged from “only a few or none of them” (1) to “all or almost all of them” (5). Participants were subsequently asked about the specific characteristics which they are looking for in a partner. Respondents were asked to indicate their preference for particular traits by stating whether each quality was “not at all important” (1) to “extremely important” (7). Of the particular traits which were queried, some were used to create indexed measures of a broader set of characteristics. The first of these, pragmatic, is created through the combination of four traits: well educated, wealthy, successful, and ambitious (Cronbach’s alpha = ). The second, caring, is created through the combination of the following four traits: affectionate, loving, conservative woman dating asian man, considerate, and kind (Cronbach’s alpha = ). The third, appearance, is created from the combination of four traits: sexy, neat, attractive, and well dressed (Cronbach’s alpha = ), conservative woman dating asian man. Together, these three measures provide a broader assessment of qualities which the respondents might desire in a potential partner.

Results

Table 1 presents the mean levels of dating and marriage characteristics among young Chinese adults, by sex. As shown, conservative woman dating asian man, an overwhelming majority of both young women and men would prefer to date more frequently. Approximately 66 % of women and 71 % of men expressed the desire to date more often. Given the age of participants in the sample, this is to be expected. In terms of dating behaviors, however, significant differences are shown between the two sexes. Respondents were queried about their willingness to kiss on a first date. Here, significantly more men, as compared to women, stated that they would be willing to kiss on a first date. It should be noted, nonetheless, that approximately 39 % of Chinese women and 42 % of men conservative woman dating asian man not express a willingness to kiss on a first date, conservative woman dating asian man. This finding would appear to suggest the more traditional Chinese cultural expectations pertaining to dating are still influencing dating attitudes and behaviors among contemporary young adults. This possibility is further enforced by the responses shown in regard to participants’ willingness to have sex on a first date. Although young Chinese men are shown to be significantly more willing to have sex on a first date, as compared conservative woman dating asian man young women, almost two thirds of the women and conservative woman dating asian man than a third of the men stated that they would not do so. Hence, while young men may be significantly more likely to be willing to kiss and/or have sex on a first date, as compared to women, it would appear that many, if not most, young men still adhere to a more traditional or conservative approach to dating.

Full size table

Table 2 presents the mean levels of family and individual characteristics among young Chinese adults, by sex. As shown, the parents of both young women and men were reported to have a relatively high level of educational attainment, with the typical parent having at least some college. Among women, approximately 83 % reported that their mother was employed outside the home, while the corresponding employment rate among men’s mothers was 77 %. Both young women and men reported that their parents had relatively high marital quality. Assuming that these responses are reliable, it would suggest that most young Chinese adults have had positive role models concerning spousal roles and relationships. English was spoken only in a small percentage of homes (13 % of women’s families and 14 % of men’s). Familial influence appears to be slightly less influential among young men, as significantly more reported that they would be willing to date someone without their parents’ approval, as compared to women. This finding is somewhat intriguing, as given the patriarchal blackcrush dating site of Chinese culture, one might anticipate parents being more cautious and involved in the dating behaviors of their sons, as compared to daughters.

Full size table

Men in the sample were shown to be slightly older than the women ( versus  years of age, respectively). In regard to religiosity, most respondents reported participating in religious activities only a few times each year. Self-esteem levels reported by the respondents were moderately high, with no significant differences shown between women and men. Neither sex appeared to be overly anxious to become parents, as their relative responses to the query concerning pro-natalist attitudes was somewhat low. This is not entirely unanticipated, as one would tend to believe that college students do not place parenthood high among their priorities at their age. It is worth noting that young men do espouse significantly more conservative attitudes concerning gender and gender roles within the family, in particular. Again, given the more patriarchal nature of Chinese culture, this is to be expected.

In terms of dating, young men reported having had longer relationships in the past, as compared to young women. In order to put this in context, however, it should be noted that the men’s longest relationships, on average, had lasted only a few months. Approximately half of the friends of both women and men were reported to be currently dating. Hence, there is a potential for considerable peer pressure, in regard to dating behaviors. In regard to potential dating partners, young Chinese women and men appear to be only marginally willing to consider partners from outside their own social groups (i.e., religion, race/ethnicity, conservative woman dating asian man, and nationality). This may be a reflection of the lack of diversity within China and certainly as compared to countries with more diverse populations.

Table 3 presents the mean levels of desired hi5 dating app characteristics, as presented for females and males. In terms of specific partner characteristics, young women expressed a significantly higher preference for pragmatic qualities, as compared to men ( versusrespectively). Across all four of the components, females’ preferences in a male partner where significantly higher than those of their male counterparts. Females expressed a significantly higher preference for a male partner who is well educated, wealthy, successful, and ambitious. While not statistically significant, women also expressed a slightly higher preference for caring qualities. It is necessary to note, however, conservative woman dating asian man, that females did express a significantly greater preference for a male partner who was kind, as compared to their male counterparts’ same preference in a female partner. In regard to appearance, while men expressed a slightly higher preference for appearance qualities, as compared to women, the difference was not significantly different, overall. Men did express a significantly higher preference for a female partner who is “sexy,” as compared to the preferences expressed by women for the same quality in a male partner. Overall, these desired characteristics seem to support previously noted gender stereotypes, with women expressing a stronger preference for more pragmatic qualities in a partner, while men, to a lesser extent, express a stronger preference for physical appearance. We will now examine how these various factors affect dating and intimate relationships characteristics.

Full size table

Table 4 presents the results of ordinary least squares regression models of dating characteristics among young Chinese adults. The models are presented separately for each sex, for each characteristic, so as to allow for a more direct comparison of the effects of familial and individual traits. Previous analyses (not shown) were performed to ascertain the need for separate models for each sex. In regard to wanting to date more frequently, females whose parents have a higher level of educational attainment are shown to have a lower desire to date (b = −). Given that Chinese culture places a premium upon educational attainment (Stevenson and Stigler ), this association may result from parents’ desire to conservative woman dating asian man their children succeed (i.e., placing greater emphasis upon education, as opposed to intimate relationships). Females’ levels of self-esteem are positively associated with wanting to date more frequently (b = ), suggesting that self-assurance and confidence may play a substantial role in the dating patterns of young Chinese women. In a similar manner, women’s pro-natalist attitudes are positively associated with wanting to date more frequently (b = ). In regard to desired spousal qualities, a stronger desire for pragmatic qualities is significantly associated with wanting to date more often (b = ). The strength of this association may imply that Chinese women not only desire more pragmatic qualities in a spouse but perhaps also view dating itself in more pragmatic manner. Caring qualities, such a loving and kind partner, also yield a significant association with women’s wanting to date more frequently (b = ), but the association is relatively meager. Finally, women’s desire for appearance qualities is shown to be negatively associated with wanting to date more frequently. Hence, women who place a greater premium upon physical appearance may actually be less likely to want to date more often.

Full size table

In the comparable model of men’s wanting to date more often, conservative woman dating asian man, pro-natalist attitudes yield a negative association (b = −), which is opposite to the same effect shown in conservative woman dating asian man model for women. It is quite possible that men who espouse more brothahassan interracial dating attitudes (i.e., desire children) may be more selective in their dating behaviors, thereby reducing their desire to date many women. Young Chinese men who place more emphasis upon caring qualities in a spouse (b = ), on the other hand, are shown to have a greater desire to date often, conservative woman dating asian man. This difference between women’s preference for pragmatic qualities and men’s preference for caring qualities will be addressed more fully in the discussion section.

Among women, parental educational attainment is significantly associated with the willingness to kiss on a first date (b = ). It is possible that higher parental educational attainment may also be linked with more progressive attitudes and expectations about dating, on the part of parents. Not surprisingly, women who state a willingness to date without parental approval are shown to be significantly more likely to kiss on a first date (b = ). Within the context of Conservative woman dating asian man culture, both of these are likely to be considered progressive and contrary to traditional standards of behavior for young women. Young women also appear to be readily affected by their conservative woman dating asian man, as the number of friends dating is positively associated (b = ) with a willingness to kiss on a first date. However, cheating dating app yields a negative association with women’s willingness to kiss on a conservative woman dating asian man date (b = −), as does pro-natalist attitudes (b = −). Among young men, parental educational attainment reveals a negative association (b = −), which is directly contrary to the effect shown in the model for women. Clearly, the impact of parental characteristics varies, conservative woman dating asian man, depending upon whether they involve sons or daughters. Older males are more likely to kiss on a first date (b = ), as are those who attend religious services more frequently (b = ). It is noteworthy that the desire for heterogamous relationships is positively associated with the willingness to kiss on a first date (b = ) among men, yet the same positive association is also shown in regard to conservative gender attitudes (b = ). This may possibly suggest that young men with a more traditional set of attitudes wish to have both ways—to date outside of their own social groups—yet maintain a more traditional (i.e., patriarchal) role within the relationship.

In regard to women’s willingness to have sex on a first date, the willingness to date without parental approval yields a positive association (b = ), as does the number of friends who are dating (b = ). Since having sex on a first date represents a more tangible breech of traditional standards, it is logical that women must also be willing to break away from parents’ expectations. Along the same vein, having friends who are also dating may provide the social support and reinforcement which make having sex on a first date seem more acceptable to young Chinese women. However, women’s self-esteem, along with their pro-natalist attitudes, yields negative associations with the willingness to have sex on a first date (b = − and −, respectively). Having higher self-esteem, then, may provide women with the confidence or security to not have sex on a first date, whereas lower levels of self-esteem may bring about the opposite. The stronger desire to have children, likewise, may lead young women to be more selective in their dating behaviors or perhaps they may be more likely to associate sex with a more stable and lasting relationship (such as marriage). Among males, the overall robustness of the regression model conservative woman dating asian man not as strong, conservative woman dating asian man. However, conservative gender attitudes are shown to be positively associated with men’s willingness to have sex on a first date (b = ). Again, this may be related to the patriarchal roles found within broader Chinese culture, such that young men with more traditional gender attitudes may believe that they should assume a stronger role in the decision-making behaviors involved in dating and dating relationships. The implications of these findings will now be addressed.

Discussion and conclusions

This study was initiated to provide an exploration of dating and mate selection traits among young adults in contemporary China. The sample used for these analyses is a relatively small and select one and does not necessarily provide for making broad generalizations to the larger population of young adults in China. However, the findings shown herein do offer fresh insight into both the nature of dating experiences and some of the pertinent gender differences which exist.

Overall, both young Chinese women and men expressed a desire to date more frequently, suggesting that the more progressive notions of love and romance may be taking hold within Chinese culture. With the increasing influence of individualism and consumerism, it is not entirely unexpected that Chinese youth should wish to emulate behaviors which they believe to be more “modern” or “western.” Despite their seeming eagerness to be more active in seeking dating partners, there also appears to be considerable adherence to more traditional culture expectations, conservative woman dating asian man. Specifically, only the minority of both females and males expressed a willingness to have sex on a first date. This pattern is certainly more consistent with traditional expectations concerning what is appropriate behavior for young adults in intimate relationships. As expected, significantly more males than females expressed the willingness to have sex on a first date, yet even among males, more expressed opposition, rather than a willingness to do so. This would again seem to support the existence of long-standing expectations concerning dating. Unlike more westernized beliefs concerning dating, sex and sexual behavior still appear to be outwardly undesired by young Chinese adults of either sex. This conclusion is further supported by the unwillingness of both females and males to kiss on a first date. Once again, more males conservative woman dating asian man a willingness to do so, yet substantially more males were clearly opposed to this. While these data are intended to provide an exploratory examination of dating attitudes and behaviors, these findings do suggest that both traditional and more progressive elements are concurrently present in the dating traits of contemporary Chinese young adults.

Gender differences were also noted in regard to the desired partner characteristics, as expressed by females and males. In keeping with long-standing gender stereotypes, females did express a greater preference for more pragmatic qualities in a male partner (i.e., well educated, conservative woman dating asian man, wealthy, successful, and ambitious). This supports previous research which has noted such gender-based distinctions. Chinese men, on the hand, only partially conformed to the gender stereotypes for males. Although men did express a greater preference for a “sexy” female partner, no significant differences were shown for the other attributes related to appearance. Hence, while it would appear that a double standard does exist in regard to desired partner dating site connect with facebook, the more stereotyped expectations are found among women and less so among men.

The multivariate models yielded several rather intriguing findings. In particular, it was shown that Chinese women have a greater desire to date conservative woman dating asian man frequently when they have more pragmatic desires in a prospective partner. Chinese men, on the other hand, have a greater desire to date more frequently when they desire a partner with more caring qualities. On the surface, these two patterns offer some substantiation of the traditional gender-typed beliefs that men are seeking love and romance from dating (and from eventual marriage), while women are perhaps regarding dating as a pathway to marriage and the subsequent security (e.g., financial) offered within. Obviously, additional study is necessary in order to more accurately discern conservative woman dating asian man understand these patterns. These findings do lend support to exchange theory, as each sex does appear to be approaching dating and intimate relationships with somewhat different perceptions and goals.

The potential for more progressive (and westernized) traits can also be seen within the models concerning kissing and having sex on a first date. Among females, the regression models revealed that a willingness to date without parental approval (which would be directly counter to traditional cultural expectations) was shown to be associated with a greater willingness to both kiss and have sex on a first date. Essentially, breaking away from parental control is associated with greater sexual expression among young Chinese women. This would certainly be consistent with a tendency toward greater individualism, as suggested previously. In addition, women were shown to be more likely to kiss and/or have sex on a first date when conservative woman dating asian man had more friends who were also dating, conservative woman dating asian man. Once, again, this suggests a strong peer influence, perhaps part of a broader new youth subculture, which is generally considered to be antithetical to parental and familial influence. Finally, women with pro-natalist attitudes (i.e., seeking to have children, one day) were shown to be considerably less willing to kiss and/or have sex on a first date. If the maternal role can be considered to be a more traditional role for women, it would appear that young Chinese women are giving significant priority to the later role of motherhood, as opposed to indulging in more immediate sexual behaviors in the context of dating.

Overall, these findings suggest that contemporary Chinese youth are perhaps forging a path somewhere discord lgbt dating the expectations of traditional Chinese culture and the more progressive expectations of an ever-changing modern society, conservative woman dating asian man. Youth are often at the “cutting edge” of social change, and their attitudes and expectations are often portrayed as being directly contradictory to and even boldly challenging those of their parents. These results do not suggest that a polarized set of expectations are present; instead, it would appear that Chinese youth have found a balance between the two and appear to be content with the combination. As stated previously, while researchers have directed considerable efforts toward better understanding the nature and dynamics of dating and mate selection among young adults, most of these efforts have involved Western samples. Hence, much of the theory and conceptual knowledge may not necessarily apply to non-Western samples. In particular, the appropriateness of applying of such existing theories and concepts to Asian cultures has been called into question (Ho et al. ). The rapid economic and social change which is occurring in urban centers of China, such as Shanghai, will eventually be evident within the rest of the population, especially as the residential distribution shifts from a rural to an urban majority. Researchers should attempt to address how these ever-shifting social, economic, and political changes will affect not only the dating experiences among the young adult population but also familial structures and behaviors in the longer term.

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